Kissed a girl but later found out she had a BF of 8 years. Am I in the wrong?

I M(24) had met this girl(28) while we were both working at the Coachella musical event that I usually work at every year for a security company doing logistics work.

Since my job required me to be near the admin area where she worked, we got to know each other pretty well as friends. And to be quite honest, in the beginning I only saw her as such. I hadn't even noticed her from the year before.

However, as time went on, I started getting the feeling that she was into me. It was the usual high school cues that sort of tell you someone likes you like always looking at you, always coming over to talk to you, or teasing back and forth with each other. But I had brushed it off by rationalizing that it was just her being friendly.

Still, as the month went on, the cues started getting more indicative that they were more than friendly.

For instance, while on our breaks a group of admin coworkers would sometimes sneak off into the festival for a bit and I would usually sneak off with them. We did this a couple of times, and every time I would end up alone with her while the other admin girls took off somewhere else. On one occasion, as we were out in the festival together, it was starting to get late and we had decided to head back to the admin area before we got into trouble. However, while we were on our way back from the way that we came, the rapper Post Malone came on stage and a HUGE crowd began to form before we could make an exit. We were literally squished between thousands of people where we couldn't even choose the direction that we walked as a result.

But as we made our way through the crowd she grabbed my hand and held onto it the whole time until we made it out of there.

I mean, the situation was scary and lots of people were grabbing each other's hands in their group so as not to get lost or left behind. But she was closely right in front of me and I already had my hands on her shoulders to make sure we stayed together.

I could not imagine that if it were any of my other coworkers with me that they would have grabbed my hand and crossed fingers like she did.

As for another example as to why I started thinking she was into me and not too shortly afterwards from when she first held my hand, I became sick with a horrible cough and she offered me a drink from the straw from her water bottle when there was plenty of free water to choose from elsewhere. And she had insisted when I declined and said things like, "c'mon it's not like I have cooties!"

Again I couldn't imagine any of my other coworkers male or female willing to give my sick self a sip from their water bottle when I could easily have just gotten my own.

So by this point I figured there were enough signs to make a move and I was already starting to develop some feelings for this girl, so I bought two tickets to the famous Coachella Ferris wheel and offered to take her along with me to make up for the scary night of being squished between thousands of people.

She accepted, and by the end of the night of weekend 2 of Coachella we snuck off to ride the Ferris wheel together.

But, to my surprise, she had told me right before we left that it was going to be her last night at work because she was heading back to Mexico (she lives in TJ) for a friend's wedding the next weekend. So I saw it as my only shot to kiss her that night.

And so while the last rounds of the Ferris wheel were going by, I put my arm around her as she then scooted closer and put her head on my shoulder, and then I finally mustered up the courage to lift her chin with my hand and kiss her.

She didn't stop me.. And we passionately made out for a good 10 seconds..

After that first kiss though, I asked if I could kiss her again in excitement, but she had told me just little ones. So it was hard to be sure if she was fully comfortable.

Anyway, we rushed back to work since our bosses were demanding we get back and were blowing up our phones pissed. As a result, I was made to check out before I could say goodbye.

Thankfully, she had asked for my phone number before we took off to the Ferris wheel (another sign I took as positive), so we had each other's contact info. But I came to find out later that since she had a Mexican phone number, my texts did not immediately go through and neither did hers.

So the next day I sort of panicked that she didn't text back and I told her sister (who also was working there) what happened. But then that's when her sister relayed to me she had a BF in Mexico. She eventually did end up texting me back from her email that very next afternoon to my relief, and I apologized for kissing her and all that, but throughout the rest of the week she kept texting me..

I felt guilty for still hoping something would happen even though she was with her BF for 8 freaking years.

But I couldn't stop.

We had this thing going where she'd text me in Spanish to help me learn, but I would text her in French so I was not the only one struggling lol it was very romantic and we'd say good night and good morning to each other everyday.

She had said she had hoped I would make it to work EDC so we could see each other as friends and that she really missed me, but a few days later I had found out I missed the deadline for a Nevada guard card to be able to go.

When I texted her this, I got no reply.

So I went into another stupid panic again and texted her way too many times.

According to her sister, however, she was having reception issues which turned out to be legit, but when she finally contacted me she told me she'd hit me up on Monday when she was back from the wedding.

I waited, and it never happened.

So I texted her a few days after the day she said she'd hit me up passed and we basically ended up saying our goodbyes, nice to know you's, and not meant to be's on a good note because after all, she did live in TJ and had a BF of 8 years.

But after all of that, I was left confused.

Did I see something that wasn't there?

Was she just being too nice and friendly and I misinterpreted?

Or was she just looking for a short term fling with a new guy after being with someone for so long?

I mean, she did not seem to stop me from making moves on her. She seemed to embrace it. And it wasn't from her that I found out she had a BF.

Her sister even said I had gotten her conflicted about her relationship.

Even though they seem very much in love on FB in recent posts.

idk.. It has still left me quite sad, confused, and guilt-ridden nearly two months later.

Gee whiz. Can't you accept it for what it was? It's like meeting someone on a cruise or a vacation at a resort. You have a nice time with the person. You do a little smooching. And that's it. You go back home. What happens in Coachella stays in Coachella. It's not like you guys slept together. Just remember it fondly and move on with your life.

Well it seems like everyone is just going to troll me on here. And since i can't delete this post, consider it closed since i won't be responding to it.

Well it seems like everyone is just going to troll me on here. And since i can't delete this post, consider it closed since i won't be responding to it.

That's probably for the best, she has a boyfriend, this is a non starter, that's probably going to be what most responders say.

Your response shows emotional immaturity because someone did respond and you ignored it and none of us can help when a troll enters the board.

We're not here to dance for free love. You're young, find someone available, don't use Coachella to find a girlfriend.

You shouldn't feel so guilty, OP. You didn't know she had a boyfriend, and I agree she was giving some signals that she was interested.

However, she went back home and reality hit. She is not single and shouldn't have been kissing anyone else, and she probably feels guilty for it.

I would do your best to let it go, and not contact her again.

Why feel guilty? She never told you about her BF, and when it was over, that's when you found out. If anything she's feeling a bit guilty, hence the reason she didn't reply, and finally with a few days passed, had time to think about it, she said her goodbyes.

You got swept up into something pretty intense, which was fun when it lasted. And hell you had something that you want so bad...how can you help that? It sucks that it wasn't meant to be.....just keep it as a pleasant memory that you can look back on with fondness....now it's time to shake it off and move on with your life.