How do you move on after being betrayed (Rant)

My ex has left me not once but twice. The second time he broke up with me was on Christmas(didn't even text me to say he was done with the relationship he just started to ignore me) since then I have not talked to him but me being me I was worried about him for some reason and texted him about three weeks ago saying I hope he is doing well and of course he did not respond. Since then I have blocked him and have been really happy but I recently found out that the reason he left me so coldly was because of some girl that he is attracted to .What hurts me the most is I never hurt or did anything wrong towards him I gave him everything foolishly, anything and everything . We were long distance and when I would go out Ill meet guys and just spend time annoying them talking about my boyfriend ,not knowing that my ex was in his home town flirting with other girls, while all I did was miss him and travel 4 hours every three weeks to spend time with him. What i can't get over is the fact that he treated me very badly and I did nothing to deserve that.All the times that he was selfish I stuck by him and in the end he continued to break my heart very coldly. I know I am done and don't want him back but what I can't seem to move on from is the betrayal , and trusting people. I can't trust people at all especially men and the one time that I tried to be open to trust someone they hurt me. I just can't . I don't understand people.This whole thing has really made me question life whats the point of being good if you keep getting burned in the end .I always believed that if you are nice and respect people they will follow after your actions.I find myself asking God what the hell did I do to deserve this.

You trusted someone who was not trustworthy.

The lesson you need to take from this isn't F

DONT TRUST MEN.

It's...don't overinvest in a relationship when the other party isn't meeting you half way. Why were you the one doing all the traveling?

When you act like a doormat...don't be surprised when people wipe their feet on you.

You trusted someone who was not trustworthy.

The lesson you need to take from this isn't F

DONT TRUST MEN.

 

It's...don't overinvest in a relationship when the other party isn't meeting you half way. Why were you the one doing all the traveling?

 

When you act like a doormat...don't be surprised when people wipe their feet on you.

I was doing the traveling because of his job he had to work various hours on the weekends so it was easier for me to travel to him so that we was able to go to work on the weekends as well as spend time with me.

I guess now that I see if maybe I was being a doormat but I felt I was trying to be a good girlfriend

Then perhaps he was not in any ace to date so.done that lived 4 hours away, was he?

Then perhaps he was not in any ace to date so.done that lived 4 hours away, was he?

Im sorry I'm confused. what is your question? I met him in college we dated junior and senior year and I graduated a semester before him and that summer that I graduated he broke up with me , we ended up getting back together 9 months later and at that time he and I were living in out college town two months after we got back together he moved back home and we doing long distance for about 10 months ago when he left me again

So what? So you dated in college...real life happened and you did all the traveling to be with him.

"god" didn't send him because you don't deserve better. you picked and kept him because you didn't think you get to demand better.

he's not the reason you can't trust. you didn't trust you'll get fair treatment before, so to play the only script you know (i guess) you hooked up with a guy you have to travel 4 hours to get a weekend outta a month with and rehooked with him despite having felt miserably neglected and despite him repeatedly abandoning you. Abandonement sounds like an ever-present theme you keep returning to.

you move on from the betrayal by challenging the beliefs and learned behaviors that predispose you to self-sacrifice, subjugation, emotional inhibition, enmeshment, shame, deprivation, and treating whatever neglect/abuse has convinced you you always get the short end of the stick.

the way to NOT move on from the betrayal is by continuing to dwell on how crude he is to discard you and how people don't reciprocate kindness. you can't change him or others, but you can distance yourself from unappreciative folk, even if it means staying in your own company alone. the person you can, and should strive to change and empower is you, and ultimately, that is the same person you certainly get to spend your life with. "She" at least should have some appreciation for you and agree your worth isn't diminished if you're not sacrifising yourself for anyone.

So what? So you dated in college...real life happened and you did all the traveling to be with him.

yeah i see what your trying to say

"god" didn't send him because you don't deserve better. you picked and kept him because you didn't think you get to demand better.

 

he's not the reason you can't trust. you didn't trust you'll get fair treatment before, so to play the only script you know (i guess) you hooked up with a guy you have to travel 4 hours to get a weekend outta a month with and rehooked with him despite having felt miserably neglected and despite him repeatedly abandoning you. Abandonement sounds like an ever-present theme you keep returning to.

 

you move on from the betrayal by challenging the beliefs and learned behaviors that predispose you to self-sacrifice, subjugation, emotional inhibition, enmeshment, shame, deprivation, and treating whatever neglect/abuse has convinced you you always get the short end of the stick.

 

the way to NOT move on from the betrayal is by continuing to dwell on how crude he is to discard you and how people don't reciprocate kindness. you can't change him or others, but you can distance yourself from unappreciative folk, even if it means staying in your own company alone. the person you can, and should strive to change and empower is you, and ultimately, that is the same person you certainly get to spend your life with. "She" at least should have some appreciation for you and agree your worth isn't diminished if you're not sacrifising yourself for anyone.

sorry i should have put in the post that we were dating college and moved to different states so we became long distance but yeah i stayed . I now can see that the problem that I contributed to the relationship is that I stayed and gave to much and asked for little in return . I also learned that I have abandonment issues ,I hate being abandon buy yet I let him come back because he was my first love.

I think my obstacle will be trying to not dwell on the betrayal.I know he wasn't that great of boyfriend but I put up with me and loved for everything flaws and all but I have to learn to be selfish sometimes .

So, I will try to challenge my beliefs and hopefully it helps me move on because I really don't feel that it is fair for me to be hurt and not happy and I want to be happy again without the pain.

you move on from the betrayal by challenging the beliefs and learned behaviors that predispose you to self-sacrifice, subjugation, emotional inhibition, enmeshment, shame, deprivation, and treating whatever neglect/abuse has convinced you you always get the short end of the stick.

the way to NOT move on from the betrayal is by continuing to dwell on how crude he is to discard you and how people don't reciprocate kindness. you can't change him or others, but you can distance yourself from unappreciative folk, even if it means staying in your own company alone. the person you can, and should strive to change and empower is you, and ultimately, that is the same person you certainly get to spend your life with. "She" at least should have some appreciation for you and agree your worth isn't diminished if you're not sacrifising yourself for anyone.

My ex has left me not once but twice. The second time he broke up with me was on Christmas(didn't even text me to say he was done with the relationship he just started to ignore me) since then I have not talked to him but me being me I was worried about him for some reason and texted him about three weeks ago saying I hope he is doing well and of course he did not respond. Since then I have blocked him and have been really happy but I recently found out that the reason he left me so coldly was because of some girl that he is attracted to .What hurts me the most is I never hurt or did anything wrong towards him I gave him everything foolishly, anything and everything . We were long distance and when I would go out Ill meet guys and just spend time annoying them talking about my boyfriend ,not knowing that my ex was in his home town flirting with other girls, while all I did was miss him and travel 4 hours every three weeks to spend time with him. What i can't get over is the fact that he treated me very badly and I did nothing to deserve that.All the times that he was selfish I stuck by him and in the end he continued to break my heart very coldly. I know I am done and don't want him back but what I can't seem to move on from is the betrayal , and trusting people. I can't trust people at all especially men and the one time that I tried to be open to trust someone they hurt me. I just can't . I don't understand people.This whole thing has really made me question life whats the point of being good if you keep getting burned in the end .I always believed that if you are nice and respect people they will follow after your actions.I find myself asking God what the hell did I do to deserve this.

Watch this video...it helped me a lot and I hope it helps you

Watch this video...it helped me a lot and I hope it helps you

 

]

 

Thank You!!!!