Goodbye, ENAers

[CynicalGuitarist]

I didn't assume anything; I was just saying that people who preach extremes on both ends of the spectrum are ridiculous in my book. Misery is misery, no matter what.

[melrich]

How is your relationship with your mom?

[melrich]

I dont understand what he wants... why post the thread if he doesnt want help?

Does he want to feel wanted? we are all trying to help and getting blown off...

 

Guys these are not appropriate responses.

 

Cynical is talking about things that are difficult to express. Stop jumping down his throat.

[ScreenagerX]

Obviously your Dad meant something to you, how do you think he would react if you killed yourself?

[CynicalGuitarist]

How is your relationship with your mom?

 

I love my mom, and is probably the only reason I didn't kill myself 5 years ago. She (like many others) just doesn't take me seriously and acts like I'm too interruptive or histrionic or something.

[melrich]

I love my mom, and is probably the only reason I didn't kill myself 5 years ago.

 

Does you mom have any idea about how you are feeling now? Would you be comfortable telling her?

[EvaGina]

You make me so angry.

You think your problems are worse than those of others? NO ONE expects you to "get over" your fathers death...

as for everything else, that is ALL up to you and EVERYTHING you just spouted off was an excuse.

No one will do it for you, if you want to play the victim when the ONLY thing you just mentioned that you have no control over, is your fathers death. (im not belittleing it, but its a fact of life)

[CynicalGuitarist]

Obviously your Dad meant something to you, how do you think he would react if you killed yourself?

 

too late to think about that now, 'cause he's dead anyways.

[CynicalGuitarist]

You make me so angry.

You think your problems are worse than those of others? NO ONE expects you to "get over" your fathers death...

as for everything else, that is ALL up to you and EVERYTHING you just spouted off was an excuse.

No one will do it for you, if you want to play the victim when the ONLY thing you just mentioned that you have no control over, is your fathers death. (im not belittleing it, but its a fact of life)

 

If I make you so angry, why even reply?

 

Did I say I have it worse than everyone? no! Not everyone who has problems thinks that theres are the worst, but since you're assuming things about me, then I'll assume that you think depression is all in the head... this mindset hasn't helped the fact that half the people in the US of A suffer from depression.

 

See, this is what I'm talking about... I'm tired of folk always assuming things about me. If I wanted people to assume things about me, I'd go out clubbing.

[Blackhawk2009]

dude why kill yourself..for all you know u could be going to an even worse place...based on what you believe..but why not stay here and try to make it better

[EvaGina]

If I make you so angry, why even reply?

 

Did I say I have it worse than everyone? no!

 

See, this is what I'm talking about... I'm tired of folk always assuming things about me.

 

Do you want help?

Do you want to live?

 

Then ask us for help... ask for our support while you DO SOMTHING about your situation. We are all, always here to lend a hand.

[samiami]

I am sorry to hear about your dad. That is something that is very hard to get over. One day you will come to peace with it, but understand it will take a lot of time.

 

As for the job thing, well, what kind of job are you looking for? When you've never been employed, you have to start out small. Go to restaurants and grocery stores. Those places are always hiring kitchen staff and busboys and bagboys and stock boys. You'll get hired. Heck, you could even get a paper route. They're not just for kids anymore!

 

As for people picking on you, pick back! Being different is hard, but what makes you strong is being comfortable with it. When others see that you are PROUD of who you are, they won't have anything to pick at.

 

Girls girls girls. You say that girls won't touch you. Except the ones you're not interested in. Now, the girls you like aren't interested in you, and the girls that like you, you're not interested in. I'm not saying you have to settle, but think about the reasons that you aren't interested in these girls. I mean, put the shoe on the other foot. Think how you feel when the girls you like won't give you the time of day. Now, look at those girls who like you and that's probably just how they feel. That's all I'm going to say about that.

 

You say you fail miserably at everything you do. The only people that fail are the ones who don't try. You have to tell yourself that you ARE GOING TO BE THE BEST at whatever it is. Only YOU can give yourself the confidence to suceed. Besides, you seem to be good at the guitar. Why else would you want to pursue a career?

 

The problems with your mom not buying you new equipment, well that problem will be solved once you go out there and get that job. Then you can buy all the equipment you can afford. And problems with your mom aren't going to last your whole life, you know. Eventually, you'll be moved out and you don't have to do what she says. For the time being, however, mom is the rulemaker. Everyone has to live under their parents' thumbs at some point, and it's up to you to make something of yourself so that you're not living there until you're forty-five!

[beh700]

hey, my name is bethany. the world is obnoxious but i think the only reason you are so frustrated is that you are too big of a person and want to change every fault that everyone has. obviously showing you are a caring person who wants to help. if you care so much then live for everyone you will effect. you've already effected my life with this post. you'll save the suicidal coffee girl when saying she has a pretty smile, and help win the vote in 2008 for a president to help voice your opinions, and when you live you give a reason for your family to live. the world can only change if there are people to change it.

 

you're strong enough to live life to the bottom. now be strong enough to see it up to the top. please hang on. i'm always free to talk.

[CynicalGuitarist]

I have the money to buy new equipment, but my mom won't allow me because she thinks it's a "waste of money" and it will "disturb the neighborhood" like it isn't bad enough anyways with cars with extremely loud woofers. At least I can release my anger with a drumset.

 

"you don't fail unless you try" tell that to the public school system... see how much credibility you'd get for saying that.

[melrich]

Do you play in a band at all? Is there anywhere else you can set up that would work?

[Locke2121]

AH! Now you give us something! I can understand the loss of a parent...I lost many important people as well. I can only say that pain does go away if dealt with in a proper way. How did you grieve for your father? Or did you hide the pain away? That happens a great deal.

 

A job? So what? Everyone has to get a job sometime. You expect managment the first time out? Nope, think dishwasher, busboy or gas station attendent. We all have to start at the bottom. As time goes by you will succed.

 

Why should you give a damn about what other people think of you? If people are to immature to take you as you are, then you don't need 'em! As for girls, well we all have problems there..some more than others. I don't see how you expect girls to like you though, since you don't seem to like yourself very much. You must undergo a change where you shed this scared and frustrated shell of a boy and start becoming a man. The women will respond to it. But first, you have to believe it yourself. With confidence will come a new outlook. Just getting a job will help you there!

 

ADD and MD huh? Well that is a bad combo. There are always good drugs though but you keep talking about your guitar. Can I take it that it calms you down? Many ADD people find that there is one aspect of their lives, cars, women, music or work that seems to calm their minds enough for them to think clearly.

 

Why should your mom put up money for a new axe? If your not working, she is under no obligation to buy you a new toy. But if you do get a job, that problem will take care of itself!

 

 

So you want to be a musician? Cool, I've always wanted to play guitar but my fingers are too stiff. What you need to do is get a job and get the recording and dubbing equipment you need to start making a few demos. I know, thousands of demos pass through Nashville, LA and NY every day, but you may get lucky! At the very least, getting a job will help pay for new equipment, maybe even an old beat-up car that will allow you to go to towns close by and look for playing gigs in bars and such.

 

Hmm....you know, except for the ADD and MD, your problems really aren't that hard to fix. A simple job bagging at a supermarket and getting money in your pocket is a great start towards fixing them. But to do it, you've gotta want it! It may start with slopping pigs, but if you want it hard enough, you can end up playing at a swanky stage in LA. You just gotta want it hard enough to take that first step!

 

Good luck dude!

[samiami]

I have the money to buy new equipment, but my mom won't allow me because she thinks it's a "waste of money" and it will "disturb the neighborhood" like it isn't bad enough anyways with cars with extremely loud woofers. At least I can release my anger with a drumset.

 

Unless you can show her how mature you are and sit down and talk to her about it. Or write her a letter. I used to do that with my mother, we did NOT get along. But if you calmly approach a subject that is iffy with her, be prepared for it. Know what you're going to say. Maybe get a job and then talk to her about it. Tell her how important music is to you and how much use you will get out of the equipment. Tell her that you will only play loudly between certain hours of the day. Whatever you do, don't raise your voice or get whiny, because with moms, that only leads to her saying no.

[CynicalGuitarist]

Unless you can show her how mature you are and sit down and talk to her about it. Or write her a letter. I used to do that with my mother, we did NOT get along. But if you calmly approach a subject that is iffy with her, be prepared for it. Know what you're going to say. Maybe get a job and then talk to her about it. Tell her how important music is to you and how much use you will get out of the equipment. Tell her that you will only play loudly between certain hours of the day. Whatever you do, don't raise your voice or get whiny, because with moms, that only leads to her saying no.

That's what I've been trying to tell her for the past 3-4 years.

[fnlyfrei]

My take on suicide is this. The life you have been given is a gift. You might not want this gift, but who says it was a gift to YOU? Perhaps you were sent here for someone else. You will serve a purpose you never imagined. If you kill yourself..you are robbing someone else of the influence you were supposed to have given them. The butterfly effect so to speak. By leaving the world..in such a negative way..you are adding to everyone's collective pain...by staying and making some sort of difference in a positive way..you are adding to everyone's positive energy. Like it or not, we are all connected. We all are here to teach each other something. Why are you announcing it? Because you really do not want to do it. If you really did....you would be silent. Your pain might seem unbearable...but if you can get through it...you can help and teach someone else who is going through something much the same how to cope. What do you think this website is for? No one here is a trained advice-giver...we have all had different experiences..and some the same..and we are helping each other. None of us are ever really alone.

[samiami]

That's what I've been trying to tell her for the past 3-4 years.

 

Well, then go about it a different way. Or drop it for awhile. A long while. If she's constantly hearing about it, she's gonna be pissed everytime it comes up. Give it a good LONG time before you bring it up again. Re plan your speech and go for it again.

[fnlyfrei]

My take on suicide is this. The life you have been given is a gift. You might not want this gift, but who says it was a gift to YOU? Perhaps you were sent here for someone else. You will serve a purpose you never imagined. If you kill yourself..you are robbing someone else of the influence you were supposed to have given them. The butterfly effect so to speak. By leaving the world..in such a negative way..you are adding to everyone's collective pain...by staying and making some sort of difference in a positive way..you are adding to everyone's positive energy. Like it or not, we are all connected. We all are here to teach each other something. Why are you announcing it? Because you really do not want to do it. If you really did....you would be silent. Your pain might seem unbearable...but if you can get through it...you can help and teach someone else who is going through something much the same how to cope. What do you think this website is for? No one here is a trained advice-giver...we have all had different experiences..and some the same..and we are helping each other. None of us are ever really alone.

[CynicalGuitarist]

AH! Now you give us something! I can understand the loss of a parent...I lost many important people as well. I can only say that pain does go away if dealt with in a proper way. How did you grieve for your father? Or did you hide the pain away? That happens a great deal.

I ended up hiding the pain away for the most part because I was tired of my mother babying me and my brother treating me like he was the only one that was hurt.

[CynicalGuitarist]

Well, then go about it a different way. Or drop it for awhile. A long while. If she's constantly hearing about it, she's gonna be pissed everytime it comes up. Give it a good LONG time before you bring it up again. Re plan your speech and go for it again.

 

It really has been carefully spanned because I'm avoiding her annoyance, but she just won't listen or take my musical dreams seriously, so I stopped trying.

[EvaGina]

It really has been carefully spanned because I'm avoiding her annoyance, but she just won't listen or take my musical dreams seriously, so I stopped trying.

 

move out? She cant tell you what to do when you arent in her house

[Locke2121]

Your about to become a man. Its your life and you have to take charge of it. I can understand where mom is coming from, nobody wants their baby to try such a desperate career. But like I said, its your life. And its time you start thinking about if you want to continue living under mom's thumb

 

As for your pain, to heck with your brother's self centered attitude. I know he was hurt too, but its YOUR pain. You don't need anyone else to witness it to give it validation. Let it out and to heck what people say or think!