Style of dress hurting me?

[Kevin T]

More so a social thing, in reality.

[txblues]

Is there anything else I should be considering changing/implimenting, style-wise?

 

Anyone else have anything to say about this?

 

I am open to suggestions from all. Thanks.

 

The blazer and jean look is really in right now, its not as warm but i'm not sure about wearing a car coat over it. I prefer a black blazer and black shoes for going out. For a shirt throw in a few meterosexual colors like baby blue; i'm not a fan of the all pink shirt yet; maybe with pink/violet stripes. a black blazer pretty much can can look good with any color.

 

some girls it doesn't matter; went to a bar that was kinda nice where most people dressed up. but then i see cute girls who date guys that look homeless--scraggly beards, jeans, tattoos , the grungy type.

 

for school the nicest i would dress would probably be brown shoes and a leather coat. i have some 3 year old brown broken in shoes i wear everywhere; nothing too shiney that requires regular shine and polish like my black shoes; only time i wear athletic shoes is for exercising.

[Kevin T]

some girls it doesn't matter; went to a bar that was kinda nice where most people dressed up. but then i see cute girls who date guys that look homeless--scraggly beards, jeans, tattoos , the grungy type.

 

I know.

 

Some women will jump at the chance to date Oscar the grouch. Guess the slob look is in... least where I (supposedly) get educated. Yes, I question the quality of my formal education.

[g1234567890h]

You should wear what you want, period. I exclusively wear army fatigues and black t-shirts with a black coat and black Vans. I have long hair and a goatee. I also wear glasses. I run a comb through my hair a couple times in the morning and other than that I just let it do whatever the hell it wants to. I go to work in these clothes. I teach preschool. I'm in college and I go to school in these clothes. I go on dates in these clothes. If I need to be formal, it's just a pair of black cargos and a black button down shirt. I wear that to weddings. The only time I wear a suit is to funerals. I sometimes wear the trench coat and black leather gloves.

 

I've dressed like this since my early teens and I never had problems with girls. My current girlfriend came up to me and asked me out on a date. And she is the kind of girl that guys try to pick up all the time. I kind of stick out in the crowd, so maybe that helps. She says I scare people.

[Kevin T]

I don't wanna scare people. lol

[tmp0620]

I'll bet you a million dollars that the problem that you have with women is that you intimidate them.

[Kevin T]

I'll bet you a million dollars that the problem that you have with women is that you intimidate them.

 

How so? Can you elaborate please?

[charley]

Is there anything else I should be considering changing/implimenting, style-wise?

 

Anyone else have anything to say about this?

 

I am open to suggestions from all. Thanks.

 

Yes, but we covered that a long time back in this thread. Many people covered it. Then we all fixated on your coat because most of us objected, but you weren't willing to change, at least not at that time. So as a result, we all fixated on trying to convince you, and one or two people tried to console you about coat.

 

Earlier in thread there were many other suggestions besides those about coat. Still think coat is number one though. Then worry about the details.

[charley]

trench coats remind me of detectives in old movies, gothic kids, and nazis

its not cute.

unless its a stylish-yet-youthful burberry number

ditch it

pleaseeeeeee.

 

So it's OK if he looks gay and girly in a Burberry one? Take note of that Kevin. Sounds like she's saying that trench coats are not cute on you, unless it's a girly looking one. I'm calling that an addtional vote for "no fricken way" on the trench coat OF ANY COLOR!!!

[Kevin T]

So it's OK if he looks gay and girly in a Burberry one? Take note of that Kevin. Sounds like she's saying that trench coats are not cute on you, unless it's a girly looking one. I'm calling that an addtional vote for "no fricken way" on the trench coat OF ANY COLOR!!!

 

I have to wonder what your fixation is with being so ant-trench coat. It seems so... vehement.

[charley]

How so? Can you elaborate please?

 

I'll bet you $20 that he answers that your trench coat is intimidating, or scaring them off. Want to take that bet?

[Kevin T]

I'll bet you $20 that he answers that your trench coat is intimidating, or scaring them off. Want to take that bet?

 

If I had the money to spare. lol

 

Intimidating isn't necessarily a bad thing. It can actually be a good thing. Frightening people, however, not a good thing. lol At all.

[charley]

I have to wonder what your fixation is with being so ant-trench coat. It seems so... vehement.

 

I'm fixated on trying to help you, which means trying to convince you. That's why.

[Kevin T]

I'm fixated on trying to help you, which means trying to convince you. That's why.

 

You seem far more passionate about it than the others though. So naturally, I had to ask why.

[tmp0620]

Firstly there are some pretty classy trenchcoats out there. You don't necessarily have to look gothic or like a nazi if you want to wear a trenchcoat.

 

What I meant with my previous post was that you might be intimidating girls if you are real well-dressed, well-groomed and decent looking.

 

You should try surprising people in ur classes by coming to school for a day unshaven with crazy hair and trashy clothes.

[charley]

You seem far more passionate about it than the others though. So naturally, I had to ask why.

 

Let's try this. Leave it home 5 days a week. On those 5 days wear various other type coats and other looks that people have recommended (the car coat aka parka length being my favorite). Then compare how women relate to you with vs. without trench coat. I think you'll see a difference.

 

Of course this experiment would work best with women who are not accustomed to seeing you in a trench coat. Those women already have that mental picture of you.

 

This experiment would be ideally conducted when out away from school around new women who don't know you. Then you can see for yourself.

 

I do that type experiment with my different coats and looks and I thereforeeee have a good idea how my various looks appeal to (or don't) different women, and I can often even get some idea what a particular woman likes, or doesn't like.

[Kevin T]

Firstly there are some pretty classy trenchcoats out there. You don't necessarily have to look gothic or like a nazi if you want to wear a trenchcoat.

 

What I meant with my previous post was that you might be intimidating girls if you are real well-dressed, well-groomed and decent looking.

 

You should try surprising people in ur classes by coming to school for a day unshaven with crazy hair and trashy clothes.

 

Yeah, that was what I was talkin' about! lol

 

Intimidating, I would assume, is a positive thing.

 

I did that once... for an experiment, I didn't shave, or comb my hair, I skipped my shower that morning and wore an old t-shirt and pair of pants. I basically looked like I just rolled out of bed and looked like a complete slob.

 

Anyone like to guess what the outcome was?

[charley]

Firstly there are some pretty classy trenchcoats out there. You don't necessarily have to look gothic or like a nazi if you want to wear a trenchcoat.

 

What I meant with my previous post was that you might be intimidating girls if you are real well-dressed, well-groomed and decent looking.

 

You should try surprising people in ur classes by coming to school for a day unshaven with crazy hair and trashy clothes.

 

Ya. I had my two days a week I didn't shave: Fri and Sat. Some women do like some stubble, others like clean shave. So this way, I showed some variety. However, my hair was still good, or covered by hat. In no circumstances do I want cruddy hair.

 

I don't think I'd go to crazy hair and trashy clothes though, but I did wear jeans and a sweatshirt those days, or jeans and a colored T-shirt. That's not trashy, but it's not classy either.

 

I said it way earlier in this thread: showing some variety keeps you entertained with yourself, and it shows women your various looks. Maybe one of those looks will appeal to her. Maybe the variety will appeal to her.

[Kevin T]

Let's try this. Leave it home 5 days a week. On those 5 days wear various other type coats and other looks that people have recommended (the car coat aka parka length being my favorite). Then compare how women relate to you with vs. without trench coat. I think you'll see a difference.

 

Of course this experiment would work best with women who are not accustomed to seeing you in a trench coat. Those women already have that mental picture of you.

 

This experiment would be ideally conducted when out away from school around new women who don't know you. Then you can see for yourself.

 

I do that type experiment with my different coats and looks and I thereforeeee have a good idea how my various looks appeal to (or don't) different women, and I can often even get some idea what a particular woman likes, or doesn't like.

 

 

As I said, cash flow is seriously clotted, thereforeeee purchasing a new coat is out of the question at this present moment in time.

 

I do have a couple other wintery type jackets. Not sure what they're called. They look, you know, like a normal winter jacket. I think it's blue. lol

 

That said, it's an interesting experiment, similar to the one I tried the one day a while back.

[Kevin T]

Ya. I had my two days a week I didn't shave: Fri and Sat. Some women do like some stubble, others like clean shave. So this way, I showed some variety. However, my hair was still good, or covered by hat. In no circumstances do I want cruddy hair.

 

I don't think I'd go to crazy hair and trashy clothes though, but I did wear jeans and a sweatshirt those days, or jeans and a colored T-shirt. That's not trashy, but it's not classy either.

 

I said it way earlier in this thread: showing some variety keeps you entertained with yourself, and it shows women your various looks. Maybe one of those looks will appeal to her. Maybe the variety will appeal to her.

 

Ah, but you forget what thing: Most of the men I go to school with also look like this. Slobs, my term for them. Of course, not all of them having the ladies going after them, either, so...

[Ellie2006]

for an experiment, I didn't shave, or comb my hair, I skipped my shower that morning and wore an old t-shirt and pair of pants. I basically looked like I just rolled out of bed and looked like a complete slob.

 

Anyone like to guess what the outcome was?

 

Kevin, Hi. Maybe it was too extreme a turnaround?!

 

Bottom line: based on the pics you posted, there's absolutely NOTHING wrong with the way you look and dress.

 

[The whole "drop-the-trench-coat" thing was simply a suggestion based on my limited observation of what college students seem to be wearing]

 

You already know this so I feel pretty silly saying it BUT what every women likes is different so keep true to YOU and you will attract the type of women who are, perhaps, more compatible with you (and shares YOUR sense of style).

 

Just a thought.

 

ps. How's that cough? Hope you are feeling better!

[tmp0620]

Yeah, that was what I was talkin' about! lol

 

Intimidating, I would assume, is a positive thing.

 

I did that once... for an experiment, I didn't shave, or comb my hair, I skipped my shower that morning and wore an old t-shirt and pair of pants. I basically looked like I just rolled out of bed and looked like a complete slob.

 

Anyone like to guess what the outcome was?

 

What was the outcome? Some funny looks? Did you expect a bunch of girls to ask you out that day?

 

Yes I meant intimidating in a positive way (sorta positive accept that they might be afraid to approach you because they think you're better than them or something).

 

Try being lazy with your style every once in a while. That's not to say you should be dirty... It just might show the people that you are around everyday that you aren't so different from everyone else. Know what I mean?

 

And relax

[Kevin T]

Well, beyond being mortified, I don't really remember much from that day. I remember feeling like a goof and an idiot, but that was about the extent of it. I certainly did not expect any special attention from women. And nor did I get any... I know that much.

 

As for the whole coat thing... I was going to post something about it last night, but it got deleted and didn't go through, so I didn't bother. I get what everyone (mostly) is coming from. I need to be mindful of the image that I am projecting to the world.

 

I honestly never really thought much about it. I simply "liked" it. But why do something that isn't helping me and is causing me to be seen in a light I do not want? Basically, the trench coat is associated with three main types:

 

The school shooter, the nerd and the loner (more accurately, the angry loner). Since I am none of the three, I need to stop showing myself to the world in that guise. Knowing that I'll most likely be seen as one of those three (or maybe some scary combination of them, which is likely since they are not mutally exclusive), why on earth would I want to walk around dressed like that?!

 

I felt like death until this evening, Ellie. I feel a lot better now, but the last two days were dreadful. I didn't go to school either day, I was so sick. Yesterday, I slept over 18 hours. I was exhausted and barely ate a thing, though I drank over 4 litres of fluids.

 

Oh yeah, and thinking back on things... I have gotten attention from girls, but being in class, I was not wearing the coat. See, no coat = attractive. Coat = not so much. lol

 

That argument is probably quite accurate, I think.

[charley]

Somewhere way earlier in this thread, I'd said not to buy dressy casual or dressy clothes from Walmart. You know, polos, slacks, etc.

 

However, it's a fine place to buy socks, underwear, jeans, and colored T-shirts, or white T-shirts, if they fit. That's wear I buy my socks and underwear.

[charley]

Oh yeah, and thinking back on things... I have gotten attention from girls, but being in class, I was not wearing the coat. See, no coat = attractive. Coat = not so much. lol

 

That argument is probably quite accurate, I think.

 

So now you're using algebra to figure out women? Ha ha. I do agree with your equations though.

 

I guess math can be successfully applied to most anything.