what am i going to do

[bigredvick]

My girlfriend is 3 months into her pregnancy and she just found out that she was pregnant or at least that is what she told me. Before she would joke around and say I'm pregnant and I'm going to leave him with you and all this other nonsense. But now she really is pregnant and surprisingly she is very calm. I don't know what to do. I mean I'm not stressed about her being pregnant and all I have a job and I can support her and my son(I am praying for a son) but how am I going to tell my mom. I mean she won't be unnoticeable the whole time. What I am trying to say is how am I going to break it to my mom that she is going to be a 34 year old grandma?

[arwen]

Well, some simple math makes me believe that she used to be a 17-year old mom when she had you as well. I think that having experienced a teen pregnancy possibly makes her upset, on the other hand she KNOWS how it is, and seeing that you love your gf, intend to provide for the childe, I think she will accept it. I would tell her sooner than later.

 

Ilse

[Survictor]

You know, after the initial 'you've perhaps ruined your life' bit and the worry etc., she will come round and start getting excited about the baby's arrival. You will see her start buying little things. Can you go to your parents together to support one another, let them know you are really together and intend to remain together. Tell you Mum that you realise it is a shock and perhaps you should have waited. You realise things might be tough but you are happy to be having this baby and you want her to be happy too.

 

Wishing you well.

[bigredvick]

lol you dont know my mom. today my sister had asked my mom what she would do if she was pregnant and she said that she would kick her down the stairs and then stab her 3 times in the stomach to make sure it is dead. im afraid ill end up caustrated

[doyathink]

I got this email today...kinda fitting...lol

 

The Goodbye Letter

 

A father passing by his son's bedroom, was astonished to see the bed was

nicely made, and everything was picked up. Then, he saw an envelope,

propped up prominently on the pillow. It was addressed, "Dad." With the

worst premonition, he opened the envelope and read the letter, with

trembling hands.

 

 

Dear Dad,

 

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope

 

with my new girlfriend, because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and

 

you.

 

I've been finding real passion with Debbie, and she is so nice, but I

knew you would not approve of her, because of all her piercing, tattoos,

her

 

tight Motorcycle clothes, and because she is so much older than I am.

But

it's not only the passion... Dad she's pregnant.

 

Debbie said that we will be very happy. She owns a trailer in the woods,

and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of

having many more children. Debbie has opened my eyes to the fact that

marijuana doesn't, really hurt anyone. We'll be growing it for

ourselves, and trading it with the other people in the commune, for all

the cocaine and ecstasy we want.

 

In the meantime, we'll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS, so

 

Debbie can get better. She sure deserves it!! Don't worry Dad, I'm 15,

and I know how to take care of myself. Someday, I'm sure we'll be back

to visit, so you can get to know your grandchildren.

 

Love, your son,

John

 

P.S. Dad, None of the above is true. I'm over at Tommy's house. I just

 

wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than the report

card that's in my center desk drawer. I love you! Call when it is safe

for me to come home.

[scarew]

ROFLMAO! That is the greatest letter I have ever heard. Maybe I could do something similar for when I tell my father I am pregnant. LOL all the cocaine and extacy we want... priceless.

[scarew]

Sorry vick,

 

That letter distracted me. But the others are right hun. I will be telling my family soon about my pregnancy. Some will have a problem with it, some won't. It's to be expected. But after everyone is done putting in their two cents they will just be happy for you and excited to see the new baby. P.S. it DOES sounds like your gf could have communicated to you a little earlier. 3 periods is alot to miss and not know that you are pregnant... I would confront her, but careful, she is pregnant and moody, so be soft and sweet. Tell her that if you guys are raising a family you need to be 100% honest. Its the only way. good luck baby,

 

Sarah

[bigredvick]

Funny letter doyouthink, thanks Sarah, and good luck with telling your family. Do you want a boy or a girl and which one are you actually having? THE WEIRD THING IS SHE HAS ONLY MISSED ONE AND SHE STILL HAS BEEN HAVING HER OTHER PERIODS. SO SHOULD I BE WORRIED ABOUT THAT OR IS THAT NORMAL FOR SOME EXPECTANT MOTHERS?

[southerngirl]

Its possible to have a period and still be pregnant. HAs she taken a pregnancy test?

 

If she is pregnant she needs to go to the doctor. You should go with her then you will have proof that she really is pregnant.

[BornToResist]

Ooooh scary. I hated telling my mom. As for my dad? I'm too scared to say anything.

 

BUT, the good news is, once I told my mother, she had her words and opinions, but when it came down to it, she has been behind me 100%. Your mother was a young mother and probably had different hopes for her children, but she has been in your shoes, hasn't she? Of course I don't know her so it's hard to say what it's going to be like, but it is so unbelievably difficult to be upset about a pregnancy...it's a miracle, not a curse.

 

When did your gf take her pregnancy test? Has she been to the doctor? How does she know how far a long she is? My mom had her period for 4 or 5 months when she was pregnant with my brother and everything turned out just fine, so don't worry.

 

Good luck!!!

[rocio]

She may have still had something like a period, but a bit different.

 

You don't sound like you have alot of trust for her. She has messed with your head in the past and you say, "she's pregnant, or so she says". What's with that?

 

Be 100% certain that she is pregnant before you talk to your mom.

[bigredvick]

we took 3 different pregancy tests and they all say thaT SHE IS PREGNANT. IT WOULD HAVE BEEN 4 BUT SINCE THE FIRST THREE SAID SHE WAS PREGNANT I TRIED ONE TO SEE WHAT IT WOULD SAY. i am not pregnant fortunatly

[rocio]

i am not pregnant fortunatly

 

Well that's a good thing. Two pregnancies in one relationship: I don't think any couple could handle that.

[southerngirl]

Has she made an appointment to go to the doctor? Thats really the next step. To get proper care for the unborn baby.

[arwen]

we took 3 different pregancy tests and they all say thaT SHE IS PREGNANT. IT WOULD HAVE BEEN 4 BUT SINCE THE FIRST THREE SAID SHE WAS PREGNANT I TRIED ONE TO SEE WHAT IT WOULD SAY. i am not pregnant fortunatly

 

LOL! Well, I think that you can be sure that your gf is pregnant. Three false positives in a row... that would be against all odds! Anyway, your gf needs to go to a doctor asap. There, she can have a bloodtest to get a 100% sure result, and a checkup to see if everything is really ok. She will have to see an obgyn for regular checks, prenatal care, etc. In addition, you have to plan your finances, where you'd live since you're both underage. Please tell your parents. The more procrastination, the heavier the issue will be. At this point you can only imagine what your mothers/fathers will respond. Usually your imagination is far worse than reality, just DO IT!

 

Ilse

[redrose85]

we took 3 different pregancy tests and they all say thaT SHE IS PREGNANT. IT WOULD HAVE BEEN 4 BUT SINCE THE FIRST THREE SAID SHE WAS PREGNANT I TRIED ONE TO SEE WHAT IT WOULD SAY. i am not pregnant fortunatly

 

ROFLMAO

 

first step is to get her to a doc. after that, tell the parents, then, start thinking long and hard about what to do. Everything will work out in time

[bigredvick]

she had a miscarriage...

i dont feel too well anymore. i dont know why i feel like this but it seems that nothing matters anymore. i have no energy left within me...

[BornToResist]

I'm sorry you are hurting.

 

That cannot be an easy situation for either of you to be in.

 

Stay strong.

[Hope75]

Hey There,

 

I'm sorry that this happened to both of you.

 

I imagine you are having a hard time right now.

 

Try to hang in there friend, we are here for you.

 

((HUGS))

[redrose85]

I'm sorry you are both having to go through this. I do feel that some things happen for a reason, but I won't preach. *hugs for you, flowers for your gf*

[bigredvick]

i had just finished talking to the mrs and i found out that this person is the reason for me losing my son. he was playing around with her and had laid her on her stomach and put his elbow in her back. he killed my son before he could ever breath. what should i do to him, because i want to kill him, but then if i do that then i am separated from my better half. should i just beat him half to death or have someone else kill him? i cant turn the other cheek.

[southerngirl]

What 'person' are you talking about?

 

Also, I doubt horseplay would have caused it. Sometimes these things happen.

 

I am very sorry for your loss, no I do not think you should act out in violence toward anyone.

[Hope75]

i had just finished talking to the mrs and i found out that this person is the reason for me losing my son. he was playing around with her and had laid her on her stomach and put his elbow in her back. he killed my son before he could ever breath. what should i do to him, because i want to kill him, but then if i do that then i am separated from my better half. should i just beat him half to death or have someone else kill him? i cant turn the other cheek.

 

It is not likely that any type of fooling around like this would have caused a miscarraige. Most often early miscarraiges are caused by a deformity in the fetus that is incompatible with life... it happens alot, that's why many women won't disclose they are pregnant until they reach the 12 week mark, because at that point, it is pretty certain that the fetus will be able to live. I understand that you are angry, but it is not wise to place the blame on anyone. This is a very common thing, and esp. with your girlfriend being so young, the chance of spontaneous miscarriage in the first trimester almost doubles in teens, as their bodies are not mature or ready to support a fetus.

 

I don't think you really need us to remind you that hurting another person is NOT a good idea- not to mention how much good it will do you and your grieving girlfriend to have you end up in jail. Think about the bigger picture here. It is illegal, it is immoral, and it is very unlikely that it had anything to do with what happened.

 

I hope that you will come back and update us, and please think about this long and hard, and don't do anything foolish that you cannot take back.

[bigredvick]

he is 200 pounds. he is her cousin. she is 90 lbs and is 4'5 feet tall. she was past the 12 week mark. she was on 15.

[southerngirl]

If they were just playing around then it wasnt anything intentional. Did he physically try to harm her? Had she even told anyone she was pregnant?

 

YOu can look and try to point fingers blaming anyone. But, that isnt going to help you get through this. The loss of a child is very traumatic. Right now your girlfriend needs you to be strong and supportive. Love her. Thats what she needs.