I hate this bumped into Exs profile online somewhere else

[Spawn]

Crap.....its my fault i shouldn't have searched ner name, didn't think she wud be there, i saw her ex there and she is with him now profile says committed, she still stays where she was, workin as a teacher and also studying.

 

One thing led to other and she is perfectly fine talkin to many guys for friendships and what not...no problem but why did i look into her friends list...hate this.

 

i am not jealous but i am really hurt by me now....shouldn't have bothered at all, i am not healed fully...

 

to make matters worst she will know who visited her profile, logs always show up on the front page.

 

ahh how can i be so stupid...i am shakin now.

 

Sorry all...

 

Hate this...i have let down myself.

[Beec]

So, act like it does not bother you at all. Leave her a message or note that says you hope all is well with her.

 

If you act like it does not bother you, it won't after a while.

[Spawn]

you serious on the leave her a message thing....she is committed and in a relationship with a guy whom she couldn't get over with while she was goin out with me.....

 

won't that flare things up...she already called me names cause i told her not to contact and to work it out with her ex.

[Beec]

Well, if you set out specifically to have no contact. Maybe not . . .

 

But still don't let her know things bother you.

[Spawn]

i just don't feel right about contactin....she says stuff that hurts me a lot and she doesn't care a crap about me when we broke up the way we did.

 

If she says somethin crap i will be hurt cause i was nice to her and she never believed me....it was toxic Beec.

[Spawn]

she is gonna find out and feel probably the same way as i am now....

[Spawn]

But still don't let her know things bother you.

 

Silence helps?

[sparkle1]

Poor you.....

 

Its OK to feel like you do. I have purposely not looked at my ex's profile - blog thing (what ever its called) coz i know i won't like what i see. But, i can totally understand why people look, in some weird way it like self torture.

 

You've done it now, end of story. You can re build yourself from this. you've accepted that you weren't as over her as you thought,...and now you can re heal.

 

Dont contact her or leave the message, sorry but i think it will fuel her. She'll know you've been on ther e- and there is no reason for her to think you done it by accident etc. Just accept what happened...try not to think sooo much about what she may or may not think...likely hood is- she won't read into this as much as we are thinking she will.

[Spawn]

man i just have to get my compsure back.....i feel the same pain as i did long time back

 

guess me shakin so much means its trouble and i shouldn't venture more into that territory....

 

i just never expected her to be on link removed

[sparkle1]

I forgot to say this last time....but you have not let yourself down. You are human and unfortunately we all have these things called 'emotions' that do us over from time to time....

 

You have taken a step back on the route to recovery...but you'll leap forwards soon....you recovered once, you healed...you will do it again - and be even stronger this time round...

 

X

[DBL]

So, act like it does not bother you at all. Leave her a message or note that says you hope all is well with her.

 

If you act like it does not bother you, it won't after a while.

 

I would go with the suggestion above. If you are going to get busted, go with some style. I would also instigate stuff. When you leave your message make reference to the hot sex you two had. hopefully that should stir something up between her and her man.

 

Don't show no mercy.

 

DBL

[Spawn]

there is a difference DBL....i was the one who told her to stop contacting me and then told her a lie so she wud go back to her ex feelin all hurt from ma side.....

 

the way she used to talk to her ex and all at 2 AM and stuff....don't want to recall...it put me thru nightmares.

 

I somehow went thru all the contacts she been havin with people...they are all there to be seen, she is happy now and moved on works as a computer teacher for some school.

[Spawn]

i think i will just take this pain on again, i dunno i hate the netspeak she still uses to communicate.

 

people over there say she is matured and stuff, she may have but i don't want any friendship cause i know how it was when i was with her....it was pure torture.

[jdheinold]

i've done the same thing, and i felt terrible after it...then after a few days i felt better. it's rather crushing when you first see things you know you don't want to see, but just have to. it is a self torture deal, and it sucks, but sometimes curiosity just gets the better of us.

 

its a set back, it sucks, you'll heal.

[Spawn]

i hope so jd....i just got up dreamin everythin about her, couldn't sleep with her memories before that.

 

man does this suck.

 

anyways....like her ex i won't do the same mistakes of contactin an ex while she is in a committed relationship more than that she is workin on her graduation which she had left and i had been tryin so hard to get her to do that.

 

She has finally gone back to college, has a job, in a committed relationship with some guy....i am happy for her.

 

I will leave it at that....spawney is a nice guy and can still go thru this pain once more

[Spawn]

I forgot to say this last time....but you have not let yourself down. You are human and unfortunately we all have these things called 'emotions' that do us over from time to time....

 

You have taken a step back on the route to recovery...but you'll leap forwards soon....you recovered once, you healed...you will do it again - and be even stronger this time round...

 

X

 

thanks sparkle and others too

 

i don't know why it hurts to hear that she is happy and workin out in life even thought i am still happy for her cause i wanted her to get a job and concentrate on her studies when we were together...she is doin exactly that accept now i am not with her.

 

I hope she remains happy the way she is, i am not a nice guy in her opinion just like some other guy who say somethin and does somethin

well she is over me for sure....feel crapped out again, i can feel for all those guys who bump into their exs each day now. if one small ,one side contact, can do this, can't imagine what the scene wud be like meetin in person.

[jdheinold]

thanks sparkle and others too

 

i don't know why it hurts to hear that she is happy and workin out in life even thought i am still happy for her cause i wanted her to get a job and concentrate on her studies when we were together...she is doin exactly that accept now i am not with her.

 

I hope she remains happy the way she is, i am not a nice guy in her opinion just like some other guy who say somethin and does somethin

well she is over me for sure....feel crapped out again, i can feel for all those guys who bump into their exs each day now. if one small ,one side contact, can do this, can't imagine what the scene wud be like meetin in person.

 

amazing...my situation is almost exactly the same...only she started going to school again while she was with me. its been a year now, and i'm 100% sure she is over me...by a long shot. i'm still struggling a bit, but feeling better daily while i make new discoveries about myself.

 

all in all, this whole experience has just sucked; a huge roller coaster ride. (suicidal tendencies, hysterical laughter...) when i think about my ex i still get a feint feeling in my stomach; its very uncomfortable, tho i'm sure with a little more time and distraction, it'll be all good.

 

just keep on keepin on and you'll eventually feel better. set backs happen, and man o man do they hurt, but you'll find that each time they come along, the time to heal will be shorter and shorter and you'll rationalize the situation instead of sitting in misery.

 

one thing to consider...stop thinking about how she feels about you. you're not together any more, so there is no need nor is there any point. it will just depress you.

 

oh, and no one has called me JD since i was maybe...11?