Seeking Advice on an Odd Topic

[gnabna]

I am scheduled to have a breast reduction/lift. This is something I have wanted to do for quite some time. This sounds superficial and foolish on one hand but on the other it is good to have a healthy body image. Here is where it all gets just messy. I have been married for over 16 years but have been separated for 3 months. Sadly it looks like the end result will be a divorce. So while recovering from all of that emotionaly - I am projecting the what if of a future relationship. Way- way down the road. My husband always said the large anchor scars would not bother him. But he also said for better or for worse! Ha note the humor- promised that is not laced with bitterness. I really am healing.

 

Anyway. I would love to talk to my male friends about their view on the topic but it is just too personal. I really do not want to be like oh btw I am having a reduction do you think that those scars will repulse a man.... Lovely. Again, I am mortified!

[melrich]

I am sorry to hear that your marriage may be ending. To your question, there is no denying that certain people can react negatively to things like scars. But I am positive the vast majority of men would not think twice about it.

 

If it is going to make you feel better and more confident about yourself then that is going to be far more noticeable to guys than a couple of scars.

[vandgsmom]

*Not a Guy*

 

But I am covered in scars from about 16 different surgeries... INCLUDING a reduction when I was 15... none of the 3 men who have ever seen them have ever commented besides saying, man you are tough!

 

If he is put off by a little scar that was made for your health and well being, then he is not worth being with!

[gnabna]

thank you ladies! hahaha.. i am sure men are not going to respond to this.

 

i see that i some how made a new post instead of tackin gon to my original post. yikes, can we say newbie?

[vandgsmom]

I have a feeling melrich did that, but I will see if I can round up some guys for you...

[melrich]

thank you ladies! hahaha.. i am sure men are not going to respond to this.

 

i see that i some how made a new post instead of tackin gon to my original post. yikes, can we say newbie?

 

Hi gnabna,

 

Yes I moved your post here as it is on topic and I think you will get more replies here. BTW I am male and responded to your question.

 

cheers

[gnabna]

Oh mercy! I am so sorry- here you are helping me and I have inserted my foot in my mouth. Thank you kind sir... My screen name should be continualymortified! ha!

[vandgsmom]

LOL... it's ok. I pm'ed a few of the guys that are on, but they may not be watching their screens...lol

 

In the meantime, can I ask if the reduction/lift is for aesthetic or medical purposes?

[HellFrost666]

If I really loved somone a few scars wouldn't make a difference, really.

 

Also, I am just a strange individual at times, and I would probably find the scars fascinating.

 

On a side note, this is my last post as "member"... Woohoo, I'm climbing the ladder. Soon I'll achieve my goal of world domination, hehe.

[annie24]

I am female

 

I think that if this is something you want to do and feel that it is medically the right choice, go for it. i think if you meet the right guy, he will understand why you did what you did and won't second guess your decision.... I bet he would even be proud of you for it.

[gnabna]

[in the meantime, can I ask if the reduction/lift is for aesthetic or medical purposes?

 

Honestly it is a little bit of both. I suffer from migraines, numbness in my hands as well as back pain due to my breast size. I am not huge but for a 5ft3in frame and a very active lifstyle it has just taken it's toll. I also have four amazing children that have played a significant part in the "wear & tear". So that is a lovely benefit to the reduction is the automatic lift that comes along with it!

[melrich]

Go for it gnabna, the health and well being benefits you get out of it will far outweigh the scar thing.

 

How are all your kids? Are they all living with you? Sounds liek you must have a lot on your plate right now.

[vandgsmom]

Don't you love the 2 for 1's??

 

I am getting my large intestine removed on Wednesday and as a bonus, if the surgery goes absolutley perfectly, when the doc sews me up, if there is time left, I get a mini-tummy-tuck! Yay!

[gnabna]

My children are doing phenomenal! Thank you for asking Melrich. Yes all four live with me. My oldest son is 16, then my 11 year old son, 9 year old daughter and the baby girl will be 7 years old next month. Def a full plate but so worth it!!!

 

Praying that your surgery goes PERFECT vandqsmom!!!

[spiderman_56]

lol.... breasts ... our good ol friend ..lol

well.. it depends on how big the scar will... well if it's just little marks that go un-noticed or the other person notices only you tell them ...i say go for it ...

However it's also depend on how much you have / you want to reduce ...

breast define a good chunk of feminity as per 'the guys point of view' , a part that captivate male attention pretty well as you have noticed...

 

My best bet ... big enough so they look good on you and that you love them ...

[melrich]

That's great. I hope they are all good. Seperation/divorce can be hard on them, particularly at those ages. Hope you can stick around here for a while and get to know the place.

 

cheers

[brando]

So it is the opinon about the scars from the reduction that is your primary concern??

 

If it is beneficial to your health, go ahead and get the reduction done. In my opinion scars would not bother me, nor knowing you har a reduction.

[Orlander]

At work we specialize in procedures of this type. There should not be big scars and the scars that are left should fade.

 

Besides, a guy looking at those wont be concerned with scars...my ex had a couple of scars from having lumps taken out of both breasts and I NEVER NOTICED the scars!!

[vandgsmom]

See.. I told you the boys would come.

[BBHFutureAllAmerican]

i'd do it breast size isn't overly important in my book anyway but i wouldn't be scared of guys running away from you, whatever you need to do to make yourself happy

[RelaxByWater84]

I had some deep cuts that left ugly scars, I was embarrassed by them. Then I read an article by a former model that she put Vitamin E on her scars and they went away. I tried that and it worked. Hope this helped.

[gnabna]

I had some deep cuts that left ugly scars, I was embarrassed by them. Then I read an article by a former model that she put Vitamin E on her scars and they went away. I tried that and it worked. Hope this helped.

 

Thank you CoffeeGirl. The plastic surgeon has mentioned the vitamin E as well as Mederma type products. The scars will fade with time but I think that if it is has been an issue in my mind that it might be in a guys mind as well. But everyone here has been more then helpful in easing my anxiety! Thanks!

[Dako]

I'd be more concerned about your emotional scars from the surgery if I were a guy dating you. Guys are more understanding than advertising may suggest. I hope all goes well for you.

[Ipso Fracto Man]

Real men don't fear scars. Then again, they don't fear gravity's effects on the human body, either.

[Cardinal]

You know how some women view battle scars on a man as rugged and sexy? I would feel pretty much the same way about any size scar you might come away with from this surgery. It is fun to play the scar game with a new person in your life. Good way to get to know one another and become comfortable with sharing your bodies. It is definitely nothing to be ashamed of and I would certainly applaud any action you take to better your health. It shows you have your priorities in line!

 

It wouldn't matter if you needed to or wanted to have your whole breast removed. You wouldn't be any less attractive in my eyes. Men can see far beyond the physical too. And such a minor detail as having a few breast reduction scars is really nothing to concern yourself about.