ever seen this?

[therookie]

I really like this 18 year old girl who will be 19 shortly. I'm a few years older than her. My opinion is that she is very "inexperienced" with men and thereforeeee shy.

 

To tell you the truth, I've never seen anyone like that before! I know she likes me as she stares at me when I work, (were co-workers) then looks away real quick when she sees me glance at her.

 

Her mother said she doesn't go to the school proms, and when her friends call to see if she wants to party, she would rather stay home and read a book.

 

She really won't talk to me that much, but she talks to ALL the other female coworkers a lot.

 

How can I deal with this situation?

 

Is she uncomfortable?

[Tex1907]

How can you deal with the situation? Talk to her. Ask her out.

[a2000]

She sounds like me. Talk to her. Get to know her. Get her number. Ask her out.

Most of all be patient with her because if she likes you, she will eventually open up to you and it will be worth the wait

[Beec]

Start simplpe with her. If you make her confront her fears directly, then she may be scared and turn tail. Begin with shorter conversations, and then extend them. When you first see her, each day, you should always tell her "Good Morning _____" using her name. Do that for a while, then stop and ask how she is, adding that into the conversation. And look at her when you do ask, make eye contact. Now, find somewhere in your head a switch, that turns off this greeting and conversation. Make her wait for the greeting on some days.

 

When you see her begin to look for you greeting her, let a little tension rise, then do it, on some days. But that should be a signal. Soon, you will need to ask her if she wants to go for a cup of coffe or lunch, dinner should follow, but take it easy.

 

But that signal is her telling you she wants the attention and some conversation. Find out something she is interested in and ask her about it. Learn about it to know more intelligent questions. In the middle of the first conversation that's longer than how are you, WHEN SHE IS TALKING, ask her for lunch or coffee or something. You'll be in.

[chai714]

I like Beec's advice here. By doing the above mentioned, you're building a good level of comfortability with her. I see this as sort of hunting, where you gradually build a level of comfort with her, taking small steps. In between those steps, you're trying to create a bit of anxiety on her end by not saying "hi" at times or waiting till longer to do so.

 

As for conversing, ask her open ended questions. Since you know she enjoys reading, ask her what her favorite book is and what it's about. Ask her if she has ever thought about writing a book and if so what it might be about. These are all questions related to her and her likings so it's highly probable she'd be willing to talk about what she likes. Generally speaking, people love talking about theirselves and the things they like. She's no different - it's just a matter of approaching her and gradually bringing her out of her shell.

 

Good luck.

[therookie]

That's some excellent advice chai714! I've done that where I've held off saying hi at all, and it seemed the next time she saw me at work she would be a "little" more conversational.

 

I think she's also very cautious also...She probably likes the attention, but has a difficult time on the giving end...