3some, possibly 4some questions...

[itsallgrand]

While they can work in people whom are NOT couples, I have yet to see a successful end to a relationship where a couple ventured into threesomes and so forth.

 

I know a few couples whom tried it, and NONE of them stayed together in the end. The decision to go that route was a last ditch attempt from one or both partners to revive things, and it did not help the strength or commitment together at all.

 

BINGO.

all my opinion

3somes arent for marriage-monogomy relationships PERIOD.

It's disaster to keep up the pretense of being completely exclusive to one person and yet to sleep with others. Really simple, not complicated.

 

With that in mind, people who are not looking or realize their relationship is not exclusive Can Pull This Off.

It can be great as a single or in a casual relationship. (if you go for that sort of thing)

[OceanEyes]

one month before our wedding, he told me he didn't believe in monogamy and that the idea of an annual one-weekend break from each other would probably keep us married.

 

Ouch. Must have been a shocker at the time. Just out of sheer curiosity; did you agree to those terms or follow through with them for his sake?

[Dregnought]

The jelousy - I used to be extremely jelous of my gf to the point

where i saw some new person on her account and i thought that she was cheating with me.

 

Something happened but now i'm not jelous anymore - I know shes mine and mine forever shes i'm hers forever. You could say I grew out of it.

 

My baby and I once had a 3sum with my most trusted friend (and her best friend whom shes been with for so long) and it was awesum. We knew that there was gonna be little jelous cuz it was me and my gf and she had a bf who was like us (she did ask him and he was ok with it - he wanted to as well but the opputinity hasnt come), very much in love. Alot of cordination though. And alot of moaning Ohenstly I only slightly regret it, but only slightly - I havent kept myself fully for her, but neither did she and we both agreed so its a bit better.

 

This was only up to oral - no intercourse - reserved for partners only. I suggest that you 2 only do it with a very close friend that you 2 trust to the max. Right now, both me and my gf have envolved much more. Still bunnies when we can, but i couldnt imagine sex with anyone else. The max i can imagine is being naked in front of our friend. Thats it. I seriously dont plan any more group sex at all, i'm fine with what I get from her. Plus if by some off chance i get someone pregnant it can only be my gf and not our best friend which would be disastu

 

He knew that at first the idea really turned me off, because I didn't think it was right to want to have sex with another man, or for him to have sex with another woman. He did put my mind at ease a little though, by telling me that we would be expanding our sexual horizons, by using unconventional "sex toys". That way actually did make me more comfortable with the idea.

You arent comftable at the idea at all if you have to force a specific idea to make it right - if you do it is a mistake , atleast until your somewat comftable with the idea. I really stress that you 2 dont, espically with some random stranger.

[z9z]

hmmmm Dear to ask you to have sex with other guys means he doesnt love you ! i mean who would ask his gf lets say not his fiance to have sex with other guys and infront of him i wonder howcome he'll handle this * * * * and about my opinion the long term effect you guys wont LAST AND he will leave you.. simply he got bored of u two havin sex and he wants 2 enter some1 new even if its another guy later on he'll get bored and he'll look 4 new pll ! guys r not safe at all and its a sign .. JEALOUS THEN ASKS YOU TO SLEEP WITH OTHER GUY ! weird to hell

[BellaDonna]

one month before our wedding, he told me he didn't believe in monogamy and that the idea of an annual one-weekend break from each other would probably keep us married.

 

Of everything I have read in your post, this by far, is the most troubling. It tells me that he is not ready for marriage, and you might just be convincing yourself that you want a 3some or 4some to pacify him, because you fear losing him.

 

Based on the information you have given here about the jealousy and his statement about not believing in monogamy....I can't see your relationship surviving, especially after a 3some.

 

 

BellaDonna

[Dregnought]

I agree - I can't remember if you said how long you two have been together. Bella is right, really you two are losing the relationship, and if you two don't do something soon it's more then likely that that wedding will never happen.

 

Forget about the sex, forget about the marrage, just focus on each other. Find out what is wrong and fix it. I don't know if you have noticed or not but you might of found things between you two to be degradeing somewat.

 

You must go back to when you first noticed it and find out what has changed. And fix it.

[mgirl]

Who would want to put themselves through the degradation of being the 3rd or 4th person in a sexual union within an established relationship is beyond me. Then again, there are desperates out there who will do it.

 

It sounds like your sex life has become lack lustre, or else you wouldn't be considering a 3rd or 4th person.