childhood experiences

[canuckhead]

Don't really know where to put this but anyways...

im just wondering if a person would grow up to be like their parents/family? Say ur dating someone, but he/she didn't really have a great childhood...parents divorced, r selfish, neglected the kid, etc....would the guy/girl grow up to be just like them? cuz i keep feeling (but this is just my opinion) that ppl learn about relationships mainly from their parents right? they learn about what love is...and what a healthy relationship is from them....i mean, school doesn't teach this stuff. so say ur thinking long-term with this person...thinking about family in the future....is it normal to worry that ur partner would just suddenly turn out to be just like their parents? or would it be the opposite and since this person has already gone thru this experience that he/she would actually do his/her best to not be like that?

[melrich]

Children will always carry some traits of the parents but they will also become their own people. Children of divorcing parents are statistically more likely to get divorce than those of parents that stay together.

 

But that does not mean that they necessarily will.

[Meow18]

Like Melrich said, it's possible, but not always true.

 

Some people learn from their parents mistakes, but some people do take on their parent's worst habits. It's hard to say until you get to that point.

 

Relationships are about 2 people.. and those 2 people alone. You just need to start slow and build a good relationship with that other person. I think that will help you be able to trust that you learn who that person really is and what they will be like.

[Momene]

Agree it can go either way. It's true to say that all of my relationships have had some unhealthy aspects at some time. Scary!

[chemica]

My parents were both very shy and my dad's first serious girlfriend was my mom at age 36. Crap, I am ending up exactly like them.

[yeawutever]

If he/she choses to improve their behaviors and not be like their parents, then the relation would be good, it all depends on the person to go for the better. Just cuz one of your parents was an alcoholic wasn't mean you're gonna become one, it's your chose to get wasted and be a scrwe-up or to have a life.