oldflam3 Posted June 25, 2006 Share Posted June 25, 2006 Do they still admire their bodies in a sexual way? How do young girls feel when an old guy is staring at them. When I was young, I thought it was pathetic when a guy over 30 or 35 would look at me. I remember thinking: Why can't you find someone your age??? I am 42 now and find all guys around me looking and commenting on girls aged 18-20. They are all 45-50 and they don't see anything wrong with that. I find this a bit disgusting. Am I the only one who feels this way? I would really like to know what other people think about it – especially older men and younger women. Any thoughts? Link to comment
TheRedQueen Posted June 25, 2006 Share Posted June 25, 2006 Yes, I find that in general men are disappointing creatures. Link to comment
Dako Posted June 25, 2006 Share Posted June 25, 2006 As a 53 year-old, I have a bit of an opinion, but it's just my opinion. First off, older guys admiring young women aren't always dirty. On the contrary, older men are often admiring more than their sexual attractiveness. After a few years on Earth, a guy might discover more subtleties about women than a 20something guy might even see. I don't stare at women, But find them charming and feel somewhat protective of them. I appreciate them in ways I never did as a young guy and ironically, see them with new eyes. I'll stop now and don my flamesuit. Link to comment
TheRedQueen Posted June 25, 2006 Share Posted June 25, 2006 Dako of course is an exception to the rule Link to comment
CarnelianButterfly Posted June 25, 2006 Share Posted June 25, 2006 Yes, I find that in general men are disappointing creatures. LOL!!! On a more serious note... I don't find it gross or pathetic. A man doesn't lose his sexual desires after 40 and 20 something women are not instantly less attractive when men turn 40. They are men, no less so than the younger guys. Like Dako said I think older men are more appreciative of women in general. If a guy looks at me no matter his age, I take it as a compliment. If he stares like a lecher then it does get uncomfortable, but that is true for young guys as it is for older men. Link to comment
nicorette Posted June 25, 2006 Share Posted June 25, 2006 i know waht you mean, i know im only 18 but i often get 30 year olds or even sometimes as old as 40 or 50 hitting on me. i find it perverted because of my age and they could be as old as my father. i am really creeped out when i see an older man (as in over 10 years) staring at my body, or looking me up and down, and they do it very rudely, as in "checking me out". its quite scary. i was at the beach in my bathing suit adn there was this old man taht was just sitting there staring and mine and my friends bodies. then when i gave him an extremely dirty look (for staring) he looked away. they dont do it so subtly at all..i think they think theyre invisible..haha Link to comment
itsallgrand Posted June 25, 2006 Share Posted June 25, 2006 Yeah, it bothers me at times. It bothers me especially when those older men give those young women power over them that is based on sexuality and youth. It bothers me that there are some older men who change into different people when they are around me or other young women: suddenly they are imbeciles. And I'm not 20, but neither am I 40. It just makes me sad for their wives. Well, it makes me feel bad for the species. It makes me dread growing older as a woman - sexual power goes down in ways - BUT, as I grow a bit older, and get to know some truly incredible women who have some years and experience to speak of, I can deal with it. Older women have an incredible amount of POWER. I am looking forward to it now! There are so many other aspects of a woman to delight in and to look forward to experiencing that I never could have had or was clueless to earlier and now. The times they are a-changing: we women do not need to depend on our vulnerability, youth, and sexuality for clout and full opportunities in this world anymore. Most young women have no idea what they are doing, and their power is wasted. They often are put at a disadvantage or hurt. Besides, there are some decent men in the world. Some who see a child as a child, and a woman as a woman. In my eyes - an 18 yr old is still a girl by most means. Sure, she's got the body, but the preparation otherwise and maturity is such that she is still a baby. Older men can appreciate that and be fine by me: but a healthy set to me would to feel a more familial tenderness. That's just me. OK, you weren't looking for a novel, right?! Don't worry: there will always be idiots and those pulled along by their pants....just align with the other few ones. Some older men are appreciating the young women without being pigs. Link to comment
lonestar_80 Posted June 25, 2006 Share Posted June 25, 2006 Ha! I was just talking about that! I agree with you I think it is kind of sick. I think guys look at girls old enough to be their daughters b/c some guys are just old dirty bastards. Young girls have firm skin and are not flabby from old age and child birth. Plus, I think most men have some sick sort of Lolita fantasy. I also think that some men want to control a woman and they have better luck in controling young girls than old ones. A mature woman won't put up with thier BS. Age is just the main thing, there are plenty of older women that look very young like JLO, Janet Jackson, and Kristen Davis. They look better than most teenagers and 20 year olds. Guys just like having a baby on their arm. A famous actor once said why have a dog when you can have a puppy! Link to comment
oldflam3 Posted June 25, 2006 Author Share Posted June 25, 2006 If your flame suit is all zipped up, I'll start On the contrary, older men are often admiring more than their sexual attractiveness. After a few years on Earth, a guy might discover more subtleties about women than a 20something guy might even see. I don't quite understand what you meant by that? The way I understand it, you are even more into young women than you were when you were young? Not only that you admire their sexual attractiveness, bat more… Am I right? I don't stare at women, But find them charming and feel somewhat protective of them. Why do you feel protective? I appreciate them in ways I never did as a young guy and ironically, see them with new eyes. Is it possible to tell me what those other ways are? Link to comment
TheRedQueen Posted June 25, 2006 Share Posted June 25, 2006 i know waht you mean, i know im only 18 but i often get 30 year olds or even sometimes as old as 40 or 50 hitting on me. i find it perverted because of my age and they could be as old as my father. i am really creeped out when i see an older man (as in over 10 years) staring at my body, or looking me up and down, and they do it very rudely, as in "checking me out". its quite scary. i was at the beach in my bathing suit adn there was this old man taht was just sitting there staring and mine and my friends bodies. then when i gave him an extremely dirty look (for staring) he looked away. they dont do it so subtly at all..i think they think theyre invisible..haha Yes nicorette, they often can be ogling ogres! Link to comment
hosswhispra Posted June 25, 2006 Share Posted June 25, 2006 My perspective has evolved. When I was 18 year old on the racetrack and much older men looked me up and down, it scared me. I am not curvy and I don't have hips or breasts and am built like a 12 year old; so I never knew what they were looking at??? Now when I am admired, I am flattered. When I am older and guys aren't looking at me in that 'way' I'll probably wish they were. Link to comment
brando Posted June 25, 2006 Share Posted June 25, 2006 i guess it is equal to younger women dating older guys because they have money.... Link to comment
ElektraHere Posted June 25, 2006 Share Posted June 25, 2006 i guess it is equal to younger women dating older guys because they have money.... Thats quite the generalization isnt it? Link to comment
mystik Posted June 25, 2006 Share Posted June 25, 2006 i guess it is equal to younger women dating older guys because they have money.... What does this have to do with anything? The original post was about how uncomfortable and awkward a younger female felt when obviously older men looked at them. It's okay because other younger females "use" older men? Link to comment
Dako Posted June 25, 2006 Share Posted June 25, 2006 If your flame suit is all zipped up, I’ll start I don’t quite understand what you meant by that? The way I understand it, you are even more into young women than you were when you were young? Not only that you admire their sexual attractiveness, bat more… Am I right? I admire a young woman just as I admire older ones. They have charm, grace, wit and intelligence. When I was young, girls my age were a puzzle to me. I didn't see much beyound their appearance and scorn for me. Don't misunderstand me, I like women, even older ones. At my age, I appreciate lots of things in life I took for granted in my youth: art, language, nature, friendship, etc. Why do you feel protective? I dunno, I just do. Is it possible to tell me what those other ways are? Not easily. I guess there's no defense for me. Link to comment
TheRedQueen Posted June 25, 2006 Share Posted June 25, 2006 Yeah Daddy Dako, why do you feel protective? Link to comment
brando Posted June 25, 2006 Share Posted June 25, 2006 Actually Dako, I don't think women today need many forms of protection.. they are very capable of handling themselves. In all arenas of life. I guess in a physical situation if a damsel is in distress, a knight in armor coming to her defense is ok..(and i am not trying to be a sexist), it is the one way though i can think of how you would answer the question of being protective of women. Link to comment
mystik Posted June 25, 2006 Share Posted June 25, 2006 I am 42 now and find all guys around me looking and commenting on girls aged 18-20. They are all 45-50 and they don't see anything wrong with that. I find this a bit disgusting. Am I the only one who feels this way? I would really like to know what other people think about it – especially older men and younger women. Any thoughts? I don't think it's disgusting that they find younger woman attractive and comment on it. I am a 21 year old female who has worked in an ALL male (ratio of 30:1) environment for the last three summers *current one too. I've basically heard it all. What I have found is that they comment on all females. They look at any female form that walks by and will comment on any of them if they are "hot", have large breasts, or are dressed in a *slutty* way that would provoke them to make such comments. I work on a large university campus and obviously this includes younger women too. What I've also found is that they respect me. Though they oogle and comment on young women my age every second of the day, they never say anything to me. They also apologize if something really inappropriate slips out and they remember that I am also in the truck. To me, it really just is guy talk. They don't really sit and talk during break about their feelings, goals, what they're going to do during the weekend...and when there are women all over campus, why not talk about them? The only time I have encountered an uncomfortable situation was a few days ago: Another summer worker, a 43 year old recent divorcee asked the ONE other female student I work with, to go upstairs with him. He asked her if she wanted to continue the conversation "upstairs where it is quieter" when we ALWAYS sit outside during break with EVERYONE. HE asked her two days in a row (she is 22). Then the other day I told him what I did in Vegas, which included seeing a Burlesque show. He then asked me why I would do that, and was it because I got aroused by it? I was astounded by his question. Anyway, point is, we ended up telling other people we work with what he said and they were all disgusted. None of the other 35-55 old men I worked with thought that was appropriate at all, and insisted that we told him stopped it and that if he continued, to file a harassment suit against him. I guess I'm just trying to say that men no matter how old they are, will appreciate women. Same goes the other way I think. Just so long as they don't cross the line I don't think it's a big deal. Sorry for this being so long! Link to comment
ElektraHere Posted June 25, 2006 Share Posted June 25, 2006 Actually Dako, I don't think women today need many forms of protection.. they are very capable of handling themselves. In all arenas of life. I guess in a physical situation if a damsel is in distress, a knight in armor coming to her defense is ok..(and i am not trying to be a sexist), it is the one way though i can think of how you would answer the question of being protective of women. I think that Dako is saying it as a gentleman not that he will be a savior to someone. If I were being harassed by some men in a bar and you or Dako were there. I would really appreciate if he were to speak up and not let me "fend for myself." Sometimes the "saving" is not the knight on the white horse scenario it can be just someone being kind. Plus isnt this thread on how older men oogle younger women?? Link to comment
Dako Posted June 25, 2006 Share Posted June 25, 2006 Brando, I respect your views and agree except for one thing. Your post starts with "I think" but I was writing "I feel." Feminism isn't lost on me, and I've never subscribed to the weak woman strong man routine. I've had enough friends who stretch gender roles to know better. Warm in my flame suit...think I'll leave it on. Link to comment
ElektraHere Posted June 25, 2006 Share Posted June 25, 2006 Brando, I respect your views and agree except for one thing. Your post starts with "I think" but I was writing "I feel." Feminism isn't lost on me, and I've never subscribed to the weak woman strong man routine. I've had enough friends who stretch gender roles to know better. Warm in my flame suit...think I'll leave it on. You can take it off Dako I think you are safe in here ;-) Link to comment
CarnelianButterfly Posted June 25, 2006 Share Posted June 25, 2006 You can take it off Dako I think you are safe in here ;-) WOOHOO Dako strip tease!!!! Link to comment
oldflam3 Posted June 25, 2006 Author Share Posted June 25, 2006 Hey, lighten up! I just wanted to hear other peoples' opinion and perhaps modify my own. My intention was not to touch on feminism or any other 'big' issues. Sorry if I sounded aggressive. I didn't want to change the world, just to understand it a little bit better. Link to comment
itsallgrand Posted June 25, 2006 Share Posted June 25, 2006 Hey, lighten up! I just wanted to hear other peoples' opinion and perhaps modify my own. My intention was not to touch on feminism or any other 'big' issues. Sorry if I sounded aggressive. I didn't want to change the world, just to understand it a little bit better. Awww. I was enjoying the show. Three cheers for the men who posted here. Link to comment
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