Question about CHEATING

[hope123]

Hi everyone,

 

i was just wondering what people thought about this. Do you think if someone is cheating, it always comes out in the end?--one way or another--finding out by mistakes, the other person not covering their tracks well etc.

 

Do you place your full trust in someone because you love them and also believe if they were doing something wrong, sooner or later it would come out?? I read so many posts about being cheated on, even in marriages that have lasted for 10 years for example and it influences me i think. I have only been with my b/f a year--people are married for many more years than that and have a larger history together and still cheat. I just don't understand how a person can do this to one they married or said they were exclusive with. I actually hope if temptation did come my b/f's way--he would break up with me before cheated on me. I think its one of the worst things done to people and i'm afraid of it happening to me no matter who i am with.

[itsallgrand]

I do have faith that cheaters are almost always found out. They leave signs, or they make mistakes in clear up/bsing, or their character shows itself with some time.

 

My opinion okay - a lot of people look the other way or don't want to see the cheater for what he/she is. They ignore, then act so surprised when it happens. Sure, sometimes it is out of the blue and never could be known to the person.

But people have a way of showing themselves even when they are wearing masks.

 

And, when it comes down to it, for those that get cheated on: You survive. People are strong. It is possible to live on and love even if you have been cheated on (but ya might just pick another person to share your love with lol).

[Tigris]

There's no point in worrying about something that might never happen.

 

Lots of people end up cheating because their marriages are having problems. This doesn't mean only in the bedroom. Most of the time it's problems that arise from everyday situations, e.g. the husband/wife not giving the other one help with paying bills, debts, household chores, making decisions, helping with the children, not having family holidays, etc. Then it tends to progress to the sex department. Sometimes one of them will think 'there's no way I'm having sex with him/her tonight after the way I've been treated today......'

 

A marriage/relationship is supposed to be 50/50 all the way. If it isn't then the chances are the marriage won't work. That's why both my marriages didn't work! My husbands' weren't shouldering their share of the problems and leaving it all to me to do. Eventually (in my last marriage) I couldn't handle the stress any longer and started to self harm. On two occasions I nearly committed suicide. I ended up on meds and seeing a psychiatrist.

 

Cheaters do eventually give themselves away!

[yeawutever]

It's almost always found out b/c they make it so obvious. Ok I'm not advocating cheating in no way, it's so low, but if they insist on cheating, they would have to think carefully about it and do it in a smart, calculating way. Ex: See the schedule of when you coming home, don't cheat at home which is most obvious you will find out, don't let the SO see what he/she was watsing money on, etc.

 

But at the end, that's a lot of work and the cheater will not fully cover their tracts, it will be found out.

My question here "Why are you worrying that your b/f might cheat, has he in the past?? If not, has he been sneaky or acting weird??

[ricardo]

I would venture to give a qualified "yes" to whether or not cheaters eventually get caught. Last year I found out about my wife cheating 36 years ago. It is amazing what can eventualy float to the surface.

[rebel_star89]

Not you don't freaking make it soooooooo obviously then it's certainly never found out and if it is, it'll prollie take years. Either way, not good at all!!!!!!!

[OceanEyes]

If the person who cheats has an actual conscience, then YES, I do believe that it comes out naturally. Whether it comes out right away, or takes years to be found out, I do believe that it does.

 

I've had a girlfriend for 15 years who has cheated on her fiancee several times in the past 5-6 years. It's awful how she does it, but he's never suspected.

[Mysterious Gurl]

You probably will not appreciate my post at all, but I will give you my opinion from my experience.

 

I believe cheaters sooner or later eventually get caught. I was seeing a guy who I did fall in love with; and he had (and still has) a girlfriend of about four years with a one year old son.

 

At the time, I felt no guilt because even though it was wrong, it certainly felt right. We just clicked when we met. (I believe we did anyway) we just had an amazing connection between us that temptation finally gave way.

 

Anyway, I had a minor disagreement with him once, and I said I thought it was probably best we never carried on seeing each as 'more than' friends. As the idiot, I regretted my decision almost immediately because I missed the closeness of him.

 

Anyway, I sent him an e-mail late that night and told him I still "loved him". The bad part was, his girlfriend found his hotmail password and saw the e-mail.

 

The outcome was he just told her I had a crush on him to save our skins and she calmed down. Even after she almost blew our cover, we carried on.

 

It's more or less ended now. So yes, I believe cheaters get caught sooner or later.

 

Although, I must admit, I really miss him. I love him so much. Yet nothing can ever happen between us.

 

Miya xx

[yeawutever]

Yes, they are sonner or later caught, thought there might be a few cases in which they can carry on two lives where the SO never even suspects. If they wanna cheat (it is wrong) then they would have to look at the schedule, not cheat at home where it's likely they'll get caught, make sure no one else knows the SO, erase all e-mails right that day, never write in a letter and when calling never leave a message, dial *67 after making the call. Never use the excuse "Oh the traffic was late", it's a very lame one and you could easily get caught in the lie and far more stuff.

 

Now see how all that is so complicated, that's another reason why you don't even wanna consider cheating in the first place.

[antionette0706]

It is in the bible somewhere...... What's done in the dark shall surely come to light...

[xprincessbugx]

When most people are cheating and they never get caught eventually they will get careless and slip up. I think even if the partner they are with doesnt catch them, someone in the future will b.c. it all has to do with karma

[AntiLove_SuperStar]

I was never caught, and I've cheated more in 2 years than most people ever do in a lifetime.

 

I would end up confessing though, just because I'd feel sorry for my significant other at the time.

 

I am now faithful, hoorah!

[jchan]

Sometimes it makes you wonder what would have happened if you had cheated on your partner, before they cheated on you as opposed to being the only one that was hurt. I wonder what would happen to a relationship like that?

 

would it strengthen the relationship, or would it ultimately destroy it?