What should I say to my best friend?

[Capricorn3]

3 hours ago, LootieTootie said:

I say that above BUT I also think your friend is very selfish and only thinking of her needs. You're the one who just had a baby and dealing with a dying loved one for Petes sake. I think this friend is showing her true colors and she is someone best to demote to an acquittance.

^ I agree.

[catfeeder]

My heart goes out to you, Tiny, and I'm so sorry about your Dad. 

I think given all that you're dealing with, the last thing I'd put up with is a friend, no matter how close, who has picked NOW to decide that I should jump through hoops to appease her.

I'd allow any silent treatments from friend to run their course--or not--without any influence from me. If she were to contact me with complaints, I'd tell her that I adore her and hope that she will decide at some point to view my performance at this time through a gentler lens.  I have responsibilities to help my Mom and my family through palliative care arrangements and funeral decisions on top of caring for an infant, and I just don't have the bandwidth to perform to her standards right now.

Either she'll be willing to grapple with this and come out the other side with an awareness that you can't revolve around her at this moment, or not. If not, I wouldn't consider the bridge to be burned, but rather, I'd make room for the idea that if she's ever capable of being a good friend again, then someday she'll 'get it' and let you know.

Holding you and your family in my thoughts,
Cat