Felling very limited in sex

[score123]

hey! 

I just feel like I need any advice regarding sex.  I feel very egoistic in bed. I enjoy what we do in bed with this guy, I like the beginning part, foreplay and so on, it gets us both very excited, but I have an orgasm in the first 3 minutes after foreplay and that's it, I need to sleep after it and relax...  I don't need that much stimulation, I don't need penetration actually, and if we start penetration I get bored of it in a couple of minutes and I just go for the orgasm and that's it. So that's the awkward moment where I have been satisfied, but he not yet, and I just need to sleep, I feel like I am not making any effort to satisfy him too afterwards, but I cannot fake, I just feel like I get very tired after it.

I don't like giving, nor taking bj or handjobs (I just make an effort to give him the second sometimes but it is just mechanical, I really get no satisfaction from it after I have had an orgasm). I enjoy my orgasms though, so I am not asexual. I just don't enjoy getting stimulation after an orgasm and nor continuing the stimulation,,, I just want to relax

Any idea for how can I improve this? I feel a bit like my sexual life is going to be very limited, cause I get an orgasm in 3 minutes and after it I just want to sleep. ,,,I really feel very limited to this 😞

Thanks

[Wiseman2]

17 minutes ago, score123 said:

I enjoy what we do in bed with this guy

How is the relationship in general? Are these hookups or are you dating? How long have you known him?

It sounds like quick mechanical release and not really interesting or passionate lovemaking.

How old is he? Is he a good lover in general?

Sounds like you're too tired, having sex too late, sleepy or exhausted. You could also be out of shape or unable to multi-orgasm.

A better relationship, better setting better time of  evening and better fitness level may help.

 

[score123]

thanks for the advice. I am in great shape actually. The guy is a great person and a great lover. we are dating for plenty of months now. I just think that I am confusing because I really like him, but not in a sexual way, maybe more like  a friend. So that may be something, but my worry is what if my system works just like this, I just have an orgasm really soon and thats it. They say everybody is different, so maybe thats how it is for me. Is that even possible?

[tattoobunnie]

Masturbate before you date, or you aren't going to go in 3 minutes.  Then drink coffee before the date too.  Whether it's fun or not for you, give him oral or petting till he's close, then go in for the main event, so you finish close together.

[DancingFool]

So maybe switch it up a bit. More foreplay on him by you and less on you so you don't get so excited and orgasm so fast and so he comes a bit faster. There is such a thing as overdoing it on foreplay and by the time you get to actual sex, it's kind of done and over with.

Also, be sure that you talk to him about it. Most guys think that lasting long is for you, when in reality it's not always the case. Be sure he knows that you prefer it faster rather than longer. Might be a relief for both of you in a way.

[Batya33]

I think if you were more into him as a person and/or in love with him you wouldn't be this focused on your orgasm.  

[Coily]

Have you tried for multiple orgasms, or are you just done/exhausted after the first?

I have to agree with others you need to do more foreplay on him, are there other ways you can enjoyably stimulate him beyond BJs and HJs? Also a general health check maybe in order with a physician?

Another thought, how long do you rest afterwards? If it's not fully falling asleep, you could consider round 2.