What's the point of being strong?

[Lovelavie]

These days I heard from a friend with tears in her eyes "You don't seem to suffer from love, you are so strong, I wish I were like you"

 

I can't get that scene out of my head. I told her my heart bleeds, I told her I do suffer and it hurts like hell. But I cope with it, I live with it. But if you ask me if I'm happy with this situation, hell no, I'm not. How do you cope with trying to tell yourself that it's not your fault you couldn't make the man you loved love you back. How do you cope with telling yourself that you are good enough and not let the fact that he's happy with someone else f*ck up your self esteem. How do you tell yourself everyday that you are worthy when you see everyone that made you suffer be happy with someone else and you´re stuck trying to be the best you can but nothing seems to come out of it. What's the point of being strong, what´s the point of holding it all together when everyday your world seems to be falling apart and you try to tell yourself it will be ok, something good will come out of this?

 

I don't want a relationship, I'm happy single, I just don't want my heart to break anymore. I've had enough. I've had enough dealing with people not having 1% of the consideration I have for them. I have a friend of mine who is in love with me and I told him straight away I did not want to get involved. I could use him when I'm needy, I could use him when I'm sad. But I just can't, that's not part of who I am.

 

I am so very happy with everything in my life, my friends, family, my plans for the future. But my heart hurts, and I don't know when it will stop. This is destroying me...

[Annia]

These days I heard from a friend with tears in her eyes "You don't seem to suffer for love, you are so strong, I wish I were like you"

 

I can't get that scene out of my head. I told her my heart bleeds, I told her I do suffer and it hurts like hell. But I cope with it, I live with it. But if you ask me if I'm happy with this situation, hell no, I'm not. How do you cope with trying to tell yourself that it's not your fault you couldn't make the man you loved love you back. How do you cope with telling yourself that you are good enough and not let the fact that he's happy with someone else f*ck up your self esteem. How do you tell yourself everyday that you are worthy when you see everyone that made you suffer be happy with someone else and you´re stuck trying to be the best you can but nothing seems to come out of. What's the point of being strong, what´s the point of holding it all together when everyday your world seems to be falling apart and you try to tell yourself it will be ok, something good will come out of this?

 

I don't want a relationship, I'm happy single, I just don't want my heart to break anymore. I've had enough. I've had enough dealing with people not having 1% of the consideration I have for them. I have a friend of mine who is in love with me and I told him straight away I did not want to get involved. I could use him when I'm needy, I could use him when I'm sad. But I just can't, that's not part of who I am.

 

I am so very happy with everything in my life, my friends, family, my plans for the future. But my heart hurts, and I don't know when it will stop. This is destroying me...

 

I can for sure relate with that feeling. I think the point of being strong is that pushing through heartbreak pain will take us to somewhere better while wallowing on it and giving up won't. It's hard, it hurts but we're the only person who can heal ourselves. If people who hurt us get some sort of "karma" or "consequence" of it, it's not our responsibility. It's hard and I had to also come to terms with it so I could move on.

[Hollyj]

I am so glad you are done with that jerk. Now, work on you, to understand why you were in that situation.

[Lovelavie]

TBH this has been an ok ride for me, I went from admiring him like I had never admired one before to completely despising him. Been almost 50 days NC and heard from a friend that he was bad mouthing me these days to him. I sent him a text asking him to stop talking about me and he denied it and was super rude to me.

 

Also a friend of mine who is close friends to him texted me today saying he is disappointed in me with some attitudes I had but didn't tell me what it was which really irritated me.

 

Wow, if liking someone and admiring someone is bad than I wonder what good is. Also I have been absent from anything that involve them and they still talk about me and won't leave me at peace. It just makes me feel angrier and won't let me move on.

[Hollyj]

Don't reach out to him again. As you can see, it is futile

 

In all honesty, you should not be surprised. He treated you like absolute garbage the majority of the time you engaged.

 

Please learn from this.

[Honeycomb8]

Everyone goes through crap. Hell I've been through a lot of devastating moments. You just learn not to dwell on it and let it go. Don't wallow in sorrow, it doesn't change a thing and the negativity can be suffocating.

[Wiseman2]

The best way for you to heal is to not drag out the drama and hostility. Instead, go no contact and delete and block him and All his people from all messaging platforms and social media.

 

You can not put a gag order on freedom of speech, so don't waste your time on that. Ask yourself why this "friend" or "they" even relayed this negative info to stir the pot. If "they" are all deleted and blocked it would stop eating at you about whatever they think or say. And who cares what "they" or he say and do?

heard from a friend that he was bad mouthing me these days to him. I sent him a text asking him to stop talking about me and he denied it and was super rude to me. ...they still talk about me and won't leave me at peace.