8 weeks of no contact and not one word from ex-bf :(

[K8i12]

Hey,

I looked to PM you as I'm in a similar position however it won't let me!

 

You're definitely not alone though and it's so hard but like others have said right now it's probably the best decision and has hard as it is you can't lower your standards of the commitment you want no matter how hard it is and how long you have been together ! It's something that I've come to realise and it does get easier 😊 sometimes you've got to realise what it is truly YOU want and if that's commitment in the form of marriage and children but your ex isn't at that stage then either take the time alone to better yourself and do things for YOU and you'll either rekindle at the right time or you'll find someone whose at that stage 😊.

 

I'm sure he cares more than you know but he can't be selfish and contact you when he knows he can't give you what you want / deserve right now x

[carolyn436]

Hey,

I looked to PM you as I'm in a similar position however it won't let me!

 

You're definitely not alone though and it's so hard but like others have said right now it's probably the best decision and has hard as it is you can't lower your standards of the commitment you want no matter how hard it is and how long you have been together ! It's something that I've come to realise and it does get easier 😊 sometimes you've got to realise what it is truly YOU want and if that's commitment in the form of marriage and children but your ex isn't at that stage then either take the time alone to better yourself and do things for YOU and you'll either rekindle at the right time or you'll find someone whose at that stage 😊.

 

I'm sure he cares more than you know but he can't be selfish and contact you when he knows he can't give you what you want / deserve right now x

 

Hi K8i12. I think I can't send/receive PMs because I'm new here. Did you also recently break up with your ex due to different goals?

 

It's now week 9 of no contact and I don't feel any better, especially since Thanksgiving is coming up and my ex-bf and I used to always drive to his parents house and spend the week there.

I miss him so much and just wish to hear at least one word from him to know that I did mean something to him. The silence is killing me. I have this strong urge to reach out but I know nothing good will come from it. Why can't he just reach out once at least? He was adamant about keeping in touch as he thinks we will might have a future together when he becomes ready but ever since I went NC, it's just been this horrible silence.

[ThatwasThen]

He was adamant about keeping in touch as he thinks we will might have a future together when he becomes ready

He's moving on and going no contact is THE way to get over someone. Stop hoping he contacts you and just get on with your life and learning the new normal. The new normal is you and him no longer a unit.

 

You are stagnating yourself from getting to the stage of indifference to him and that means you're going to continue to not feel any better. Don't make your pain your best friend (that is what you are currently doing while wallowing in your hope that he contacts you).

 

Make new plans for Thanksgiving and begin your 'new normal.'

[Jan2728]

I'm in this situation too, but maybe getting over it quicker as it was a shorter relationship. I do believe he's respecting you by not contacting you, as much as that hurts. Stay strong. He may surprise you. These things can be unpredictable.

But it is always best to have a moving on mindset as you will not forget what you want IF you do hear from him rather than have the relationship on his terms. Sending love I know this hurts , I'm hurting too. ❤