Jack3 Posted October 25, 2017 Share Posted October 25, 2017 So my boyfriend and I have been together for 6 years. I met him when I was on my summer break between my Freshman and Sophomore years of college. I ended up coming home from college and finishing my degree online so that I could be with him. So I've sacrificed a bit for this relationship. In the beginning, like most couples, things started out great. He was exciting, and we were both in love. I thought about him constantly, and I would never dream of being with anyone else. He's always had temper problems, however, he doesn't quite understand that when he speaks to me a certain way, it really affects the way I feel about not only myself, but our relationship. I'll give you guys an example. The most recent one that I have. The other day, I had misplaced my keys and needed to use his spare so that I could get back to work. I took his Key Fob and went to work. I returned the fob to him the next day, and today he was looking for it. He messaged me while I was at work and asked "where is the f****** Fob at?" I told him that it was in the house somewhere, and to look in a couple different spots. I asked him where he was going, and whether I could help him by picking something up on my way home for lunch. He stated something like "No stupid, I told you I had F****** things to do, you stupid idiot". I let that roll off me, as I am quite used to these types of insults now. I just let him know that I would help him when I got home. He then stated "no, F*** you. I don't need your help". Something like that. So now to my question/need for advice. I have told him in the past that when he says things like that it really hurts me. It really does, although as I stated I've gotten used to it... Anyway, he just says that if I really believe that he says those things and means them, then we shouldn't be together, because he's told me time and time again that he does NOT mean the awful things he says (by the way, his average insult/day ratio is probably at least 5/day of calling me stupid, , idiot, etc.). So what do I do? Keep living this way, and let him speak to me knowing in my heart that he doesn't mean it? Or should I break up with him? I really don't want to break up. I've invested SO much time and energy into this relationship. Not to mention, we have both moved away from our families together and have created this life up here with multiple pets. I have no friends, and I would be completely alone trying to figure out what in the hell to do with myself for the first time in almost 7 years.. It scares me so much to be single, and I just don't know if I could EVER find the strength to say goodbye to him. I don't want to make it seem like I'm some sort of saint in this relationship. I've done my share of hurtful things, however, I've repented for them countlessly, and have mended my ways for good. I will NEVER make the mistakes that I have in the past EVER again with anyone. I have learned a lot in this relationship. He has trust issues, which is fair enough, and sometimes I get the feeling that, because of the BS I caused, and the BS he's gone through in his past, he will never fully trust me, but I do still want to try... Any advice is really, truly helpful. Thank you all in advance. Link to comment
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