Should I date in college?

[ShyGuy51]

Everyone knows that college is the highlight of your life, your finally alone from your family and free and able to do whatever you want. The problem though is whether or not I should date while in college. The problem is that I was never really interested in dating while in highschool, so I just never did it (Sure the girls were pretty, but they all had boyfriends already so i just never bothered). But now I'm in college and I'm starting to get interested in girls and dating, but I don't know if I should. Partly because I have no experience with dating so I don't know how to ask a girl out, or if I should ask them on a date before being my girlfriend or vice versa. So one problem is that I just don't know what to even do, the other problem is that I don't know if I have time. I'm taking 15 credit hours, so im a full time student, and then I'm in clubs almost every night and I get tons of homework from a couple of my professors. So should a guy like me even bother asking a girl out? There's defiantly a girl who I'm interested in, although I don't know if she's interested in me. So the question is whether or not I should date while in college, or should I wait until I go out in the work force?

[Seraphim]

I met my husband at university.

[Snny]

I married my college sweetheart, and he did not date anyone else before me. He had a slight language and culture barrier and was a former ESL student.

 

Quite frankly, high school relationships have a very slim chance of lasting. Kids are very immature and it won't be adequate experience for dating as an adult. You should not lose sleep over it. High school is very overrated.

 

Something to consider: College might be your last opportunity to meet and date new people. Start taking advantage of it now. Not going to lie... it gets challenging to make friends or date people once you start your career because social opportunities for adults becomes limited. Most people get married right after college and begin trying for a family- they do not have time to mingle frequently compared to college. I got a couple of friends who are established in their careers and want to date, but they are having a very difficult time because their jobs are incredibly demanding AND there's not many women looking for dating within their age.

 

Your issue is time management between social and work. You have to figure out a way to balance them. Keep a calendar and start marking due dates for assignments, then plan out social time. Go to a variety of clubs, volunteer, OR make an effort to get together with your classmates (which is how I met my husband).

[Careerchoice]

but they all had boyfriends already so i just never bothered).

 

They did not all have boyfriends. Some of them were single. You have to train yourself out of this mindset, otherwise you will keep talking yourself out of hitting on girls.

 

I don't know how to ask a girl out, or if I should ask them on a date before being my girlfriend or vice versa.

 

Start small and just worry about going up to and talking to girls for now.

 

the other problem is that I don't know if I have time. I'm taking 15 credit hours, so im a full time student,

 

That's not a lot. Not too many to have an active social/dating life.

 

and then I'm in clubs almost every night

 

Hit on girls in the clubs or cut that down so you can do things and go places with girls around. Hanging out with a bunch of guys won't get you dates.

 

and I get tons of homework from a couple of my professors.

 

With 15 credits, you don't get so much hw that you can't date. Don't make excuses.

 

So should a guy like me even bother asking a girl out? There's defiantly a girl who I'm interested in, although I don't know if she's interested in me. So the question is whether or not I should date while in college, or should I wait until I go out in the work force?

 

If you wait until you get into the workforce, you'll have the same excuse; "I'm working all the time." Start learning now. This is a skill that can be learned like any other. Google PUA and you'll find people who teach this stuff.

[rosephase]

If college is the highlight of your life you are doing a lot of things wrong. If you peak out before you reach 22? Dude... whoever gave you that idea has not had a full life.

 

Have fun. Work hard. Play hard. Learn a lot about yourself. Dating is a part of that.

[pippy longstocking]

I didn't go to college sweetheart and I can assure I have had many highlights ...make your toes curl if I told you

[ShyGuy51]

If college is the highlight of your life you are doing a lot of things wrong. If you peak out before you reach 22? Dude... whoever gave you that idea has not had a full life.

 

Have fun. Work hard. Play hard. Learn a lot about yourself. Dating is a part of that.

 

Yea, your right, I should spend my time having fun and enjoying things other than college. I need to get experience and make memories.

 

I didn't go to college sweetheart and I can assure I have had many highlights ...make your toes curl if I told you

 

I don't know what your talking about, but ok.

[ShyGuy51]

I can talk to girls fine.... I just don't know how to ask them out. Like I said, I don't understand how dating works. I watch a lot of anime, and in them I see guys ask girls out and they become boyfriend and girlfriend like that and go on dates. But some people tell me to go on dates first before asking them out.

[ShyGuy51]

I married my college sweetheart, and he did not date anyone else before me. He had a slight language and culture barrier and was a former ESL student.

 

Quite frankly, high school relationships have a very slim chance of lasting. Kids are very immature and it won't be adequate experience for dating as an adult. You should not lose sleep over it. High school is very overrated.

 

Something to consider: College might be your last opportunity to meet and date new people. Start taking advantage of it now. Not going to lie... it gets challenging to make friends or date people once you start your career because social opportunities for adults becomes limited. Most people get married right after college and begin trying for a family- they do not have time to mingle frequently compared to college. I got a couple of friends who are established in their careers and want to date, but they are having a very difficult time because their jobs are incredibly demanding AND there's not many women looking for dating within their age.

 

Your issue is time management between social and work. You have to figure out a way to balance them. Keep a calendar and start marking due dates for assignments, then plan out social time. Go to a variety of clubs, volunteer, OR make an effort to get together with your classmates (which is how I met my husband).

 

Yea, you have a good point. I should try to meet new people and at least attempt to date someone. I know that a lot of my cousins are adults and have trouble finding dates, so I should take this opportunity to try to learn new things. I would get a calendar, but I don't have any money.... college makes me broke. xD

[agent1607307371]

I should date while in college, or should I wait until I go out in the work force?

 

You will never be surrounded by so many people of the same age and circumstances than you will while at college. It will only get harder to meet people once you get out into the workplace.

 

Also, if you feel you don't know how to date now, you will still feel that way once you're older. Don't put so much weight on it. Treat people with respect, but understand that this is all practise.

[Snny]

I would get a calendar, but I don't have any money.... college makes me broke. xD

So make one. I do it all the time for work. There are FREE printable calendars online. Costs you nothing to print it out at your campus.

 

Also don't you have a phone? Use a calendar app.

[ShyGuy51]

So if I wanted to ask a girl to go on a date with me, what is the best way to do that, and where? And is there anywhere specific that would be good to go on a date?

[pippy longstocking]

I don't know what your talking about, but ok.

 

my point was, it is only your opinion that college is the highlight of life !

[Batya33]

my point was, it is only your opinion that college is the highlight of life !

 

Yes- I loved a lot about college but I didn't live away from home for most of it. I was pretty much free to do lots of things I wanted to do before I went to college so that didn't change much. College is a great way to meet people and often to make lifelong friends, and date - you're all there, you all have college in common, etc.

 

I think a great way to meet people in college is to volunteer backstage in the school's theatrical productions.

[mustlovedogs]

You shouldn't overthink it so much. Use college as a time for personal growth. Try new things, explore hobbies and clubs, take classes that interest you outside your major, do things that make you nervous... if dating opportunities come up, take them, but focus on personal growth first. That will lead to dating opportunities.

[ShyGuy51]

Yes- I loved a lot about college but I didn't live away from home for most of it. I was pretty much free to do lots of things I wanted to do before I went to college so that didn't change much. College is a great way to meet people and often to make lifelong friends, and date - you're all there, you all have college in common, etc.

 

I think a great way to meet people in college is to volunteer backstage in the school's theatrical productions.

 

I was actually thinking of doing that this year. I was thinking I'd try joining the drama club and acting in the play, or at the very least end up working backstage.

[ShyGuy51]

You shouldn't overthink it so much. Use college as a time for personal growth. Try new things, explore hobbies and clubs, take classes that interest you outside your major, do things that make you nervous... if dating opportunities come up, take them, but focus on personal growth first. That will lead to dating opportunities.

 

Well, for me dating is trying a new thing. I'll focus on personal growth first though. But how will I know if a dating opportunity shows up?

[mustlovedogs]

Well, for me dating is trying a new thing. I'll focus on personal growth first though. But how will I know if a dating opportunity shows up?

 

This is why you need to try new experiences. If you feel attracted to someone and they seem like they could be attracted to you, ask them out.

[ShyGuy51]

This is why you need to try new experiences. If you feel attracted to someone and they seem like they could be attracted to you, ask them out.

 

Alright, I'll keep that in mind.

[Batya33]

I was actually thinking of doing that this year. I was thinking I'd try joining the drama club and acting in the play, or at the very least end up working backstage.

 

Front stage is great -backstage from what I've seen takes a lot of skill and talent (I was more of a frontstage person and lack the backstage skills!)