Crushing on my boyfriend's friend

[Lonelylenol]

Recently, I have been hanging out a lot with my boyfriend and his friends. I can't help but notice that one of his friends seem to "care" about what's going on with me compared to the rest of his friends. Most of them would ignore the things I'd say or just wouldn't care at all. But with this one specific friend, he would actually listen and respond to me...

 

List of scenarios that had happened:

 

- I tripped during a normal walk with all of them and everyone else just asked if I was okay but THAT friend went out of the way to help me up. Even my boyfriend didn't do that.

 

- We were playing drinking games and I was pouring everyone drinks and he stood close to me that every time I'd reach over to grab the cups to pour drinks, my leg would brush up against his arm/hand. Normally, wouldn't the guy move out of the way the first time it happened? He kinda just stood there and let it happen about 4-5x in a row.

 

- I notice that he would always try and include me in all of their conversations. And he would notice the little things I do that the rest don't notice. Like he would notice me looking sleepy, tired, etc.

 

I just don't know what to do. His friend is making me feel some type of way... Gives me butterflies just simply thinking about him. But it pains me to know that he's my boyfriend's friend and I'm not single so I can't really act on it. But I also know that I am not his type (we talked about what we like/don't like with everyone before) so does this mean that maybe he's just a nice guy in general? And that I'm taking this the wrong way?

 

PS. I'm attracted to him the most because of the way he treats his parents. My current boyfriend is the exact opposite. And you know what they say, pick a man who treats their mother with respect because that's how they'll treat you.

[DanZee]

Well, he seems like a nice guy. Keep him in mind when you break up with your boyfriend.

[MissCanuck]

Forget the friend. Nothing good will come of that, take my word for it. Let's say you became single - it's highly unlikely this friend would pursue anything with you, and if he did, it almost certainly would not end well.

 

Instead, ask yourself why you're still with your boyfriend. You are apparently quite checked out of your relationship - why is that?

[Capricorn3]

Forget the friend. Nothing good will come of that, take my word for it. Let's say you became single - it's highly unlikely this friend would pursue anything with you, and if he did, it almost certainly would not end well.

 

Instead, ask yourself why you're still with your boyfriend. You are apparently quite checked out of your relationship - why is that?

 

I second this post. When reading your previous thread, and now this one, it seems you're not very happy with your current boyfriend and now you seek attention elsewhere. That's your sign that things are not working and you should reconsider your relationship (imo).

[Andrina]

I'm not saying the friend is doing anything inappropriate, but lets say any guy who would flirt with a taken woman and send her serious signals he wanted something more, then that's a guy who lacks integrity and actually doesn't want a serious, long term relationship with her. He pursues someone who really can't be his, and if she made steps to be his alone, he would dump her. It's a skewed psychological game.

 

I agree with the other posters. If you're really crushing on someone else to this extent, it's time to dump the bf, who doesn't meet your needs. This will free you to be single when someone better comes along, but it won't be one of your bf's friends. Those boundaries shouldn't be crossed. You wouldn't like it if your gf dated an ex of yours, would you? I know I'd never do that to a friend. It's called having good ethics and respecting that friendship.

[Ziggy123]

No. Just no, even if you break up his friends are off limits imo