Going backwards ?

[JoeyD2000]

Oh here we go again... another breakup!

 

I instigated the break up. From experience I didn't rush into this decision. I kept getting these feelings it wasn't meant to be. Something wasn't feeling right. Now those feelings of doubt are gone?

 

I love the girl & want her to be happy, it was a nice breakup compared to most. The circumstances are not permitting us to work. I felt at the time it was the best thing to do. It's been just over a week & i'm kinda regretting it. I know nothing has changed if I called her & spoke about us (again). If we got back together what has changed? Nothing

 

I suppose this is more of a vent as it's nice to hear some reassurance i've done the right thing. Like I said I love the girl & want her to be happy. I've sent one text since the split a few days ago, not about us just something light n cheerful, her reply was short.

 

I suppose the best thing to do is let her go n go no contact? I just feel she is not happy with me. We have been through a lot together & it's a shame our relationship is probably just going to fizzle out. I want to call her & ask if she is mad at me however is that going to get us anywhere?

 

I'm going to leave this to fate

 

Any advice appreciated

 

 

 

It's weird feeling i'm going through life now without her in it

[Keyman]

I feel that you have done the right thing. Life is about happiness and pursuing what makes us feel it. If something doesn't feel right, then that's our gut telling us that something probably isn't right.

 

And honestly, we only go backwards when we put the car in reverse. Everything else is a step forward in some sense, it might not be the right direction, but you'll learn from it and try another path.

 

It's going to be strange, pretty standard for a break up, but you'll live and grow and be better for it.

[rich46]

I suppose the best thing to do is let her go n go no contact? I just feel she is not happy with me. We have been through a lot together & it's a shame our relationship is probably just going to fizzle out. I want to call her & ask if she is mad at me however is that going to get us anywhere?

It is natural that she is hurting now, and probably upset with you, but these feelings will fade in time IF you leave her alone to grieve/heal in peace.

 

Keep pestering her with contact because you selfishly want to hold her back or make yourself feel better, then that will just prolong and increase the resentment she has towards you.

 

NC.

[JoeyD2000]

Thanks for your reply guys.

 

I know you are both correct.

 

Again I'm probably venting my thoughts. I wanted it to work for us & something wasn not feeling right. Damn frustrating. it's not like she is a bad person

[Keyman]

Again I'm probably venting my thoughts. I wanted it to work for us & something wasn not feeling right. Damn frustrating. it's not like she is a bad person

 

Unfortunately those are the hardest to let go.

[Wiseman2]

Are they both of your kids or her kids/your kids? If you don't share children then simply stop all contact and move on if she's already out there dating.

 

If they are both of your kids then communicate about that only. Focus on your kids and the future. Go forward not backward.

I'm still seeing my ex we have no issues with the chemistry/attraction. It's the situation. We live an hour drive from each other & the situation with our kids makes it difficult as well. They are our priority.She initiates contact 95% of the time & because I love her I always respond eventually..

[JoeyD2000]

Are they both of your kids or her kids/your kids? If you don't share children then simply stop all contact and move on if she's already out there dating.

 

If they are both of your kids then communicate about that only. Focus on your kids and the future. Go forward not backward.

 

 

 

Nope we have kids to other people.

 

No contact since i posted this. Don't like saying it however i'm pretty sure this is the right thing to do. I know it's pointless contacting her to see if she is ok.

 

 

Life hmmmm

[Dominique]

Nope we have kids to other people.

 

No contact since i posted this. Don't like saying it however i'm pretty sure this is the right thing to do. I know it's pointless contacting her to see if she is ok.

 

 

Life hmmmm

 

From the other side .... I can tell u.... As much as she may want to hear from you, it will break her heart to have idle chit chat with u. Or to have to make u feel better by assuring u she's not upset with u or angry with u. U ended things. Let her heal. She has to accept that she's wonderful and u love her but don't want her and ended it because u don't think she's right for you. That's enough to deal with without u texting or calling to see if she's mad and make u feel better. Let her heal. Maybe one day u can be friends and talk about it once some distance has healed both of u and u have both moved on.

[JoeyD2000]

Ha well I did cave in & contact her to she if she's ok!

 

As sad as it is it's all good between us. She's already started to date another guy lol 😂

 

To cut a long story short we wished each other the best 😌

[JoeyD2000]

It's all good with me I accept we are over however I noticed she posted on Facebook a quote "one day someone will walk into your life & make you realise why it wasn't meant to be with anyone else"

 

 

Personally I think it's a little tacky pretty much throwing it in my face now she is dating someone else. I'm not going to react.

 

My question is is seems to me that she must be hurting to post that knowing I'll eventually see it. I'd never consider doing that to her when I next meet someone out of respect.

 

All it has done for me has made it easier for me to move on.