Kenda Posted October 30, 2016 Share Posted October 30, 2016 Hi everyone! Me and my ex have broken up a long time ago but kept contact until 4 months ago. I told him the last time we texted to delete the photos that he has with me and has saved in his personal computer and files and wherever. He doesn't have social media so they aren't in there. It just bothers me that he still has them, I have deleted mine a long time ago. Before when we talked about it he kept saying they are his property. And he won't respond to tell me if he deleted them or not. I don't want him having photos of us together or of me anymore. There isn't something inappropriate in them; I just don't want him to have them anymore. Is it stupid to ask this of him? Link to comment
j.man Posted October 30, 2016 Share Posted October 30, 2016 Is it stupid to ask this of him?Probably against the TOS, so I won't say "stupid." But it's not a reasonable or intelligent request to make. We tend to be unreasonable when reeling from a breakup, so don't kick yourself too hard, but particularly if there's nothing inappropriate in the pictures, they're his to hold onto until he's 95 should he so desire. Link to comment
Capricorn3 Posted October 30, 2016 Share Posted October 30, 2016 And he won't respond to tell me if he deleted them or not. The problem here is that no matter if you request that he delete all photos, he can easily say "ok, done", but you'll never have proof if he really deleted them or not. He can lie. So, it's pointless really. Link to comment
JaggerJim Posted October 30, 2016 Share Posted October 30, 2016 It sounds like he broke up with you, and this is your punishment for him to delete the memories. Link to comment
Kenda Posted October 30, 2016 Author Share Posted October 30, 2016 No I broke up with him 2 times...because he was not honest and he wouldn't change his life style after everything we had been through. He doesn't deserve those memories. Since he told me the truth that he still has them, I'm thinking he'll tell the truth when he doesn't have them. Not inappropriate just close. He can use them against me. By the way the same people I asked about the pharmacy guy are writing here. I still haven't gone back to the pharmacy haha or contacted him again. The pharmacy thing is still a work in progress... Link to comment
Hermes Posted October 30, 2016 Share Posted October 30, 2016 "He can use them against me." Why would he want to do that, Kenda? In what kind of context? Link to comment
Kenda Posted October 30, 2016 Author Share Posted October 30, 2016 I'm not sure. We don't live in the US u know people here are a little more different. They judge more. Link to comment
Matt3939 Posted October 30, 2016 Share Posted October 30, 2016 Not that I keep anything at all from an ex specially pics. But I don't see how you could demand him to delete them. He can keep them however long he decides to. Link to comment
Hermes Posted October 30, 2016 Share Posted October 30, 2016 I don't live in the U.S. either Kenda. What do you mean by "more different". You will get judgmental people in the U.S. , and here, and on every continent. What would they be judging. You say the photos are not inappropriate. So what's the difficulty? Sounds all right. Link to comment
JaggerJim Posted October 30, 2016 Share Posted October 30, 2016 Don't you think it's time to move on. The pharmacy man didn't pan out and now your back to focusing on this. Maybe it's time to stop thinking about men and relationships for awhile. Link to comment
Kenda Posted October 30, 2016 Author Share Posted October 30, 2016 I don't live in the U.S. either Kenda. What do you mean by "more different". You will get judgmental people in the U.S. , and here, and on every continent. What would they be judging. You say the photos are not inappropriate. So what's the difficulty? Sounds all right. Kissing, holding hands, photos saying I love you ect ect... Link to comment
Capricorn3 Posted October 30, 2016 Share Posted October 30, 2016 Kissing, holding hands, photos saying I love you ect ect... What's wrong with that? Link to comment
Kenda Posted October 30, 2016 Author Share Posted October 30, 2016 I don't live in the U.S. either Kenda. What do you mean by "more different". You will get judgmental people in the U.S. , and here, and on every continent. What would they be judging. You say the photos are not inappropriate. So what's the difficulty? Sounds all right. Don't you think it's time to move on. The pharmacy man didn't pan out and now your back to focusing on this. Maybe it's time to stop thinking about men and relationships for awhile. I didn't work on the pharmacy thing anymore... I had been dealing with this photo thing all along just didn't mention it... Maybe it is nice not to deal with men for awhile and concentrate on my studies..maybe you are right... Link to comment
Hermes Posted October 30, 2016 Share Posted October 30, 2016 For cryin' out loud, Kenda!! Anhow, WHO would he be showing these photos to, assuming he were to do such a thing? You make it sound like he is going to publish the photos in the national press. Please don't tell me a couple cannot hold hands and kiss where you come from? And yes, I am aware of the various ethnicities where you are from........ Link to comment
Kenda Posted October 30, 2016 Author Share Posted October 30, 2016 What's wrong with that? Nothing is wrong with that...you guys aren't understanding what I want to say... Plus he doesn't deserve to keep them... Anyway he's never going to tell me or delete them I'll just have to deal with it He might still be bitter about us breaking up and I don't know sent them to my next boyfriend on purpose or something just to create problems or break us up Link to comment
Kenda Posted October 30, 2016 Author Share Posted October 30, 2016 We are very good people the people of Kosovo...I didn't want to say that but still not to the liberation level of the US Link to comment
j.man Posted October 30, 2016 Share Posted October 30, 2016 Nothing is wrong with that...you guys aren't understanding what I want to say...Yes, we do. And it's 100% irrational. Link to comment
Hermes Posted October 30, 2016 Share Posted October 30, 2016 "....and I don't know sent them to my next boyfriend on purpose or something". Could I recommend, Kenda, that you just stop ruminating about these photos and these unlikely and terrible scenarios. How and why would he know you have another boyfriend (assuming you get another boyfriend)? And secondly how ridiculous would he look sending those photos to another man? Think logically, Kenda!! What Capri was asking is (as I did) "what's wrong with people holding hands and kissing". Link to comment
Hermes Posted October 30, 2016 Share Posted October 30, 2016 LOL. Kenda. Where do you get this ideas about liberation (in the U.S. or anywhere else). Europe is far more liberated, in general. Holding hands and kissing! Not exactly the same as if you were banging someone stark naked in the street in broad daylight. I mean..... Link to comment
Kenda Posted October 30, 2016 Author Share Posted October 30, 2016 I have lived in the US for 7 years....they'll just be thought provoking... Of course nothing is wrong with kissing and doing that suff while in a relationship And if he wanted to find out about my next boyfriend he would...we share the same circle and how to contact him...social media and the internet has connected us in many ways Link to comment
Hermes Posted October 30, 2016 Share Posted October 30, 2016 I have livd in the US for 7 years.... And....? Link to comment
boltnrun Posted October 30, 2016 Share Posted October 30, 2016 So you are going to get a new boyfriend and your ex will somehow come up with this new boyfriend's contact info and send him pictures of you and him holding hands...and this is bad how? My mother used to tell me not to borrow trouble. You can imagine all kinds of scenarios. What if I walked out my front door and a piano fell on my head??? Why search for silly things to worry about? You can waste a lot of time worrying about things that might happen. Just remember, they might not happen as well. Link to comment
Hermes Posted October 30, 2016 Share Posted October 30, 2016 It would seem, Bolt, that holding hands with a man is out of bounds where Kenda comes from. And here we are well into 2016.... Link to comment
Kenda Posted October 30, 2016 Author Share Posted October 30, 2016 Oh no totally not...you see people kissing and holding hands in the streets everyday...but since he is my ex thats what is bothering me Link to comment
Hermes Posted October 30, 2016 Share Posted October 30, 2016 You are not making sense, Kenda. "but since he is my ex thats what is bothering me" Why so fixated on the ex? If there is nothing wrong with holding hands and kissing what does it matter if it is this ex or a hundred exes. Why would people judge YOU? If other people holding hands and/or kissing are not "judged2 why would it happen to you. Who EXACTLY are the people who would judge you. You need to level with us. Link to comment
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.