Saw ex boyfriends new girlfriend

[Lotusavx]

it has been over between us since last april. he tried all summer to get me back, and i kept breaking his heart by hurting myself by living a terrible lifestyle of excessive drinking and casual hook ups. i don't think i ever dealt properly with the pain of him leaving me, i just masked it by drinking and distracting myself. we ended up talking the other day and he told me about how he has this amazing new relationship. i saw a picture of her via facebook and she is very attractive. they seem perfect for each other. i can't help but be jealous and sad that we were so dysfunctional and they are really good together from what he has told me. i understand physically comparing to his new girlfriend is very toxic, but i know i am seeing her as more attractive than she might be (due to jealousy) how do i shake these feelings of sadness that they are better together than we ever were. we were together 4 years and they seem so perfect compared to how we ever were.

[limichelle]

Some people are just a better match. I know my first ex and I were a nightmare together. I'm sure he has found someone that suits him. So you can't look at it that there is anything wrong with you. You will find someone more suited to you then he ever was.

[Ms Darcy]

Some people are just a better match. I know my first ex and I were a nightmare together. I'm sure he has found someone that suits him. So you can't look at it that there is anything wrong with you. You will find someone more suited to you then he ever was.

 

I agree. Some people are better matches. You will find someone who is a better match for you too.

[ParisPaulette]

Because you need to realize that all new relationships are "perfect" no matter whether they are or aren't. And you two just didn't work and that's sometimes the case. Love isn't enough to make a good relationship, but really at the end of the day you have no idea if they'll stay together and be happy or not. Could be in another year you're in a great relationship and he's single and miserable or with her and miserable or with someone else and happy or.or.or.

 

You can't predict the future and you can't say they're better together, only that it's a new love and those all start out looking rosy and perfect. You both did too at one time and quite possibly there were exes around to say, "Look at those two, they're perfect together, how come we couldn't make it work?"

 

Comparing is useless, because time and circumstances are fluid and change is the only real constant there is. So realize if he can be happy with someone else you can too. But you can also be just as happy without someone else and you have a chance now to move forward, improve your life, learn from everything and move forward not tied down to a toxic relationship. You have more going for you than you realize.