If I can't find someone at 21, how can I find someone later?

[kurtosisapp]

I'm in my prime and I can't get guys i like to become interested in me. My standards are not high! I guess I'm just unattractive?

[Gloworm]

Dont give up! There are plenty of guys that probably feel unattractive too. Are you sure they arent interested? Maybe they are shy? Have you tried asking guys out?

[Scoe141]

I wouldn't sweat it too much. Things may change from now to when you're a bit older. Focus on you and doing your own thing. I remember when I was your age I didn't want a family, or kids. Now that I'm older, that's completely changed.

 

Just don't settle.

[limichelle]

Hi,

 

You are still very young! Someone will come along. In the meantime have fun and enjoy your twenties!

 

Lisa

[kurtosisapp]

I thought this guy was somewhat interested in me. We'd never really talked but he turned all the way aroundaround in a crowded room (people faced front to watch a performance) to smile and wave at me. And then throughout the night I caught him turning his head in my direction. The one time I got closer to him and made eye contact, he raised his eyebrows quickly.

 

But in the end, it turned out he wasn't interested. The interaction with him at the party left an indelible mark on me; I'd never had a guy pay attention to me like that (and never end up speaking to me). I'm worried I'll never find someone I like

[Wiseman2]

Unfortunately you sound painfully shy and even if a guy is friendly you are reading the tea leaves instead of returning the friendliness. Wondering chronically "are they into me" and being so self-conscious that you appear unapproachable...is something to work on first.

 

I doubt it's about looks but rather that you're not getting attention from guys and maybe work on being open, smiling, being friendly, approachable. Guys walk up to girls like that and ask them out. Why? Because they seem nice and easy to get to know not because they are supermodels.

[ABCABC123ABC]

Just because this guy sort of rejected you, doesn't mean you're unattractive. He may have not been attracted to you (if this is what deterred him), but that doesn't mean your ugly. That is why attraction is completely subjective.

 

For example, I consider myself to be attractive and so does my gf. If I were to ask 100 girls if they found me attractive, I'm sure a fair amount would say no. Does this mean I'm ugly? Not at all. It just so happens that I didn't meet their requirements for what their attracted to.

 

Just because you're 21 and not in a relationship doesn't mean you're doomed to be single forever. Use this time to discover who you are and don't let a relationship/guy hold you back.

[kurtosisapp]

He showed more interest than guys who have asked me out. Could I have just been imagining the signs? I'm only shy around certain guys. How do I gain confidence though? I'm already pretty accomplished.

[Zaphod]

You think 21's your prime.

 

Is your first mistake.

[JTP1994]

Rejection means very little. Theres more chance you'll be rejected than the opposite obviously.

 

I feel similar to you, but 21 is so young, so is 22... I just don't care that much right now. Sometimes I get scared I wont find anyone that I actually like but it will surely come my way one day, as it will for you.

 

Stop panicking. Go have fun.

xo

[Matti Jr]

How do you gain confidence? Seriously, just be yourself and don't worry. Hell, you should enjoy the free time you have while you're single.

[superfan]

21 is SO SO young. You have TONS of time.

[Sportster2005]

I'm in my prime and I can't get guys i like to become interested in me. My standards are not high! I guess I'm just unattractive?

 

Prime is 19 to 90. You're creating a false crisis.

[Almira23]

I think too much pressure is put on adults of our age to get married and have kids, but more often than not, we put this pressure upon ourselves. I have met many people who are much older than me who wish to have the same freedom that I have right now. I have met a lot of people, who have told me about their regrets when they were younger like getting married too soon, not enjoying their early 20's, not being to explore their life and figure out what they love because they were always attached to someone. I would take this opportunity and have as much fun as I possibly can and someone will eventually come along. There's really nothing wrong with getting married and having children lets say 10 years from now when you're 31. It's all about the right time for everything.