David9834 Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 IT hurts so much to love her, and shes just dating away, all 3 of these people are were her friends!!! its been 11 months, i mean i cant even tink of being with someone and shes now with her 3rd, this time it seems serious and im just so heart broken and angry, how could she!! how could anyone just move so quicky, so many times... im just down in the dumps guys, all 3 times hurt just as much and i just want to forget her stupid ass, but my stupid heart wont let me, she just started dating this new guy on valentines day, here i was missing her, and shes now dating again. love is ed up, ive been in limbo for 11 months and im just tired and dont know if i can keep going Link to comment
abitbroken Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 Who cares what she does. She is your ex. Stop looking at Facebook or any other thing you are using to find out this info. You need to move on and heal, Link to comment
Pixels Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 Probably sucks more for her... To be that uncertain and unhappy in three relationships? I dunno, maybe she's just poly and has no idea it's an actual thing... Either way I'd rather be in your shoes. Link to comment
1baddc5 Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 Cut all contact. Block her on all social media. You both clearly have different ways to dealing with things. She's probably trying to fill a void by dating people. I am like you where I need time to process and get over things before I can commit to another relationship. At the end of the day you just handle things differently. There is light at the end of the tunnel. You will be fine. I've been in breakups with 2+ yr relationships a few times, and it always gets better with time. Link to comment
kennababy63 Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 I know a breakup is painful, especially when you don't want to move on. You have to think what is better for you in the long run, and she obviously isn't meant for you. I know it's hard to put your feelings aside, but you need to. Focus on yourself and what's best for you. If someone can move on that quickly, than she never cared about you very much in the first place. Take time to heal and better yourself. When you're ready for another relationship, the right girl will come along. Keep your head up Link to comment
Cynder Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 I know a woman like this. She is my boyfriend's good friend, as well as his ex. She has dated all of her male friends, some multiple times now. She has been in about 8 "serious relationships" just in the 4 years my boyfriend and I have been together. She will end it with one and then a week later be with someone new. Most of her exes practically warship her on facebook and will drive over an hour to hang out with her. I'm not saying this lifestyle is bad for those who can handle it. I don't even think anything bad of her as a person. But most of us don't have the emotional resilience to break up with someone every few months. Your ex most likely bounces from man to man because she doesn't want to be alone. Just cut all contact with her. Staying in contact with her is not helping you move on. Link to comment
Dashottcalla Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 For it to be 11 months later and you're still cyber stalking her is not a good sign on your part, and that's a huge understatement. You're hurting so bad because you never allowed yourself to let go of somebody who doesn't care or even think about you. I read your post on the 10th of this month where you said you would stop checking her facebook, 6 days later you're still checking her facebook. You'll never heal as long as you check up on her, you know that. You won't get better as long as you still want her back, you will start to get better when you only focus on YOURSELF and yourself only. Make yourself a better man in all aspects of manhood. Force yourself to stop thinking about her, exercise, read, study, listen to music, go out to a bar/club, anything besides spending your every waking moments thinking about your ex and who she's with and how long it will last and if she'll ever come back. It's been a year now, you need to accept that she isn't coming back and even in the unlikely scenario that she does come back, you are not in the proper mental place to sustain that relationship. You've built her up in your mind to be a goddess of some sort and you're still holding her on that pedestal. Those types of relationships never work out. Get back to yourself David, your time is too valuable don't waste anymore of it endlessly checking on her social network activity and hoping that she'll come back to you. Link to comment
Hazyillusions Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 I don't think it's healthy that someone has three relationships in less than a year. Shows a lot about her sense of self. You dodged a bullet, I know it hurts now but in a year or two you'll realise this eventually. Link to comment
David9834 Posted February 17, 2016 Author Share Posted February 17, 2016 Thank you abitbroken, I know your right, its just hard.... I blocker her on FB.. Ur right I shouldnt waste another second of my time being hurt over someone who can so easily move one, what we had obviously wasnt that special Link to comment
David9834 Posted February 17, 2016 Author Share Posted February 17, 2016 Thank you Hazyillusions... Thats what i was thinking its unhealthy... basically From valentines day 2015(We spent it together) to valentines day 2016, she had been in four different relationships..... me then C then N and now D, four different people that cant be healthy, whatever imma do it the right way.. take me time, grow and find somebody one day Link to comment
David9834 Posted February 17, 2016 Author Share Posted February 17, 2016 THANK YOU SO MUCH Dashottcalla.... Your being really honest and your so right... I blocker her on FB and I WONT LOOK anymore i swear... Its sad that i let her life hurt me so much, i should just find happiness with myself.. its just hard when you love someone so much and they just ing give up on you, i was suppose to marry her and now shes already in her third relationship and it hasnt even been a year... I know she isnt coming back and even if she did I would say NOOO!! but I dont nned to think about her anymore... The only problem is Im going back to my University in 6 months, shes there... Im not goona go to a different university just cause shes there, I love that place, LOVE IT! anyways ive seen her twice in these 11 months, 6 more months from now were gonna be at the same school, right now we are in diff. states, anyways im afraid to heal and then see her again and fall apart, but ill worry about it later, whatever... I wont let it get to me.... I want to be happy, and I cant wait to find someone who will actually stand by me and not give up and ing date half her facebook friends list Link to comment
Dashottcalla Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 We've all been there David, believe me. I've been there quite a few times. You feel like your life has been turned upside down, you keep thinking of how the future was "supposed" to be with her and that brings the most sadness, that and finding out what she's doing and who she's doing it with. You need to leave all those thoughts, hopes, dreams in the past. Now you have 6 months to heal. That is a very good amount of time. Seeing her at the University will only make you fall apart if you're not truly over her and over the idea that she'll be yours again one day. So in this time truly focus on yourself for yourself. Do not allow the thought of her to influence what you do. She will undoubtedly cross your mind, but don't let those thoughts linger, focus your thoughts on anything that makes you happy and a better person. Link to comment
Ms Darcy Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 Thank you Hazyillusions... Thats what i was thinking its unhealthy... basically From valentines day 2015(We spent it together) to valentines day 2016, she had been in four different relationships..... me then C then N and now D, four different people that cant be healthy, whatever imma do it the right way.. take me time, grow and find somebody one day I know this is the answer that you are looking for but not the one you need. Honestly, whether it's healthy or unhealthy we won't know because we don't know the details of each situation. What we DO know is that you are not helping yourself heal by continuing to track her on facebook. You are stuck and you are upset that she is at least trying to move forward. Link to comment
David9834 Posted February 17, 2016 Author Share Posted February 17, 2016 Thanks again Dashottcalla, your right 6 months is a great amount of time... plus the campus is rather big, which means it would be 6 months if i ran into her the very first day back which is unlikely, the good thing is i have friends over there so when i get back ill be around them not worrying about her... Last night i didnt really think of my ex like i used to. but thought of how one day i will have someone again, it may be a long while from now but i know its coming, anyways its so dumb to let her life ruin mine, and Ill do what i should have done long ago, and just let go, we dont have a future, and i deserve better.. anyways, Im hopeful, thank you because it really is hard to find people who understand my situation, you and everyone else really gave great advice!! Im also going to log out of this website, as it only reminds me im here cause of the pain and i dont need to be thinking of that, so I will be gone now... maybe return one day, months from now,when i feel better, so i can help people the way you helped me my friend, thank you again and have a great day my friend Link to comment
PH Suite Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 Some people's lives, and soul, are empty. They try to fill that void with various things from drugs to eating. Relationships is a very common filler. They never last, because that person is never truly present and willing to put the work required in. Once she burns yet another bridge, she moves on to the next and usually starts another "relationship" within days maybe weeks. Typically it's women who do this, usually attractive, because men are major sucker/enablers for a pretty girl. Be glad to be rid of her and move on. Grow. Link to comment
David9834 Posted February 18, 2016 Author Share Posted February 18, 2016 I know your right PH Suite I Filled the void with food and video games haha, but I really need to grow and leave her behind in the past, moving forward I'm excited to find love again one day, but before I get there, I need to be in a better place, I cant date someone If im still looking up my ex(Well not anymore but I did on valentines day) Anyways thank you for your kind words my friend Link to comment
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.