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I want to take a break from dating


Darksoul26

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Posted

Dating makes me miserable, depressed and anxious. I am so much Happier being alone. However I am always fed these ideas about how I have to be in a relationship to be happy etc. I'm 25 and everyone else is getting married so I feel pressure to be going down that route as well. Is it really the end of the world and hope to find a relationship if I take a break and work on myself?

Posted

Nope. Not the and of the world at all. I have never been married. My brother married for the first time at age 55 and he's happy as a clam.

Posted
Dating makes me miserable, depressed and anxious. I am so much Happier being alone. However I am always fed these ideas about how I have to be in a relationship to be happy etc. I'm 25 and everyone else is getting married so I feel pressure to be going down that route as well. Is it really the end of the world and hope to find a relationship if I take a break and work on myself?

 

You're going about dating all wrong then. If you find the right person, then dating shouldn't make your miserable, depressed, and anxious. You should actually want to see them and be happy to do so. If you are just going on frequent dates one after the next with random strangers and they aren't working out then stop doing that. If you are happy being alone (although I think most people aren't fully satisfied with life being alone forever), then by all means you don't have to date ever again. But you can still find the right person and not worry about dating one person after the next if that isn't working out.

 

Number two - so what, everyone else around you is in a relationship/getting married? Good for them, that has nothing to do with you. In my opinion too many people are too afraid to be alone and get in a rush and marry the wrong person when they are 25. Take a look at some divorce statistics out there, it's pretty shocking. I'm 25 as well and I thought I had my life all figured out, but I really don't. I'm just starting to now realize and think about what I want to do with my life. I mean, I have my career figured out, but there are SO many other variables I haven't figured out.

 

What kind of person do I want to be, what do I like to do for fun, do I want to move from my hometown, do I want to travel more? I'm trying a lot of new things as I get older, learning more about myself and what I like. I don't see how people can accomplish that when they are tied down at 25 years old married and possibly raising a child already. I think people getting married at 25 is blind and stupid.

Posted

I actually feel similarly. I'm pretty happy going solo & doing my own thing. Then I meet someone, date for a bit, it ends, it sucks. I was doing just fine being single so maybe it's best to stay that way for a while! Especially if you are still considering making big changes in your life such as a new career or relocating. It's easier to make it work with someone after you've already set yourself up for what you want out of life.

Posted

You're right I continue to go on dates with the wrong people and I think it's because they are all from online. Mostly I want to take a break from dating online and do my own thing. I would still be open to a date with someone if I met them IRL.

Posted
I actually feel similarly. I'm pretty happy going solo & doing my own thing. Then I meet someone, date for a bit, it ends, it sucks. I was doing just fine being single so maybe it's best to stay that way for a while! Especially if you are still considering making big changes in your life such as a new career or relocating. It's easier to make it work with someone after you've already set yourself up for what you want out of life.

 

When I began online dating I was meeting up to 3 girls a week - it was WAY too much. Now I am far more picky about who I meet, a good thing I learned was to write on a sheet of paper, one side what you want and on the other side, what you absolutely do not want. Putting what you are after onto paper makes the selection process much easier, and if you see them in public you can chat them up.

 

Now I only go on a couple of dates every month and they go well, its not the old endless "having a drink with random strangers" how it felt before.

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