Why the sudden turnaround?

[kaizor]

So i have been texting and flirting with this friend of mine for a while but it was nothing serious and i never thought of dating her until few weeks back, she suddenly told me that instead of testing each other and wasting time, we should really get to know each other better and see if we are suitable.

 

Some background information on her, has been single so far in her life, she's 27 this year. Very introverted, conservative and quiet girl, who prefers to keep a low profile. From what i know, probably has had zero or few suitors. And because she is conservative, it was really surprising to me when she took the initiative to tell me that we should get to know each other better. I took it as a very good sign.

 

After what she told me, i asked her out and the first date went quite well. I ordered some flowers to be delivered to her workplace a few days after that but that backfired a bit, as she told me she wasn't quite ready to handle all the questioning from her colleagues. She wasn't angry but felt a bit rushed.

 

We went on a second date, which was still quite ok, at least i didn't find her feeling uncomfortable or awkward and we were chatting quite well.

 

But the next few days, she started to respond lesser and lesser to my text and when i ask her what was going on, she told me she needed more time, don't want to rush into anything and wanted to understand each other before making any decisions and it might be better to just text and not go out?

 

I asked her whether it was because she felt like i was rushing things and she felt pressurized? But she denied it and told me not to think too much. I asked her whether was there still any mutual interest but she did not reply to that.

 

So what do you guys think? Is it a classic "Not-interested-and-wanna-let-the-guy-down-gently" case or She just isn't used to a guy suddenly getting into her life

[DoF]

Listen to her and give her what she wants, space.

 

Meanwhile, that shouldn't stop you from dating other women....and you should! There is no commitment or relationship with this one and she sounds kind of sketchy to be honest.

 

History is THE BEST indicator of the future. Her history has 0 relationship experience.....

 

I would not communicate with her. But if you want to ONLY DO IT 1 MORE TIME and let her take steps to rekindle.

 

Remember, keep communication AND initiative to meet at 50/50 balance.

 

Flowers to work was a HUGE mistake, you should've brought them to 2nd date or have them sent to her house or something......

[missmarple]

I agree that flowers sent to work was a mistake but, in any case, if someone told me it might be better to just text and not go out, I'd consider them a lost case and move on. It doesn't matter why she lost interest but she did.

[mhowe]

She has no idea on how to date. I would write this off as a lost cause.

 

For future ref: no flowers to work unless in a committed relationship. Florists deliver to homes on Sat. if you feel the need.

[BigKK]

You have some learning to do...I agree with everyone on the flowers. You came on very very strong with a move like that. Next time if you want to be romantic bring one rose or something, but still...hold off until there is some more investment by both parties.

 

As for her...she's giving you the slow fade...take it as a sign that she's not interested. Just stop texting.

[Sportster2005]

So what do you guys think? Is it a classic "Not-interested-and-wanna-let-the-guy-down-gently" case

 

That's exactly what it is.

[kaizor]

She has no idea on how to date. I would write this off as a lost cause.

 

For future ref: no flowers to work unless in a committed relationship. Florists deliver to homes on Sat. if you feel the need.

 

Just curious, what would u consider before defining somebody as knowing how to date?

[kaizor]

History is THE BEST indicator of the future. Her history has 0 relationship experience.....

 

so in your opinion, having no previous experience in relationships is a strong indicator that she would not have any relationships in the future?

 

Why is that so? Aren't there people who get into relationships at a much older age?