I don't know what's wrong with me?!

[kiacher]

I really don't know what's wrong with me for the last few years but I went from being an optimistic, motivated and happy kind of person to being completely mopey, unsatisfied with my life and I can't seem to get even a little bit motivated about things anymore.

 

I've done the whole counselling thing and got answers like "eat properly and get plenty of sleep", which obviously worked wonders - NOT, but aside from that it's something I haven't been able to sort out since I was 16 - and I'm 23 now.

 

I'm sick of waiting for my mood to go all over the place with no reason and I'm tired of feeling anxious and stressed all the time. I definitely had loads of hard times in my life when I had to deal with more than I probably should have for my but I did pull through it AT THE TIME, it just seems like these events had more of a lasting affect on me than I realised because after years of people relying on me I find myself feeling overwhelmed and with too much on my plate. The annoying thing is that now everyone thinks of me as someone who can pull through and who can handle everything - including their problems as well as my own. No one really knows how bad I feel inside and even though I've tried to communicate lately that I have too much on my plate, which I would usually never talk about, people seem to just keep asking from me and pulling out of me.

 

It's starting to affect me in terms of my career in that I just can't pull through the final exams that I will ever have to do in my life. They're hugely important to my career and I keep procrastinating and almost daydreaming that I could run away from it all. I've started to wonder if I even chose this career path for me or if I chose it to do the right thing and get my parents' idea of a "steady job".

 

I'm married and I love my husband to pieces, he's a really good guy but at the same time I feel like it's another person who is relying on me to be the strong and capable one when really all I want to do is go to an island and live like a hermit.

 

I can't even explain fully what's wrong with me or what I'm feeling but I just know I feel pulled in too many directions and conflicted about whether my lifestyle is the lifestyle I should be leading... anyway it's always good to vent! Thanks

[ChiBrunette]

Youre young. Finals - dont determine your life.

I promise you. I studied pharmacology and when it came time to take the pCats (national test for licensing) .... I thought I was going to die. I actually left mid test to throw up.

 

Eating healthy is great. Sleep? Yeah thats cool...but who sleeps when they're stressed? Your mind isnt shutting down, so sleep and you arent going to become good friends any time soon.

 

I cant and wont diagnose over the internet... but I would suggest looking into anti depressants. Not a heavy dose where your sedated and vegetated but just a small 25-35mg dose. The dr can figure that out and maybe you just need that light pick me up.

 

Second suggestion- learning how to say no and not worrying so much about others. Its hard to do, but when you take on the weight of the world for others - youre not leaving any room for you.

 

Its okay to be selfish and worry about you. In fact, its necessary. Your happiness, Your fulfillment - must come first. This is your life, its your story to write, so make it a good one that YOU will enjoy. Dont worry about anyone elses opinion.

 

Good Luck!

[SooSad33]

You sounds confused...

Maybe look into some therapy.. or talk to your dr to see if you may have some depression?

 

Therapy can always help. Life can get the better part of us sometimes.