How long for things to return to normal after a fight?

[Misaki27]

My boyfriend of almost 6 months and I had a fight about 2 days ago. I was hurt because of some old pictures of his on Facebook and when he went out with his friends for a "guys' night out", I panicked. Before he met me, he was quite the partying type, which I'm not a fan of.

 

So, instead of waiting for him to get back from the outing and talk to him on Skype, I went to bed. He called me at about 10 pm, saying he had gotten home an hour before and he hadn't had anything to drink. Still, I said some harsh things that I apologized for afterwards. Apparently, all has been forgotten: he deleted the aforementioned photos, I apologized and he said he isn't angry anymore and he loves me a lot.

 

Still, I feel like he's upset and I don't know why. He said I worry too much about stupid things, that he wants to be with me forever and we should drop the subject of the fight that night. Also, he says that if I keep asking him if he's upset, it reminds him of that moment and it makes it hard for him to get over it. I understand that, but I'm scared and I want things to get back to normal.

 

Is there anything I can do?

[mhowe]

Couple of things ---- stop worrying about pictures or issues from the past that have nothing to do with you.

Stop trying to change him --- he likes to be social, you don't.

Bite your tongue before giving him a tongue lashing for no reason.

And finally, stop asking if he is upset. He has given you the reason.

[sara-pezzini]

agree 100% with mhowe, and it takes time, it will fade but stop asking him and reminding him of it!!

[IAmFCA]

Asking how is he feeling etc may be a way of getting affirmation.

 

Its important that there always are consequences for our behavior, good and bad. It isn't fair to expect it to be as if the fight never happened. Your behavior is information he has, just as his behavior is information you have, with which to better understand you. Remember to be kind, always, even when resolving differences. You are not his keeper or his parent or his parole officer. Your explosion was really about your own insecurity, which you hid behind anger. Take responsibility for your emotions next time, instead of putting this on him, and do it kindly. "I know it's silly, I get insecure because I know when I used to go out, this is how my friends behaved. I need to stop projecting their behavior onto you. Just give me a minute..."

[Edmund Exley]

I always shudder when I read "I was hurt when I saw the past"

 

What right do you have to be hurt over something that happened before you even knew a person existed? Its immature, self-centric, and ridiculous behavior.

[Doc Blaze]

I looked over your past threads and this isnt just a normal fight..you have been on his case since day 1 since you have dating..everytime he goes out you question if he will cheat but according to what you write he hasnt or even hinted at it..i might be wrong though...I think you are starting to push him away and thats why he doesnt want to talk about it.. If you dont figure out how to get over this idk how much longer he will be able to last. Its only been 6 months too..Thats not a good sign.