My boyfriend entered me into a blow job contest with his friends

[Moon13]

So my boyfriend calls me up while he was at work and says that his friends, who are also co-workers, watched this video about giving a blow job with a grapefruit on Youtube.I went ahead and watched it and I'm not doing that.. I don't even like grapefruit. Basically they made up a contest that whoever can get their girlfriend to give them a grapefruit blow job first wins a 6 pack of beer. I know it's only a joke, and I could hear his friend in the background yelling and saying he's going to win and they're laughing.. but I'm actually kind of pissed off. I'm not a sexual prude or anything, I just don't like my boyfriends friends knowing what I do in bed, it's weird and awkward, and my boyfriend knows that because I've told him a hundred times. I actually feel kind of degraded. Like I'm doing the blow job.. but my boyfriend gets the beer? Ya right.. he deserves to lose. He definitely knew I was irritated on the phone and I told him I'm not doing that. He didn't even say sorry, just said "it's only a joke". I'm so bitter about this, am I being reasonable or too sensitive?

[mhowe]

Way too sensitive.

[Edmund Exley]

You expressed your displeasure about it. Time to let it go.

[poetryandlyrics]

I don't think you're being "too sensitive." I'd feel like a sex toy. If it was just talked about between your boyfriend and you, then okay, but him and his friends... ? Taking a step too far. But just let it go, he apologized. What else can you do? If it's a common occurrence and you feel repeatedly uncomfortable, then let him go.

[DancingFool]

I'd be pretty unhappy with that as well. Your bf sounds like an immature twit.

Ultimately, it's not really what others think, it's what you think and feel about things like that and if that's not your cup of tea, that's fine. There is no right or wrong here.

[missmarple]

How old is this clown? 17?

[Edmund Exley]

How old is this clown? 17?

 

Guys a lot older than that behave this way.

[valerie25]

If you feel uncomfortable, he should respect your feelings.

[Edmund Exley]

If you feel uncomfortable, he should respect your feelings.

 

He didn't make her go through with it

[Fudgie]

Guys a lot older than that behave this way.

 

(Sadly) true, but any halfway decent guy is going to know that it's pretty immature at its base so he's going to have the sense to not involve his girlfriend.

 

I mean really, how did he expect her to react? Unless she's rather raunchy herself, I don't know why he thought this was a good idea to bring it up to her.

 

He should have just kept it as a joke among his friends.

[mhowe]

He called and told her about the joke....which wasn't necessary at all. It is a YouTube video....

 

And if he entered her in a real contest and she doesn't want to do it, she doesn't have to....it was a stupid joke.

[valerie25]

He didn't make her go through with it

 

True. But he knows that EVEN THE POSSIBILITY of him discussing their sex life with his friends makes her uncomfortable. She clearly doesn't like this kind of jokes.

[mhowe]

Then she should drop the boy and find a man.

[Edmund Exley]

True. But he knows that EVEN THE POSSIBILITY of him discussing their sex life with his friends makes her uncomfortable. She clearly doesn't like this kind of jokes.

 

Perhaps he didn't know before because he hadn't before. Now he knows. He owned it, said it was a joke. How long should she drag this out?

[Doc Blaze]

let it go...it was a joke...immature joke ..things happen..ive dont stupid things to piss off my gf also....

[panther]

Although I think this may be immature and I don't believe my boyfriend would do something like this to me, even if he would, I would never feel like a sexual object due to this. But that is because I know I am not a sexual toy to him. I would try to take it with humour. I guess it depends on how the people are and how this came up. It's not really such a big deal. Just say you think it's immature and forget it.

[notevensure]

I think this is totally disrespectful. Yes it's a joke, but it is a joke at your expense.

 

I would freeze him out a bit until he apologizes. Don't nag him. Just pull back a little bit. He needs to learn that if he hopes to ever have sex again, he needs to make you feel respected and adored, not like a he can make a bet with his friends on. That is really rude.

[Firiel]

I would be pissed too, specifically because he didn't apologize and tried to shrug it off as a joke. Plus, you say this has been an issue before. If he knows this kind of thing bothers you, he should respect that, full stop. My boyfriend made a sexual joke about me in front of his friends once. I told him it bothered me, and he apologized and hasn't done it since.

 

Unfortunately, since the guy has shown he has no intention of changing based on your comfort-level or embarrassment, you really only have two choices: break up with him or stay with him.

[Fudgie]

I think overall, if your relationship is good and he treats you respectfully, I would forgive him and stay with him. But be sure to talk to him and have him understand, you didn't like it, you didn't care if it was a joke, and you'd prefer to be left out of his immature games/bets with his friends. Tell him you don't want to hear about them in the future.

[ParisPaulette]

I would be like, "Excuse me hon, first you have to watch the youtube video about giving me pleasure using strawberries. Then we'll talk. And what you're asking is worth so much more than just a six pack, I want dinner and a movie out of the deal if I help you win." And you say it loudly, laughing where he and his friends can hear you loud and clear if this ever happens again.

 

Treat this whole thing and this group of baby frat boys like what they are, the biggest joke on the planet. No real man is going to call his girlfriend up and say something like that. What are these guys all 12? (No offense to mature 12-year-olds)

[Mermer]

I think it is really hurtful what happened but u should be smart and let the guys die from the inside and say "of course honey!" And laugh about it later with your bf/hubby that way u win in every way.

[Moon13]

He didn't apologize. I'm gonna let it go because he would never disrespect me on purpose. But still bothered me, especially since he knows I'm private with that stuff.

[Moon13]

I expressed online.. not to him, other than the tone of my voice. I'm going to let it go, because I know he didn't intend to hurt me, but if I feel hurt by it, that's not something I can help. People are all different.

[Fudgie]

I'm in agreement that you should let it go if he treats you well otherwise, but I think you should talk to him face-to-face and tell him that you don't appreciate this kind of humour and you'd rather not hear at all about his "good old boys" time.

[Moon13]

Honestly if he really wanted it.. I would have done it for him. But not when it's through a contest with his friends to get him free beer. And yeah he should have kept it as a joke without actually going through it.