What do i do now?

[deadmareish]

You can probably see I post a lot. Just getting outside perspectives really help you see things more clearly.

As you can see from my previous threads I've been having trouble excepting my break up. I did really well at first, I did NC for 3 weeks and then he broke it. Then I had to give his stuff back and it's been going downhill ever since.

 

Ok so, me and my ex ended up having it out today. Something just got mentioned and I ended up telling him I'm fed up of his hot / cold behaviour and yo-yoing me around. I think I'll finally except it's over now, even though it's the hardest thing.

 

Where do I go from here? 6 years of friendship and 2 years of relationship is a long time. I feel so lost now

[butterflyburn]

You don't really have a choice except moving on. Come up with an action plan and solidly set your sight on healing. There is nothing else to be done but that. No amount of postings, opinions etc will change that ultimately it all comes from within you

[Capttrae]

I'm in the same boat as you, wish I could help you some

[panther]

Here is one of my favourite quotes: If you are going through hell, keep going. By Winston Churchill

That is what you do, you keep going until one day you realise you don't care anymore.

Keep busy, go out with friends.

[deadmareish]

Here is one of my favourite quotes: If you are going through hell, keep going. By Winston Churchill.

 

I love that! I will always keep that in mind. I think it will be my new life motto!

[spazmy]

keep going. It may take a while. But you will be over it. The thing about hot and cold people is that you are, at some level, already prepared from deep within for a breakup. You know there is something fundamentally incompatible between the two of you -- which leads to the hot and cold situations. NC, in that sense, is the cure. If there are any feelings in the other which go beyond mere flakiness, those feelings will surface through nc. If not, it is even better. Time to move on and find somebody who is rock solid and will stand by you. Carry on and cheerio. Hugs.

[deadmareish]

keep going. It may take a while. But you will be over it. The thing about hot and cold people is that you are, at some level, already prepared from deep within for a breakup. You know there is something fundamentally incompatible between the two of you -- which leads to the hot and cold situations. NC, in that sense, is the cure. If there are any feelings in the other which go beyond mere flakiness, those feelings will surface through nc. If not, it is even better. Time to move on and find somebody who is rock solid and will stand by you. Carry on and cheerio. Hugs.

 

Thank you so much for your advice. I think it's the most sense I've had since this whole thing started.

Really going to try and stick at the NC thing! Wish me luck!

Thanks for your support!