SaRaHmArIe8588 Posted December 22, 2004 Share Posted December 22, 2004 Just yesterday i found out i was pregnant...i dont know what im going to do. i dont know how to tell my parents or my boyfriend...but the hardest thing isnt going to be telling my parents...its going to be telling my boyfriend. We havent even had sex...this guy that i talked about in other posts that i messed around with a few months back, before i was with my boyfriend...well we were hangin out..and it just happened. Does any one have any ideas what to tell my boyfriend? I know this is gonna end the relationship, but it was a drunken mistake..and i dont think that will make him understand. I told the guy and he was very cool about it, but i dont know what to do about my boyfriend. Please help. Sarah Link to comment
lostlove Posted December 22, 2004 Share Posted December 22, 2004 perhaps you should talk to your parents about it, and once they cool down, ask them for advice on how to talk to your boyfriend. they've probably been through more and seen more than you have, and so they might have some ideas that you hadn't thought of. good luck! Link to comment
RayKay Posted December 22, 2004 Share Posted December 22, 2004 Well, there is not much you can say that will lessen the shock or pain of it, and don't expect him to be understanding or even want to talk about it right away...but you do have to tell him. You might not be able to make him "understand" but you owe it to him to be honest about it and be patient if he wants answers or wants to leave....your broke his trust and your consequences might be more than a pregnancy..but at least you know you might lose him. And probably the sooner the better. Same with your parents. And I am sorry you are going through this, be strong and I hope you have a great family and friends..and don't forget about us here on enotalone! Peace & Love Link to comment
melrich Posted December 22, 2004 Share Posted December 22, 2004 Sorry to hear you are in this situation. I think this issue is probably more complex than can be dealt with this on this board. If you feel this is too difficult to discuss with your parents then perhaps you should seek out the family planning counsellors in your area. Have you thought about whether you are going to terminate the pregnancy? If that is an option you should definitely seek some counselling. There are professionals out there that can help you deal with this and advise you of all your options. Link to comment
Josh G. Posted December 22, 2004 Share Posted December 22, 2004 OK, Im going to tell you something you dont want to hear, but it is what I would do if this happened to my gf. I would break up with her, IF i got her pregnant, I wouldnt, I would stick it out, and be a father to the kid, but... if she cheated on me, and got pregnant, I wouldnt support her at all, (why pay the consequenses of something I didnt do?) and I would be heartbroken about the whole thing, and probally not talk to you anymore. Im sorry, I hope your bf is more understanding then me, But im trying to tell you, Dont be suprized if he isnt. Sorry to hear about all this, and best of luck. Link to comment
lilsht05 Posted December 22, 2004 Share Posted December 22, 2004 Ok... so let me understand a little bit better, you got pregnant BEFORE you were with your boyfriend... correct?? If so and if he actually likes you and cares for you then I think he should understand. If you doesn't care for you or any of that shibby then I think he is going to get a little P.O.ed. I you did actually cheat on him then I wouldn't expect much out of him. I hope all works out ok for you!!!!! Good Luck with everything and let us all know what happens!!!!! Link to comment
maasikus Posted December 22, 2004 Share Posted December 22, 2004 ok..let me get it straight...at 16 u got drunk....AND cheated on ur b/f AND got pregnant I think u shud not waste time in talkin to ur folks...one step at a time...then talk to ur b/f about it...no amount of apologies is gonna make him feel good about it...he wud ask u y he wasnt told about ur drunken mistake before... anyway...good luck with everything....hope u make the right choices...at 16 if u choose to have the baby...life is not gonna be a bed of roses anymore...but thats just my opinion... hope u have all the strength and courage..u will need it maasikus Link to comment
behind_these_eyes Posted December 22, 2004 Share Posted December 22, 2004 wow maasikus, that's really not encouraging when you're in that situation. everyone makes mistakes, no matter how big or little they are. it's true that life won't be easy with a baby, but who says it would be easy without a baby? instead of automatically thinking of this as a bad thing, look at what she has a chance to have here - a son or a daughter. that is amazing, in my opinion. SaRaHmArIe8588- as for your boyfriend, if he would leave you when you need him most, he's either confused or he's not worth holding onto. priorities change. that's great that the father is supportive, and that you arent that scared about telling your parents. I wish you the best of luck. sometimes the hardest things you have to do are the most rewarding. Link to comment
maasikus Posted December 22, 2004 Share Posted December 22, 2004 behind_these_eyes : at 17...u hardly know how the real world is...to survive in this world..u need a decent job...and for that u need to either devot lots of time or shud have the right qualifications... begetting children comes after that...when some1 depends on their parents for stuff...its unfair to the parents....thats what i meant... anyway thats not our concern here...the main thing here is to let concerned people know and proceed... i hope kids are a bit more careful in future...wonder when they will learn Link to comment
Ron Posted December 22, 2004 Share Posted December 22, 2004 Hi.. how's the situation going? Must not be the best of fits to be in at this moment.. but we just have to take hold of life and continue to soldier on. I'm not a big fan of teenage pregnancy but that's secondary. Everyone makes (and lives) their choices. Only way is to look ahead and make the best of the situation. What's more important is perhaps getting you the emotional support to help you plan through this important time. Have you decided on telling yr parents? i guess during pregnancy, at any age, having family supporting you (financially, emotionally, spiritually) is always good... needless to say, at 16, it's probably totally necessary. If the family ties are strong, perhaps they are the first persons you may want to share the situation and decision with. Perhaps yr parents can clear some of the many many thoughts which may be running through your head. are you planning to keep the baby? are you still staying in school? how are you going to support the baby if you plan to keep it? even if the parents are helpful, they too may not be certain on how to approach this matter.. as someone has posted earlier , there are professional help out there who can help guide you through this... you're not alone... The current bf - whether he will stay or not.. there's nothing you can do there anyway.. how and what you plan to tell him, you prob know that in yr heart.. just a matter of deciding and holding yrself to the task of telling him. good luck, my friend.. and hope things go well for you.. Link to comment
XxxMUAHxxX Posted December 22, 2004 Share Posted December 22, 2004 Ok..Umm..just a thing to say, it wasn't a drunken mistake. At 16, you should know well enough how sex works, and how you react to drinking alcohol. I admit, I've done stupid things whilest drunk, but I have never blammed it on alcohol. And if you include that with the talk with your parents- it will make it worse!! Link to comment
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