cadmiumblue Posted October 4, 2012 Share Posted October 4, 2012 What can you do? Do you just feel sad and depressed? Is it hard to see couples kissing, knowing you can't kiss? It is depressing. How do you cope? Link to comment
pl3asehelp Posted October 4, 2012 Share Posted October 4, 2012 I don't feel sad or depressed, but it is hard. I just remind myself that having young kids means a lot of work and sacrifice and that their needs are more important than my desires right now. Link to comment
Jetta Posted October 4, 2012 Share Posted October 4, 2012 Well I don't get depressed but I get down about being single sometimes. I really miss the affection of another person. I don't know how to replace that fully, but I do try in other ways. Link to comment
cadmiumblue Posted October 4, 2012 Author Share Posted October 4, 2012 I don't feel sad or depressed, but it is hard. I just remind myself that having young kids means a lot of work and sacrifice and that their needs are more important than my desires right now. I thought you were married. Link to comment
cadmiumblue Posted October 4, 2012 Author Share Posted October 4, 2012 My life has no sex and no romance btw, and I am depressed. Link to comment
pl3asehelp Posted October 4, 2012 Share Posted October 4, 2012 I thought you were married. I am - but that doesn't always mean you have any more sex or romance than single people at any given time. Link to comment
robot20 Posted October 4, 2012 Share Posted October 4, 2012 Being single isnt all bad. You dont have to worry about being hurt by someone you trusted, having someone make their problems your problems, thats to name a few. Sure, it sucks sometimes seeing "happy" couples: holding hands and being affectionate, makes me feel like I'm missing out. Theres several reasons I cope with it, people have made me feel that the only person I can fully trust is myself, I dont have to worry about what someone else is doing behind my back, Maybe all my bad relationships and being cheated on has made me cynical Link to comment
cadmiumblue Posted October 4, 2012 Author Share Posted October 4, 2012 Being single is fun when you're not involuntarily celibate. Single people who "date" and do things are happy, that's what people mean when they say it's fun to be single. It's not fun being single this way. Link to comment
cocoon2012 Posted October 4, 2012 Share Posted October 4, 2012 Our passion is the source of our CREATIVE POWER,..so the formula is putting our passion into creation...getting connected to our creative art and self interests....relations are not our destiny but they are tools and means to reach our highr being...so if a helpful relation is not available we may decide to keep on going by ourselves till we meet one.... Link to comment
stardom Posted October 4, 2012 Share Posted October 4, 2012 I deal with being a 28-year old romance-virgin by pursuing adventures which make me temporarily feel happily unfettered (though such positive feels are temporary): hitchhike traveling on a whim to visit friends in another province, taking up new skills and attending workshops (hunting, hide tanning, food canning), scheming/planning/fantasizing about large epic travels that will make me an even more interesting and experienced person (as if that has worked for getting female attention up until now). And telling myself that women are boring and not worth the effort (this is a coping mechanism, not something I actually believe). --Quincy Link to comment
sophie274 Posted October 4, 2012 Share Posted October 4, 2012 I'm single single. No dates, no romance, no kissing and certainly nothing more than that. Have been for almost a year this time, before that was single single for two whole years. (I dated a guy for four months last year, didn't end so well). I'll be honest. I'm actually really enjoying it now. I'm very busy at work, so I don't have too much time to sit around and feel lonely. I've signed myself up for activities that I enjoy and motivate me (running and scuba diving, right now). I plan really cool vacations where I get to do whatever I want, on my own schedule! I enjoy having my apartment as clean or as messy as I want and having the luxury of only thinking about myself. Of course I get lonely sometimes, and I'll feel wistful sometimes when I see cute couples together. But I have friends, family and pets, and that's already quite a bit of affection. I suppose I also feel confident that when the time is right, I'll meet someone who will make the wait worthwhile! Link to comment
cadmiumblue Posted October 5, 2012 Author Share Posted October 5, 2012 Yeah, I don't really have friends, my family is fractured. My pets are great but it would be nice if a human liked me. Oh well. Link to comment
robot20 Posted October 5, 2012 Share Posted October 5, 2012 Yeah I can relate to the having no friends part =/ Link to comment
Minx2012 Posted October 5, 2012 Share Posted October 5, 2012 You MAKE IT HAPPEN. The only thing that is stopping you from getting out there and making yourself available is yourself. Link to comment
cocoon2012 Posted October 5, 2012 Share Posted October 5, 2012 cadmiumblue,..before any relation one should become mature>>>maturity depends how a person responds to the circumstances or environment in an appropriate manner...do you think you are mature enough, independent and respons-able? Link to comment
cadmiumblue Posted October 5, 2012 Author Share Posted October 5, 2012 My sister is very immature, but she has relationships all the time. Link to comment
cadmiumblue Posted October 5, 2012 Author Share Posted October 5, 2012 It really bothers me to see people here post about their friends with benefits and sex questions when I can't even get someone to kiss me. I think that's what's really bugging me right now. It feels like nobody cares. People just want to talk about how they get a headache after their orgasm from another person and oh no what are they ever going to do. They should try living with no sex at all. I'd like for once any of them to just TRY living in my shoes for one day. No sex. No kissing. Nothing. Just day after day after day after DAY of NOTHING. A sexless person in a sex world. How fun. Link to comment
camus154 Posted October 5, 2012 Share Posted October 5, 2012 They should try living with no sex at all. I'd like for once any of them to just TRY living in my shoes for one day. No sex. No kissing. Nothing. Just day after day after day after DAY of NOTHING. A sexless person in a sex world. How fun. Pardon the ridiculously mundane analogy, but if I may.... Every fall I winterize my sprinkler system by having someone come and blow the lines out. Now, imagine if instead of picking up the phone, calling the sprinkler guy, and paying him to do this, I instead looked over at my neighbors each winter, wondering why their pipes never burst but mine always do. Winter after winter, I have to deal with a flooded basement while they blissfully carry on. If I were you, OP, I'd sit there and talk about how unfair life is. It's unfair that some people get all the luck and don't have to deal with burst pipes. It's unfair they sit cozy in their houses while I have to clean up a flooded basement. I even talk to them about it. Not to ask how they manage to avoid this problem, but simply to complain that their luck makes me resent them. It's not fair. The neighbors look at me, puzzled. Eventually they say, "Uh, do you know you need to winterize your sprinkler system? We have a person we can recommend for you..." But nope. I don't hear that. I just carry on, year after year, complaining about how unfair life is. This is you, OP. In each and every one of your threads. You're either choosing self-pity over getting off your butt and trying to change your life, or there's some psychological factor at play that is beyond the bounds of anyone here to address. If it's the former case, then enjoy it. If it's the latter, I would seek professional counsel. Link to comment
cadmiumblue Posted October 5, 2012 Author Share Posted October 5, 2012 Yeah, because the same number of people with burst pipes are 28 and never kiss anyone. I say kissing because kissing is the most basic thing. Not even sex, just so little as kissing. Are you really comparing my situation to having a pipe burst? Link to comment
cadmiumblue Posted October 5, 2012 Author Share Posted October 5, 2012 Also, are you comparing relationships to a sprinkler system? Link to comment
camus154 Posted October 5, 2012 Share Posted October 5, 2012 I give up. I think the real problem here is......much different than I thought initially. Link to comment
cadmiumblue Posted October 5, 2012 Author Share Posted October 5, 2012 Can you explain to me what that means? Link to comment
camus154 Posted October 5, 2012 Share Posted October 5, 2012 Nope. I won't. You're on your own, because at this point I really don't believe you're here for advice. Link to comment
cadmiumblue Posted October 5, 2012 Author Share Posted October 5, 2012 I think I better just let this thread go. It's off topic and I want to try to be good and avoid angering others. : ( Link to comment
agent1607307371 Posted October 5, 2012 Share Posted October 5, 2012 I have been celibate for a number of years. At times through choice and at other times not. Tbh, it doesn't worry me. No one has a right to love and romance and sex. Do you go out and meet people and make them feel good about being near you? If you aren't inviting to people then no, they won't go near you. Honeslty, do you even like people? Link to comment
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