How to get over an insecurity?

[JadeSmith]

Okay...I'm 22 years old. I thought I'd be over it by now, but I just can't let it go.

I know everyone has insecurities and you're your own worst critic.

But I just can't get over mine...and it's going to seem so stupid when I say what it is, but it eats me a live in most situations.

 

I'm not a vain person by any means, but I really do think I'm beautiful and carry myself very well. I think I'm above average and get compliments all the time from both female and males. So I don't ever think I'm down right ugly...I've never thought that.

But my main insecurity is my freaking PROFILE! I can't stand my nose! It is huge from the side! Perfectly fine from a front view, but I feel like when people view me from the side..they see a toucan beak sitting there.

 

I find myself never wanting to be in pictures unless it's frontal view only. In social situations I get uncomfortable if I'm the center of attention because people are viewing me from the side. If I'm talking to someone, I'm afraid the person accross from me is viewing my profile. That's how bad it is!!

I find myself talking with my hands to cover the side of my face sometimes just so the person next to me can't really get a good look at how big my nose is from the side.

 

I can't stand it...

I honestly feel like if I got my nose fixed, I would be perfect. That says a lot, no one can be perfect, but that's how I feel. If I got my nose fixed, I would feel so much more attractive.

 

And another thing is I'm female. It's just the way it's viewed in society...If I was a guy with this nose, I don't think I'd really care. It's masculine to have prominent noses and more accepted. But I'm a girl and definitely don't have the average female nose. It's not small at all.

 

I even go as far as to think of my wedding day...I see these beautiful pictures of the bride and groom kissing, and the picture is taken from the side and I get a pit in my stomach because I know one day that will be me, but I'm going to look horrible because of my freaking nose profile. I'd kill for a nose job, but I'm a college student. Can't afford it.

 

Has anyone ever been so eaten up by this kind of petty insecurity? I've never been made fun of for it...no one has pointed it out or anything. I've just always seen my nose in pictures and look at it constantly in the mirror and know it's ginormous from the side. So I don't know how the insecurity started, but it's been there since junior high for me. Although I did overhear a guy once say "Yeah she's really cute, but she has a big nose." He didn't know I heard him, but it absolutely killed me. Because that's how I feel. I feel cute, but with a big nose. Ugh..

 

I can't seem to get over it. It would just help me to know someone has the same insecurity or something else that eats at them on a daily basis. Do you think plastic surgery would be stupid if the insecurity is that bad? I just don't know...

[Capricorn3]

I'd kill for a nose job, but I'm a college student. Can't afford it..

Would your parents pay for it, or perhaps give you a loan?

[JadeSmith]

Would your parents pay for it, or perhaps give you a loan?

 

I honestly don't know if they would...I've never really let it out to anyone that I'm so insecure about it.

And I don't think banks do loans for cosmetic surgeries, do they? That or it's extremely hard to get approved...

 

I don't know. I have my days where I just accept it and embrace it. But I have other days like this where I can't stand it.

Sucks to feel down about yourself over something so stupid....but I can't fake out my feelings.

[Generation]

I remember hearing some great advice once when it comes to insecurities. If it's something you can't change it, feature it.

 

I have a few insecurities. But my biggest security is probably my height if we're talking about physical features. I've been told many times if only I were taller, I could be a model. I'm a guy, and taller guys are usually more successful, and I used to never think like that but it's becoming more apparent to me. My height affects me particularly at my work place because most of the girls are taller than me, and the ones who aren't wear heals so they're taller than me too. Whenever I have to speak to people, I usually have to look up. And at my other job, I work as security, so I do get pushed around often.

 

I have to carry myself with confidence. Whenever someone pushes me around, I know it's cause they think they can, so I'll try to disarm them verbally. For instance, working as security, if I don't let someone into the club and they're like "don't you know who I am?" I just say sorry, I'm a short guy, so I got short term memory, I don't know who you are. Crack a smile, and stand my ground.