6 Rules for a Man to Keep his Woman/Relationship Happy/Exciting

[EQIQ]

I would like to see what you guys think about this. These ideas came from a Brazilian website I visit from time to time, and it is focused on a man's point of view only. It looks at relationships as if it was a contract. A contract has clauses that must be followed, or the contract becomes void. We will call these clauses, rules, that must be obeyed. At any time the contract may be broken, undone, finished, you get the idea. When that happens, as sad as it may be, the person that got dumped (in this case we will be looking at it from the guy's side), has broken one or more of the rules of the contract.

 

FIRST AND FOREMOST THESE ARE NOT MY IDEAS!!! I AM JUST TRYING TO GET A HEALTHY DISCUSSION GOING!

 

I am translating here and maybe won't be able to capture the perfect sense of what is being presented, but I am just curious as to what you guys think of this. Men and women included.

 

RULE NUMBER 1.

 

The truth is that a part of the masculine community offers too much caring and love, etc. It is exaggerated. This posture is that of a business partner that is emotionally subjugated by its female partner. The consequence is that she will become negligent with her duties in the business, such as high quality sex, submission, respect, etc. This is because the male partner is way too attached, therefore with minimal risks of him rebelling, since he is an emotional slave. This in turn will cause her to be unsatisfied in the long term, and will motivate her to seek out other males that can submit her, lead her, protect her and entice strong emotions. Something that her male partner, who is highly predictable, domesticated and clingy/attached isn't offering her anymore.

 

RULE NUMBER 2.

 

It is the obligation of the male partner to give A LOT of sex to the female partner. There are no excuses for not fulfilling this obligation. All positions imaginable and unimaginable should be practiced. The female part should be dominated in bed, should feel like a mare being ravished by a stallion, powerful and relentless. If the male part of society is negligent with this obligation, the female may declare the revocation of the contract, both verbally and through a pair of horns that sprout mysteriously from her boyfriend's head (i.e cheating on him).

 

RULE NUMBER 3.

 

The male partner, because he is a man and therefore the leader of society, makes the final decisions and ultimately must ensure that the society does not become something boring, predictable and devoid of emotions. You will have to foster moments of fun and recreation, diversity and interesting. Walks in the park, travel, sports, sexual encounters in places where getting caught would mean a raise in adrenaline (adrenaline I said, not jail), etc. The female partner must feel that her life is much more fun and interesting while in the business, and that without it, she will die by drowning in a sea of ​​boredom. If the male part is careless with this function, the female may terminate the contract by virtue of their natural need to suffer emotional stimuli and get bored easily.

 

RULE NUMBER 4.

 

It is very necessary for the maintenance of interest by the female, that the male partner be an object of desire on the part of other women. The man should not stop the interest of others, on the contrary, he should encourage them whenever he can, dealing with other females in a confident manner, showing that any of them (any one that looks good, of course) may at any time, have the same privileges as the current partner, such as sex, attention, protection, leadership and other obligations. This is useful for two reasons. First, the female partner will feel insecure and threatened by the competition, always present of the other women. Which in turn will cause her to become more dedicated, dedication that materializes in sex, massages, blowjobs, obedience, respect, and everything else she can do to not lose her male to another female. Second, because the simple fact that her male partner is desired by others, makes her feel privileged and pleased to be envied by other women, something also to motivate her to meet all of her contractual obligations as a good girl.

 

RULE NUMBER 5

 

The male partner should always pay attention to his personal evolution, intellectually and professionally. The female members always appreciate a partner who is a very hard worker, scholarly, that thinks about the future, he plans his life, who wants to grow and progress. You must have professional ambition. No woman of value (hot/interesting) wants to form a business with a subject that is lazy/without professional ambition. When the male partner is ambitious and a hardworking professional, the female, her family, her friends will appreciate the business much more, which in turn will be more solid and stable.

 

RULE NUMBER 6

 

The male partner shall always keep a confident lead of the society. He is the leader, who should make decisions, provide reassurance, to act when necessary, be omitted when convenient, to say no when due, and to be tough speaking when the female does any mischief. Under no circumstances the male partner should leave the female to lead. If this happens, the business will be dissolved immediately, because the male party failed to fulfill its primary obligation: to be a man.

 

 

Again, THESE ARE NOT MY IDEAS!!! I AM JUST TRYING TO GET A HEALTHY DISCUSSION GOING!

[notimeman]

Saved.

 

A bit of a laundry list for us poor guys, there are generally women out there that make doing this easier so its not so ridiculous, but a great list nonetheless.

[Fudgie]

The list forgot to mention the importance of trying new activities/hobbies/things together. Doesn't have to include travel (although that's nice) but I think it's important to go out together and experience new things and share new hobbies together. That novelty really binds the relationship together and gives you new subjects to talk about. Too many people get stuck in a routine all the time. You don't even have to leave your house, maybe decide to watch a new TV series on Netflix together. It's fun.

[EQIQ]

The list forgot to mention the importance of trying new activities/hobbies/things together. Doesn't have to include travel (although that's nice) but I think it's important to go out together and experience new things and share new hobbies together. That novelty really binds the relationship together and gives you new subjects to talk about. Too many people get stuck in a routine all the time. You don't even have to leave your house, maybe decide to watch a new TV series on Netflix together. It's fun.

 

I think that is rule #3... he has to keep it interesting and fun.

[Fudgie]

Ah, that's right. I guess I just phrased it differently.

 

Just wanted to add that going out alone is not enough. If you go out to parks, that's cool, but if you go out to that park ALL the time, then it gets routine. So it's important to change it up.

[WhenWillILove]

This is a bit funny.

[DN]

Sometimes comedy writers just try too hard and their material, like this stuff, is just tedious instead of being funny.

[Donovan79]

I don't get the difference between 3 and 6. But I like the "stallion" part.

[RFB]

It's a bit funny but the guy trys too hard for satire. This is satire right because god help the poor guy if he's serious.

[swampyankee]

Gotta tell you, I can relate these "rules" to my first marriage. Not that I did any of it conciously, but that's how the relationship evolved over time. And I gotta tell you, i was always held in the highest esteem by the "female partner" Unfortunately, she became too dependent on the male leadership and didn't fulfill some of the female version of Rule #4 and this male was forced to break the contract.

 

I find myself violating Rule #1 in my present relationship though. I'm just too damned crazy for the female component to keep an edge there. I'll have to work on that.

 

lol

[rahulrocks]

hahahahahahahah hahahahahah ahahahahahahha ahahahhahahahahaha...

hohohohohohohohohohohohoho hohohohohohoh hohohohohoh hohohohoh........

heheheheheh hehehehehe hehehehe hehhehehehehehehe hehehehehe....

 

Someone please get me up, i am going to die laughing at this ridiculous post....hahahah...hjhahaha

 

One thing i am sure, the guy who wrote these rules has not had any relationship in his entire life......thats why he tried to find various ideas from dating sites and now imagining that by following these rules he will be able to have a long lasting relationship................

[rahulrocks]

Sometimes comedy writers just try too hard and their material, like this stuff, is just tedious instead of being funny.

 

It is very funny...the stupidity of it makes it funny...You see sometime we laugh at bad jokes then the good jokes...becasue those bad jokes are so stupid.

 

Disclaimer Sry EQ>IQ, no personnel assault on you. You have already written these are not your views.

[Angler]

I think there's some truth to what was written, but the translation from Portuguese to English, in the mind of a brazilian man, has made it much more dramatic.

[Ms Darcy]

I do hope that was satire.

[EQIQ]

Lol, I seriously have no issues with laughing at this lol. As I said I am just posting it here because I want to get a discussion going... and I was dying to see female ENA posters flaming hard lol...

 

Plus cuz I do think some parts of it carry some sort of truth... but yeah it is funny lol

[DN]

I am just posting it here because I want to get a discussion going... and I was dying to see female ENA posters flaming hard lol...lThat is not a good reason to post a thread on ENA - thread closed.