Glowguy Posted May 6, 2011 Share Posted May 6, 2011 Thank you for this. It has been hard to just breeze through a healing period especially when you saw a future with someone. I hold a lot of anger still about it. I'm also just now 31 and if I am to safely have kids before I'm 40, that's 9 years and a very small window of hope. I think perhaps all I'm meant to do is finish school and get a career but not much other than that. Those don't sound like the words of a lady ninja to me! Stop selling yourself short and don't let that jerk beat you down. Link to comment
thagator Posted May 6, 2011 Author Share Posted May 6, 2011 Thank you for this. It has been hard to just breeze through a healing period especially when you saw a future with someone. I hold a lot of anger still about it. I'm also just now 31 and if I am to safely have kids before I'm 40, that's 9 years and a very small window of hope. I think perhaps all I'm meant to do is finish school and get a career but not much other than that. My mom gave birth to my little sister at age 37 and she's fine. Keep your head up, you obviously deserve so much better than some creep who would go behind your back like that. He's not a man. Don't ever settle for less than you deserve. Good guys do exist, although it may not seem like it at times. Link to comment
ladyninja30 Posted May 6, 2011 Share Posted May 6, 2011 Those don't sound like the words of a lady ninja to me! Stop selling yourself short and don't let that jerk beat you down. Sorry you're right, and thanks. I'm still learning to pick my self esteem back up I guess. Ninjas are tough physically but not mentally... Link to comment
MakeItCount Posted May 6, 2011 Share Posted May 6, 2011 The cold girl who never showed you the love you showed her? Why do you want to go back to the girl who cheated? Why do you want to go back to the girl who you constantly did special things for, she hardly showed any happiness for it, but then when you did the littlest thing it was put under a microscope and you got the silent treatment for days which made you feel like the world's biggest jerk(my ex)? You just described my ex in a nutshell. * * * * that hits home man. Nicely said. Nice to see this happens to a lot of people. Ps. I wanna go down south and try some gator Link to comment
thagator Posted May 6, 2011 Author Share Posted May 6, 2011 You just described my ex in a nutshell. * * * * that hits home man. Nicely said. Nice to see this happens to a lot of people. Ps. I wanna go down south and try some gator Gator is delicious, if you don't mind the rough texture. You don't need to go south to try it, I can get it here in Chicago at certain places. Link to comment
MakeItCount Posted May 6, 2011 Share Posted May 6, 2011 Gator is delicious, if you don't mind the rough texture. You don't need to go south to try it, I can get it here in Chicago at certain places. Go canucks go Link to comment
thagator Posted May 6, 2011 Author Share Posted May 6, 2011 Go canucks go Haha won't work, I'm not a hockey fan. Huge basketball fan and if the Bulls lose to Atlanta I'm going to hide in a cave. Link to comment
MakeItCount Posted May 6, 2011 Share Posted May 6, 2011 Haha won't work, I'm not a hockey fan. Huge basketball fan and if the Bulls lose to Atlanta I'm going to hide in a cave. Hahahha, dammit! I don't care about NBA. Oh well, I tried. Link to comment
thagator Posted May 6, 2011 Author Share Posted May 6, 2011 Hahahha, dammit! I don't care about NBA. Oh well, I tried. You a football fan? I love my Bears but you can rip on them if you want. Link to comment
LostnConfused Posted May 6, 2011 Share Posted May 6, 2011 If you think about these things logically it makes sense. Then your stupid heart has to get in the way. Link to comment
May2011 Posted May 6, 2011 Share Posted May 6, 2011 If you think about these things logically it makes sense. Then your stupid heart has to get in the way. Yes! it happens to most Link to comment
thagator Posted May 6, 2011 Author Share Posted May 6, 2011 Lost and May, you are both correct. During a relationship you have a totally different view on your ex, if you love them it seems like they are perfect and do nothing wrong. Fresh after the break up, this holds true because you still love them. You can't stop loving them after one day, or one week, if ever. However, it takes time for you to really be objective and take off those "love goggles" and look at your ex as they really are, which usually is not as great as you thought they were. You might always still love them, but after a good amount of time and healing you might just love them as a person, but not love them in a romantic way. Make sense? Link to comment
TiredOfGames Posted May 6, 2011 Share Posted May 6, 2011 If you think about these things logically it makes sense. Then your stupid heart has to get in the way. I wish I could insert my brain directly into my heart and educate it a little to be less stupid. Link to comment
May2011 Posted May 6, 2011 Share Posted May 6, 2011 Lost and May, you are both correct. During a relationship you have a totally different view on your ex, if you love them it seems like they are perfect and do nothing wrong. Fresh after the break up, this holds true because you still love them. You can't stop loving them after one day, or one week, if ever. However, it takes time for you to really be objective and take off those "love goggles" and look at your ex as they really are, which usually is not as great as you thought they were. You might always still love them, but after a good amount of time and healing you might just love them as a person, but not love them in a romantic way. Make sense? Perfect sense. You've gotten pretty far with your healing. I rememeber your first post! Keep strong Link to comment
Success Posted May 6, 2011 Share Posted May 6, 2011 Good thread and very true. Realistically, I know I am much better off without my ex in my life and have nothing but upside from here. Only problem is the wound is still somewhat fresh. I know that I am too good for my ex and so does everyone else who knows us, yet for some stupid reason, part of me would take her back if she came back right now. For me it's all about having lost my self-esteem and I'm working hard to regain it. With time I know I'll be back in the saddle and I'll be saying, "Ex who?" Link to comment
ladyninja30 Posted May 6, 2011 Share Posted May 6, 2011 This is a good thread....things will probably work out for all of us sooner or later. Link to comment
LostnConfused Posted May 6, 2011 Share Posted May 6, 2011 This is a good thread....things will probably work out for all of us sooner or later. I agree. These forums in general have been a great help to me over the past few years. It really helps you feel "not alone". Link to comment
ladyninja30 Posted May 6, 2011 Share Posted May 6, 2011 Yeah, I've really liked being on here today as it is my ex's bday today.....that took me back a few steps in the healing process, everyone here seems great and supportive. I feel like I can't vent to my friends anymore because people can only say so much therefore anyone listening can only hear it so many times. I literally got told yesterday by a friend that she knows I'm hurting and welcome to vent but I haven't told her anything new in a while and therfore here I am in a forum meant to make you feel not alone. Link to comment
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