Weird night.....

[ny guy]

I have actually recently broken up with my g/f. The other night, I was celebrating a friends birthday, and a friend of a friend that I just met was showing a lot of interest in me (call the girl 'B'). B's friend told me that B liked me a lot off the bat. Cool!

 

 

So, we're out at a bar same night, and she is definitely chatting it up with me over the night. She also wanted to step outside to talk a bit alone in front of the bar. We didn't hook up outside the bar, but were just casually chatting.

 

The night progresses and it's time to go home. B came with the birthday people, but her car was at their house, which was a long way away. Somehow, I wound up driving her back to her car. I didn't mind, beautiful girl, long car ride....sweet! So we're driving, and we were using a GPS, but we wound up getting so lost because of a detail in the address we had was wrong. When we left the bar it was around 1:45. We were driving around, lost, for like almost two hours. We were trying to make the best of it. She was pretty chatty, so was I.

 

Then, we're still lost, and she seemed to be getting nervious. I had no idea about that area, so it was kind of the blind leading the blind. In the mean time, we were holding hands at some points, so I felt like she was not minding it so much.

 

I was getting tired, sometimes the conversation got awkward, but mostly it was cool. At the end of the night, when we finally got to her car, I could tell she was really tired and spent. She had to pee for awhile as well. During that drive, my recent breakup came up. I was pretty general about it, just saying it happened somewhat recently. I really wasn't looking for anything that night, nothing sexual. It wound up being a very awkward good bye. I leaned in for the kiss, and she let me kiss her, but there wasn't much reciprocation.

 

So, I got her number and I called it. She was like, are you making sure I didn't give you the wrong number?? I was like haha, it's just habit I guess. We then said good bye, and I followed her to a main road, and we went our separate ways. I texted her to tell me when she got home, and sorry for such a wild night. She texted back, but it was a very cold text, blasse, just said I walked in my house. So I joked, tell your friends to give better directions to us, and she joked back.

 

So, she asked if i was almost home, I wrote, Almost home. Get some rest, have a good night. It was great meeting you, hope to talk to you soon

 

 

So she replied 'Same here. Goodnite!'.

 

 

Part of me was like, huh? Sounds stupid, but I felt like I deserved more of something than just 'same here'. Like, thanks for driving for two hours in the middle of the night and getting me home safe. I know it wound up being a very weird situation, and maybe I said something that turned her off, but, to go from being super friendly to being cold as ice, very weird.

 

 

I haven't texted or called her today, don't plan to for a few days, I'm kind of insulted actually. Is this what the dating world is like? I think i'm in for a rude awakening.

[LDRohnos]

The dating world is full of people who play games. She might have just been really tired too =P

[ny guy]

I may have made one or more awkward comments, but for a really weird situation, I guess it is expected. Especially since i'm very rusty at this dating game now (and always haha). She may have been freakin tired, she didn't get home until 5:15AM, so that's understandable.

 

Feeling now is rejection. It was an up and down night, and I feel like the end of the night kinda overshadowed the entire night, left that bad taste in the mouth. I would have expected some sort of acknowledgement today though, like, thanks for driving to kingdom come blah blah blah....but then again, maybe she was put off by me or something I said.

[LDRohnos]

You know that saying that nice guys finish last...well often they do. When you do a favor for someone, especially one you just met, expect nothing from it.

 

She might be calling the random biker dude that she met from coming back from the bathroom or something. Not dropping ideas in your head but you get the gist of it.

 

Just call in a few days.

[stay_positive]

I wouldn't be so unsure so quick. It was an odd night involving getting lost at horrid hours. Just calm down. I would just give a couple days and see if she texts you or anything. If she doesn't you can then choose how to proceed. Keep us posted

[ny guy]

Here is the thing....

 

She had another ride to drive back to her car in, which was her ride to the bar as well. Her friend and friend's boyfriend had left to go back to his house, where her car was. I forgot exactly how it came up, but, she wound up coming with me and two other friends to go to the rest room in the bar.

 

She really had no reason to ride back with me, other than to hang out a bit more. Maybe that kinda clears it up, or confuses things more lol.

 

I'll call in a few days. If she doesn't call back, I'll take the hint.

[ny guy]

You know that saying that nice guys finish last...well often they do. When you do a favor for someone, especially one you just met, expect nothing from it.

 

She might be calling the random biker dude that she met from coming back from the bathroom or something. Not dropping ideas in your head but you get the gist of it.

 

Just call in a few days.

 

 

True, it was such a weird situation. I was actually kinda nervous on some of the roads we were driving on, it was really comical how we were literally driving in circles. And the reason for the mistake in our directions was because the road of the address ended in "and" and she thought it was 'awn'. It is hilarious now, but at 5 in the AM, just not as funny, haha.

[Ms Darcy]

Given everything you said, I think you are being presumptuous and oversensitive. I don't think wanting to get a ride from you means she's got to give you something more than a note of thanks. It was an awkward situation, maybe some attraction (maybe not), and really late at night. You also randomly start telling some girl you don't know well about your breakup and that you are not looking for anything sexual. Who knows what that means. I just think you need to be single for a while dude.

 

Anyway, I can see her telling her friends about this crazy night and saying "Is this what dating is like?" Try to look at this from another perspective.

[ny guy]

Good point. Touche.

 

I'm totally being over-sensitive about it, I know. As far as the break-up thing, I can't help that coming up, I forgot exactly how it did, but I didn't volunteer it myself. She probably asked about something like that, and I'm not going to lie about it. I'm bad at remembering conversational details, texts are easy though haha.

 

At the end of the day, it is what it is. I'll stop trying to figure out what she was/is thinking.

[SheBrokeMe]

Agreed... If you where concerned about starting something with this girl.. WHy bring up the ex? That just sends a flare up saying.. Your not over her, you need more time alone.

 

Not everyone wants to be a rebound

[ny guy]

Haha, so many things about this night just scream dumbarse on my part =).....Now, if I was really thinking, I would have been thinking we should just go our separate ways at the bar, leave that person interested in me/wanting to know more. You're right, I wouldn't want to knowingly be a rebound either. I'd be worried about that ex coming back in the picture, which I know likely isn't going to happen in the short or long term for me, but someone else wouldn't know that.

 

Shoulda, coulda, woulda......if I call, I'll update so someone else can learn from my rookie mistake =P

[ny guy]

So, called her tonight, and she called me back. Had a pretty good conversation, spoke about a few things. She seems pretty cool, very intelligent and driven.

 

Anyway, she brought up some important info. She told me that she had broken up from a 2.5 year relationship about 5 or so months ago, but was now having some thoughts about that. Sounds like second thoughts, and she wanted to be up forthcoming with that fact. I thought that was really good of her to tell me. I said that I don't mind and that I appreciate her letting me know. She also said she'd like to get to know me more, but just so i'm not blindsided if something happens.

 

Also, the awkwardness of the end of the night came up. She said she was sorry for not saying thanks for me driving her back home. Also, she said that she just felt so spent and a bit nausous from driving around so much. I guees i coulda figured that, but of course my mind was thinking whatever.

 

We said goodbye, she said she could call me when she was done with the gym tonight, but I have to get some sleep. I was, I'd like to hang out again. She seemed a bit reserved, which I know why now. She told me to text or call her tomorrow or whenever.

 

 

So, we'll see wherever it goes. Part of me wants to take her out before she makes the decision, just to see what happens. I also don't want to look like I'm ok with being on the hook. I know with the ex in the picture and her being so forthcoming, we know how this thing goes. So, gotta see how I can figure this one out.

 

It's all good =)

[ny guy]

Give me some advice on this one. I feel like I have three choices:

 

1) Pursue it, but possibly lose respect from her as I'm OK with being on the hook while she contemplates her ex.

 

2) Let her know that I'm down to hang out, but I won't bother her too much while the ex is in the picture.

 

3) Just stop pursuit at this point, as I've already been potentially friend-zoned.

 

 

She's very intriguing, interesting, and freakin gorgeous. But, I definitely sense some hesitation on her part. Also, I'm wondering if this is in response to me saying my peace. I highly doubt it, because she was mainly focused on herself, and didn't really talk about me.

 

Also, sounds like when I was on the phone, her ex left her something at her house. She was like, oo there's a package, then dismissed it after, saying it was from some 'glove box'. I'm in between option two and three.