Post here instead of contacting your ex!

[Mortrom]

I hate that you're doing better than me. I really hope you do miss me to some extent. But I really don't think you care about what I am up to.

[mines]

Loved our conversations, today.

 

First one, so serious. You admitted to being 'teary-eyed'. From something I'd sent you (last week, actually) via email. You even said we should have lunch together again, soon. The attraction is still so strong. I dreamed about you all weekend, two, maybe three different nights this weekend. Damn, I can't control my dreams. I work hard to control my thoughts during the day, but at night in sleep I am helpless.

 

I'm not a 'no contact' person. So perhaps I don't deserve 'healing'. Life is short and I am easy on myself. Sometimes suffering shows a person what is truly worthwhile. I won't email you tonight. I did pretty good over the Xmas holiday, only one email. I want to write you every night before bed....I want to, so badly.

But I have to move on. I have to pick up all of the pieces and keep moving forward. I have races to win and obstacles to overcome and I don't need to be loved....I'm good.

[pillowtalk]

I still love you, but I love myself more. I am going to move on.

[Starrgrl]

This too shall pass.

 

That's what I keep being told.

And finally, I'm starting to see that. I'm leaving all the sickening pain in the past.

All the stomach turning disappointment and uncontrollable hurt is now in the past.

 

 

Can't wait to be able to think of you and feel absolutely nothing.

[Einah1281]

I need to stop wondering when you are going to strike again. Its doing nothing for my healing....

[nessa7139]

That is the last time you sleep in my bed, the last time you tell me you love me and the last time I ever contact you...... I hope i eased your conscious over xmas. You have used me and I hate you for it!!!!

 

Remember____ what goes around comes around!!

[chikatita]

Matt, I loved you with all I had..You knew I was vulnerable and you made me believe that you loved me too..I sat through all your abuse..I sat with through night and early mornings on skype when you just needed somebody to talk to..I took you back after you went running back to your ex.. Together we were supposed to do so much..we had so much planned and then you turned your back on me..You ignored me when I told you I was crying, you ignored me when I told you I needed to talk..That was a week ago..I am on day 4 of no contact and I will not take you back ever again!..I feel sorry for the next person who becomes your victim!

[riot56k]

Hey, I found out you got into a new relationship. Congrats.

[D3adkl0wn]

(this has been almost said to my ex about 20 times today.. but i've fought the urge to make contact)

 

you were the one for me, I knew this from the moment we started talking and hanging out... I was aware of the difficulties that you were going through with your ex and his past abuses, but because I felt so strongly for you, I was prepared to be there for you through thick and thin and do whatever it took to get you through that point in your life.. I understand that you havent really dealt with these things because our relationship was going so well and you didnt want to become a downer on things.. however when you proceed to allow these things to build up to a point where it destroys something that even yourself said was amazing, It really hurts.. Why couldnt you just talk to someone more regularly, Why couldnt you talk to me, WHY was it that when I was clearly wanting to help YOU, all you did was push me away until my reactions to that caused more problems for you?!

 

I absolutely love you, and I miss you like crazy.. If i could do anything for you to help mend things I would, and you know that..

 

The hardest part is knowing that you are still just dealing with it in the same way you did before.. just distracting yourself from the problem until you feel okay enough to carry on, without really resolving anything in the meantime, or doing anything productive at all for that matter.. I worry about you because of this.. Before you were living with family and they were there to make sure you ate and took care of yourself.. but now that you're on your own, I'm afraid that you wont have that kind of support and you'll suffer more because of it.. I just wishj that you'd talk to a professional about the things he did to you far more regularly than you are.. they can help.. you just have to give them a chance.. but seeing a doc once a month isnt cutting it babe..

 

its been almost 2 weeks and I want like crazy to call you and talk to you.. to try and talk some reason into your mind that this was not the way to handle things, because now you've got nothing to rely on but pothead friends and people who are telling you to drink to solve your problems.. It scares me that, by the time you work this all through and get somewhere, It'll be too late.. too late for us.. too late for anything other than this..

 

but i cant call, I cant txt, I cant visit.. because those are the things that might just drive you further away.. but I want to know if you are feeling this pain too over my not being around.. is this affecting you at all? I cant tell.. and its' killing me..

[mishcka]

People like you, are really weird. It seems so easy for them to throw good things away: i was so into you, I was so in love with you, and I dont like it when you say you know. I know you know. you ran out way too quickly, and you know what, I dont want to be your friend, but i dont seem to be able to function without thinking about you. then again, you left me when i needed you the most. you know with everything that was going on in my life. you broke up with me when i had but few pennies on me. So yah people like you dont deserve people like me. You may never regret your decision, you may even think it's the best you ever took. But hmmm, no, it was the best decision for me, and you took it for me. I'd never leave a man i loved. you took the burden for me, and you did set me free. of all the things that you wanted me to be. I love you but I have to think of reasons to hate you. maybe one day i'll become netural toward you, and then maybe, who knows, some how, we can become friends again. I know you dont care. so I wont be contacting you for a long while, dear you, let's see if you'll notice.

[miss bear]

I haven't seen you in since our coffee shop run in last month. Here's how I am doing if you care. I still miss you and I wish I didn't.

I am seeing a therapist now and she is trying to help me see how someone as smart and wise and emotionally mature as I am could have fallen fro someone like you. I can't understand it myself, you are not all that, you are bald and hairy in all the wrong places, you have no communication skills, you do nice things for everyone so they will like you, you don't read, you run away from any problem and pretend they don't exist. You weren't funny.

 

Let's be clear here I was the gem of our relationship you should consider yourself lucky to have ever had someone like me fall in love with you. You rejected as close to perfect a girl as you will ever have.

Why I am still upset about someone like you kills me. You completely showed complete lack of respect for me in your actions during the break up process, yu could have made this better, I gave you every chance to make this easier, but you chose to treat me as if I didn't matter at all.

You claimed to want friendship then put no effort into trying to be a friend and then dropped any pithy effort you put forth once you decided to get in a relationship with her.

No wonder I never really met any friends of yours, YOU NEVER REALLY HAD ANY, only minor acquaintances you called friends. You are not capable of having a true friendship, you don't know how to be real.

You had the chance to make this right and have this end with dignity and kindness, instead you chose to have me hate you.

A day will come when you will fall apart again and you will realize you pushed someone out of your life who truly loved you and was wonderful, and I will not be around to help you pick up the pieces.

[dedem]

I want to contact my ex (it's only been two days), so badly. I want to throw myself at his feet and beg him to at least remain friends. But that will strain relationships further... it's so hard for me to wait the 30 day limit I've imposed. He wants to be friends, sure. But the spark he said died? It didn't die in me.

 

I also want to rant and scream at him. I want to kill him for what he's done. He friggin' KNEW I had trust issues. He KNEW I couldn't bear it if he left me. He broke it off anyway. Was i too crazy for you? Was the real me not good enough? Don't feed me that line of BS that I'm beautiful, I'm guessing it's my looks and my depression, which, by the way, THANK YOU for making it worse.

 

You said nothing I could do or say would make you hurt me. And you TRIED not to hurt me when we broke up, or so you said. Well you've done a dang good job about it. I'm crying, been crying for two days, can't eat, can't sleep, am having anxiety attacks left and right... how could you do this, and then say you care? You don't care. People who care don't cause pain and suffering on this scale. I was in a fetal position for half an hour today, and then refused to come out of the bath until my family forced me. You've broken me. I hope you think I killed myself. I hope it torments you for the rest of your life-you never really cared. Ever. You only thought of yourself and your insecurity about being a virgin... I'm so glad I never had sex with you, it would make this so much more harder.

 

Am I to suppose that your once-love was never really love as well? Go suffer, you worthless pathetic sack of nothing. I seriously hope that fate decides you're better off dying in a hole then ever finding happiness... and I'll leave you with one last question. What am I to make of it when you leave me and say you weren't right for me, after being so sweet? Are you really that selfish?

[Starrgrl]

T. I AM SERIOUSLYYYYYYY feeling myself slowly starting to move on. OMFG. Does this feel good.

[miss_sunshine86]

what kind of coward bastard dumps a girl by hanging up on her in the middle of a conversation after knowing her for 5 years. no point in saying this to you because it wont change anything because you dont have feelings to care

[dedem]

I sit alone and watch the clock

Trying to collect my thoughts

All I think about is you...

I never have the things to say

To make it all just go away

It all just goes straight back to you..

 

This has to be the millionth time I've posted.

 

I don't know what to do anymore. I've been crying like crazy and nothing works. I got no sleep tonight. None. I just want my kitty man back... all these empty promises, all this hurt... why the heck did you do this to me? How could you do this to me? I don't know if I'll ever heal from this. I need you and I'd do anything for you. I'd forget this just please love me again. You say you love me as a friend... you don't love me. You never cared, you never gave a damn if I was sad or happy or any of it. You didn't bother trying to make it work. You said you did, but you only lied to my face and then just couldn't do it. If you cared for me at all, why couldn't you do it? Am I too ugly, too depressed, just not meant for you? I can't be like this every minute of every day. It hurts too bad... how could you say I was your love, your everything, just to throw it all away? I guess i'll never hear you say my love again. I'll never hear you say that you love me. I will never get that day that's focused on me... I won't even have you around for my birthday.

 

You were afraid I was gonna hurt you if things went bad. Well, I was terrified of you leaving me... and now that you've broken my trust and have, there's just not an explanation in the world that will ever heal me... I don't know what to do please kitty man come back to me... forget your pride, forget your stupid rationality... just love me...

[arrowheart]

I'm still in love with you and you know it. I told you this. I realize I was the one who broke things off because I wasn't sure of our future together. I thought I deserved someone better. I may have hurt you, but you didn't show any emotion. After thinking things over for several weeks, I was certain that it is you that I want to spend the rest of my life with. You were always so patient with me, so understanding, you were there when I needed you. I remember sitting next to you on the couch, cuddling up, all I could think about was how much I wanted that moment to last forever. I was so comfortable with you, I can be me, I don't have to put up any walls when I'm with you, I don't have to hide, I can let you see the real me. I know you love me too... We talked about our future together and the possibility of getting married next year, and somehow that scared me. I wasn't ready. I was afraid of making a mistake, and I backed out of our relationship. But now I know I'm not making a mistake. Not marrying you would be the mistake because I know I'll never be able to forget you, and I doubt I'd ever be able to love another man as I love you. I told you that I'm ready, but you turned me down. I guess I deserved it. Of course you wouldn't let me off the hook so easily. I'm still hoping for us to get back together. Sometimes you give me the silent treatment, and honestly I'm tired of missing you like I'm missing you right now. I'm tired of wondering if you'll call today or not. When are you going to take me back? Better yet, don't take me back as your girlfriend, just propose already.... you already know what the answer's gonna be. Quit torturing me... I know it's fun for you... but not for me... urgghhh!!!

[shamone]

deer ex,

 

i hate what you have become, and i thank you sarcastically for wasting 4 years of my life

 

good ridiance

[dedem]

Why did you bother with me... why did you lie to yourself, did you ever realize that it would hurt me more? Did you ever think of me?

 

You tried hard to get my love. You broke me, my heart... and then you say that I "have to go on"? Your last reply to me was more hurtful then helpful... you lied to me in order to get my love. Now your whole mind has changed and I just don't know what to do... you hurt me too badly this time. You KNEW how hard it was for me to trust, to put my love, heart and soul into anyone. To crush me like this... you didn't really care did you. And then to go on to say you only want my happiness and that this is the best way to make both of us happy in the long run... only YOU are going to benefit from this. Because it's so easy for Mr. I Don't Care to forget his feelings and think rationally. Maybe I should have left you the MOMENT i realized you thought way more than you had to. You can take your promises, your ****ing gifts to me, and just get out of my life. I won't forget you. I will never like you. I don't know if we can be friends ever. So stop saying goodbye. Stop saying anything at all. Just leave me alone before you actually do cause me to commit suicide, in my manic-depressive state I almost did and you were VERY lucky my friends snapped me out of it.

 

You're right, we're not alike. I wouldn't hurt someone like this under a false pretense of helping them. So goodbye Mr. Thinker. Goodbye and good luck finding someone to replace me because you damn sure ****ed everything else up.

[markyspark]

You spent too much time being your mums puppet..we have a child together, who you have not let me see, and hve blocked all attempts so far for me to see her..

 

Why does this hurt?

 

I'm still caught up on you, and I do love you, for you, not just for our daughter - You may have been my 2nd only relationship, but I knew you were something special..you let your family do all the thinking - theres not room for 3 people in a relationship, it just gets kinda messy - I tried to do everything the right way round, when I moved in, but that wasn't "good enough"..my way was always the wrong way, even when in some cases it was the only way...

 

I know I ended things, but you refused to stand up to your mum...If the boot had been on the other foot that afternoon, I would have given my mum what for, whether you deserved it, or not..but no..you just sat there, and let her tear into me..that annoyed me more than anything..you then had the cheek to say I didnt love you..I gave up a decent career for you(given the roles I almost ended up with when the section I worked for got the big finger) I almost lost friends and family over you, i finally got off my backside and finished my driving lessons, I decided to have a baby with you, we talked about a future together..a future with you, me and our little baby daughter..

 

I know we did the Ross and Rachel thing a few times, during the pregnancy - but can you not see, I cared for you enough, to throw myself at any menial job for you just to make ends meet - its just that once you've worked in a blue-chip financial company, no supermarket will take you on as a shelf stacker..and its not as if I could have wiped 6 years off my CV! - I was strong enough to weather the storm, but could only do so much...

 

I know you hurt..I hurt too...but if I'd have told you that I couldn't stand the interference - that would have ended things sooner. You need to stand up to your mum, as she will dictate every part of your life if you let her, and your life will never be yours..and you'll never be truly happy...

 

I hope if we do get another chance (for us, and not just the sake of our child) - that you will have wisened up, and that may have helped things...but maybe not..But rest assured..where our child is concerned, the fight is far from over

[iBroken]

Your Boyfriend looks like he rides the short bus to class. But im confused because he looks older than your dad.

 

LOL. Way to solve for your daddy issues. Lets just start sleeping with his friends.

 

You look ugly in your pic. Your smile is so fake it shoulda been photoshopped.

 

Your are still nothing but a messed up skank.

 

Deuces girl.

 

Oh and merry xmas to you too. *****.

[Starrgrl]

Tomorrow is 1st of January, can't wait for the new year. I'm emerging a new me.

[Starrgrl]

PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE.

You've done enough damage.

[Yostina]

You said you weren't comfortable when we were broken up. You said you didn't forget about us. You said you know you did me wrong and still doing it. But you don't seem to realize the deep heartache that you're causing to me. You are literally indifferent. Showing that you're sorry for what you did to me, apologizing and trying to mend the heart of mine that you cruelly broke for no reason, doesn't literally mean we have to get back together, but shows that you still have a heart and regret what you did to me because you know I don't deserve it. But you're too stubborn, too immature, too selfish, too arrogant to do such honorable thing.

 

My head is done with you, but my heart is not yet. I don't know why I still keep coming back to you. I don't know why I still hope for a chance with you. A chance to love you. A chance to prove that no matter what ugly moments we went through, it still can work. I keep ignoring my self worth and respect, I keep ignoring my pride. I strongly believe it doesn't mean that I'm worthless or I have no confidence in myself because I do it for the sake of love. I'm devoted to my feelings for you, not specifically you. But I know you don't realize it this way because you don't have a pure heart and mind. And since you don't value my love and sincerity, I can't do nothing but leave.

 

I took so long to believe that you really are a liar, and not worth my love. I couldn't and didn't want to believe it. But it's reality. I was blinded, but I have opened my eyes to your true colors.

 

Believe me. I want you more than anything in my life, even as friends. But you stole away every chance of this happening because what you did to me will never leave me. I can't forgive you. It's painful with or without you, but I'd rather suffer without you than take your crap and help you get rid of the guilt within you.

 

This time, it's now, or never...

[Aether]

There are so many things that it seems you will never understand, the most important one being that I gave up everything for you and it seems like you never appreciated that. You knew I was shy, you knew I had little confidence, but did you try to help me? Imagine it if you can, put the boot on the other foot as I have, you give up your life and move to a different country with a different culture and ridiculously different language and and you are met with no support, drawing a map for me and marking different spots on it to me is not support, I do appreciate that, but where did we ever go together? What did you show me? What did you do to really make th place feel like my home? After I had not even been there a year you dump me, how long do you think it takes someone to integrate and get over culture shock when they make a move like this? Do you understand how that feels? You never have...you claim that you did, that being at university was exactly the same, you came to my country with nothing but a suitcase, but you were surrounded by other people in teh same boat and you cannot call bs on that, ask your sister in law for her opinion and you'll see just how false that reasoning is, yoru sister in law and your brother, oh yes they were in the same country too weren't they...oh how much easier it would have been for me if I had my sister there with me! You spoke the language! You went to an english school and were taught that language from an early age...I never had that! You adapted quickly, you admitted that yourself, but I am not you, you could not expect me to adapt and fit in in teh same way or timeframe that you did, that was just not fair. So after less than a year you end it, I refused to walk away, I didn't want to give up because I loved you, I never came to you on a whim or just to "see what happens", what would be the point in that? I came because I loved you and I thought you loved me too, perhaps you did.

 

You said you couldn't give me any promises and I accepted that, whether I should have or not..well the jury is still out on that one. Still you carried on giving little in the way of support, I tried, I really did, I asked for your help with the driving license and you just shot it down, I asked for your help with language and you just ignored that, when did you ever tell me that you loved me? I mean in person, after I actually got there? It may not have been what you do but how else do you expect me to know that you cared about me? or that you did in fact love me? You would share those words with me all the time before I moved to be with you, in texts, online, on vent...why could you not say it to my face? How can you not understand that the less I got from you the more depressed and alienated I became? I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you, I wanted to be special to you, I wanted you to be proud that you were with me, happy that you were with me but you just didn't seem able to show that, at least not to me. Everything that went wrong with us was triggered by these things but it seems that you were just not willing to put in the effort to help me with this, I cannot live in your life, I had nothing of my own, only you, you can't have expected me to just give up everything move to a different country/culture and just build a life for myself ON MY OWN from scratch, especially considering the difficulty I had making friends even in my own, I needed your HELP! I needed your SUPPORT! I needed your ENCOURAGEMENT! Why could you not give this to me? I tried for you, I had a job that I lost because you could not help me with one thing!

 

So much that I remember, how can you have such a negative reaction to someone showing you affection? I love to care for people and while I know not everyone appreciates it I've never had a negative rection to stroking anybody's hair before, or touching their face, how could I be loving? How could I kno whow to approach or taklt o you about anything when I never knew how you would react? This is how I display my affection for someone in a relationship, you cannot be surprised that I became defensive and depressed. All the time you blame me for everything that went wrong, that there were crumbs in the toaster..which is actually quite a common thing among toasters! How the hell do you think all of this made me feel?! And then at the end, when I come to you and tell you how unhappy I am in november it leads to a breakup, do you think thats what I wanted? I was left thinking this whole time that it was a mutual decision, I was a fool, after what you said to me on wednesday, after I bared my soul with honesty and grace and respect you crushed me with the knowledge that I had left because it is what you wanted! How can you be so cruel and cold and just downright disrespectful to someone who gave up SO much for you! MY LIFE! I think back to when you dumped me in the summer and what you said to my initial reaction "if you had never come here then we would never had had a chance, we never would have known" what teh * * * * ? Do you think I came to see how things would go, do you honestly thinkthat I would have chucked my life away and taken such a massive and terrifying step on a whim?! Would you have come to my country?! Do you understand what that said to me!? On Wed you acted with nothing but selfishness and cowardice, you are not the man I met last year, you are not the man people think you are, so many people have so much respect for you, I did too! I would have fought to the death for you! I do still love you, I really do, even though I'm a knob for doing it...your true colours have disappointed me beyond belief...

[kate1985]

Today has been a rollercoaster. One minute, I'm happy...the next, I'm in pain. I bet you're spending NYE with her...maybe a new year kiss. Maybe tonight will be the night the two of you fall in love. Please don't... What about me? How could you say you loved me and then just leave me for her??? I hate you...

 

Are you gonna text me tonight? Will you wish me a happy new year? Probably not...you're having waay too much fun with her. You probably forgot all about me. If you're expecting me to contact you tonight...don't hold your breath. I want you out of my life. I want to pretend that you never happened...this was all just a dream, or maybe a nightmare.

 

I promise you that I will move on. I will find someone who deserves me...and I believe with all my heart that you and your new "friend" won't last forever. And then you'll coming running back to me. But it'll be too late. I will move on. I will be happy. Sure...you seem happy with her for now, but forever is a long time, my friend.