She likes to take it slow... uh oh

[NW BlD]

So Friday night I had a party at my house. There was this girl there that a recently visited along time ago at a kickback. Well about mid way through she just utterly attacked (in a good way) me. She was also pretty damn druck I honestly didnt know what was going on, but went with the flow. She ended up spending the night we only got as far as shirts off.

 

Saturday her friend tells me she definity could be interested but she likes to take things slow. I personally haven't heard this from her this is just what her friend said.

 

Now I am just confused I don't want to rush into things but I don't want to be played, used, maniuplated or anthing else. It's now Tuesday and I haven't really had the nerve to call her and talk to her straight up. I can come off as insecure and needy sometimes on the phone and that's the one thing that will send her running.

 

Any advice all is welcomed.

[flash83]

shes either interested or not - waiting a little longer to call her won't change that now.

 

if you dont want to be played, manipulated or anything don't let a girl attach you like that and spend the night together with shirts off.....

[strategos]

Yeah, I agree. Your call will not determine whether she's initially interested or not. Just call her, find out what's up? and if possible find out if you could hang out with her that's all. It's really that simple.

[pinkrobot]

she likes to take things slow. I personally haven't heard this from her this is just what her friend said.

 

So call her up, ask if she wants to go do something, and find out for yourself. I would take anything other people tell you about her with a grain of salt. You'll never know what she really wants unless you take the initiative to see her again.

[waveseer]

Slow in what way? Clothing has already been removed, I think it's safe to eat and play in public together.

[HouseKitten]

I would take anything other people tell you about her with a grain of salt.

 

Ditto on this. I started dating the brother of a girl I worked with once and then found out that she'd told him I was looking to settle down! I'm not averse to the idea or anything, but we'd only been out twice, I wasn't looking to rope him into a marriage already

 

Just call her, ask her out and see what you think for yourself.

[NW BlD]

Easier said then done. I think she means taking it slow in terms of dating or iunno. One of two things could have happen... She was drunk and didn't know what she was doing and now could be regreting it or she is actually interested, usually with my luck it's going to be the first option. It just I really don't wanna mess this all up, being pushy and up in her grill. The fact that she is white and I am black kindof baffles me too. Nonetheless I think the taking it slow is another way of saying "I'm not ready for a relationship and your gonna have to wait until I am." Which is something I just don't do. Has anyone else been told this, or told someone this and it actually worked out?

[Capricorn3]

She was drunk and didn't know what she was doing and now could be regreting it?

That was my initial thought too and I have no doubt she feels embarrassed, foolish and regretting her behaviour. I say give her time to cool off and get over it. Try approaching or making contact in a couple of weeks time. She may even contact you earlier, IF she is interested in you.

[ghost69]

you are overanalyzing and psyching yourself out from making a move. call her up and find out.

[oldenoughtoknow]

I agree you're over thinking this thing. It's been a few days since you last saw her. Don't worry about what she wants. Women will say things like that to throw guys off course. Be the man. Give her a call and tell her what YOU want.

[shikashika]

Call her.. but, from a female (well, my) perspective, I would NEVER tell a guy I want to take it slow if I was truly interested.

 

"I want to take it slow" would be my translation for "I'm not sure if i'm really that interested in you".

[NW BlD]

Well I called her around 11:30ish she didn't answer I also texted her about 2 hours later and so far nothing. This is first time she didn't answer the phone. So I really think Friday night was a fluke now. Dammit oh well at least I had a good time think imma call once more tonight around 8 ish. This waiting sucks.

[flash83]

Well I called her around 11:30ish she didn't answer I also texted her about 2 hours later and so far nothing. This is first time she didn't answer the phone. So I really think Friday night was a fluke now. Dammit oh well at least I had a good time think imma call once more tonight around 8 ish. This waiting sucks.

 

pretty certain there is no interest, sorry to hear.

[shikashika]

Well I called her around 11:30ish she didn't answer I also texted her about 2 hours later and so far nothing. This is first time she didn't answer the phone. So I really think Friday night was a fluke now. Dammit oh well at least I had a good time think imma call once more tonight around 8 ish. This waiting sucks.

 

 

dont' call again.... you've contacted her twice now.

 

Her turn.

[Mustang]

Woah woah woah. DON'T call her. In this case, I would ease back into it by sending her a TEXT. Make it light hearted, playful and non-commital. Make a joke about something you spoke about the other night. Make it different. Don't just say "hey. How are you?". Something along the lines of: "Guess who has just made the most amazing sandwich in the history of sandwiches..."

 

If she responds, great... take it from there. If she doesn't, you've not really lost anything and you can kind of get the idea.

 

Being too into her at this stage is a bad move if people have told you that she wants to take things slow. Build comfort first.

[Mustang]

Then again, what the * * * * do I know? Read my stories...

[flash83]

the above posts are right, ZERO contact unless she contacts you.

 

she sees your missed call, she has your text .. what more does she need to know you want to talk to her?

[drewciouS281]

well stop being pushy and needy cause thats how you chase them away. In my experiance when a woman says they want to take things slow, it means that they are possibly interested in something serious but want to take it slow and not rush so everything falls into place the right way. Do not be needy. Big turn off to women! My roomate was pushy and needy with women and i kept lecturing him but he didnt listen and kept losing women. Now he goes a bit slower and has had better luck.

[NW BlD]

She did text me back saying she just woke up, I can't help feeling that there is some spark but I just don't know what to do with it. She herself hasn't said anything about wanting to take it slow. I asked her if she wanted to kick it tonight but so far no response so back to waiting I guess. I think imma just give her about two more chances before I throw in the towel. Thanks so much for all your guys input and time.

[flash83]

She did text me back saying she just woke up, I can't help feeling that there is some spark but I just don't know what to do with it. She herself hasn't said anything about wanting to take it slow. I asked her if she wanted to kick it tonight but so far no response so back to waiting I guess. I think imma just give her about two more chances before I throw in the towel. Thanks so much for all your guys input and time.

 

you gotta be more uptight with giving chances. for me its 1 strike and you're out in the early stages.