BrunetteBarbie Posted April 10, 2009 Share Posted April 10, 2009 thats beyond the point, see your mind went straight into 'date date date i gotta be dating!!' no, you live your life the way you want to and dont worry at all about dating, when you cross paths with anyone then it will be naturally and then you will naturally get to know them, and then you can consider going or asking out on a date. but all this 'snag' dating style that is soo popular these days is extremely overrated and adds to the idea that you have to be constantly looking for someone to be with or else--- its complete crap. I agree 100% with this and more ppl should think like that.. Link to comment
velvette Posted April 10, 2009 Share Posted April 10, 2009 I asked my guy out. p: 10/10 personality is REALLY high. if someone really was like that, I'd be fine with 0/10 looks lol. but it's very unlikely to have that combination, as I find the way someone looks often affects their personality. eg if you're ugly kids probably picked on you and then you became reclusive, bitter, etc. the only way there's a person with 10/10 personality and 0/10 looks is if a decent looking person got hit by a bus. and, well, if my bf got hit by a bus, I wouldn't leave him! Link to comment
grymoire Posted April 10, 2009 Share Posted April 10, 2009 thats beyond the point, see your mind went straight into 'date date date i gotta be dating!!' no, you live your life the way you want to and dont worry at all about dating, when you cross paths with anyone then it will be naturally and then you will naturally get to know them, and then you can consider going or asking out on a date. but all this 'snag' dating style that is soo popular these days is extremely overrated and adds to the idea that you have to be constantly looking for someone to be with or else--- its complete crap. i was like that when i was 21. and now i regret for not taking my life seriously.... i was just living my life when my friends were serious about finding a girlfriend... they are all married and settled now while i am 33 and have been eternally single..... Link to comment
EQD Posted April 10, 2009 Share Posted April 10, 2009 i was like that when i was 21. and now i regret for not taking my life seriously.... i was just living my life when my friends were serious about finding a girlfriend... they are all married and settled now while i am 33 and have been eternally single..... *shakes head* that doesnt make alot of sense. i think your dilemma is that finding a woman to hug and screw has infiltrated every single thought that you can come up with. if i say burn a CD of the Twister soundtrack you would say "but that wont help me find a girlfriend" The problem is whether you want to admit it or not your mind is stuck in this state, and in order to find contentedness that needs to change. Link to comment
grymoire Posted April 10, 2009 Share Posted April 10, 2009 *shakes head* that doesnt make alot of sense. i think your dilemma is that finding a woman to hug and screw has infiltrated every single thought that you can come up with. if i say burn a CD of the Twister soundtrack you would say "but that wont help me find a girlfriend" no need to snub me EqD... my problems are my own.... to laugh at them is pretty rude of you.... i am sure you won't be saying these things if you were single all your life.... you are 21 and have an awesome relationship... that's why you think its not a big deal...... if you didn't have it i am sure your posts would sound very different. Link to comment
EQD Posted April 10, 2009 Share Posted April 10, 2009 no need to snub me EqD... my problems are my own.... to laugh at them is pretty rude of you.... i am sure you won't be saying these things if you were single all your life.... you are 21 and have an awesome relationship... that's why you think its not a big deal...... if you didn't have it i am sure your posts would sound very different. first of all: i wasnt 'laughing' at you. the way you feel about life is a simple state of mind. you should try and understand that being in any relationship no matter how good isnt an ultimate key to a higher state of happiness. life is about you. what you should notice in all of your posts is that you continuously revert to this 'since i dont have a gf i wont be happy' attitude. and its EASY to get to that state, everyone does it. But we were all miserable doing it. happiness is a state of mind. so is sadness. whats a real trip is that you have the power to change it if you wanted to. ask yourself why you choose not to. Link to comment
grymoire Posted April 10, 2009 Share Posted April 10, 2009 it also surprises me to no end when i see some women constantly thinking only about sex. they complain all the time that men have only sex in their mind... but lots of women seem to be the same way... i have seen so many times here in ENA whenever a guy says he is interested in dating a girl the females here immediately say 'he wants to get into her pants'... now i am being told here that i want a girlfriend to hug and screw... yikes... why is it only about sex? and why the hypocrisy? is the only thing a girlfriend can do is provide physical pleasure? i am sure if a guy came on here and said he wants a girlfriend to hug and screw the women of ENA will come with fire in their mouths and tear him down in no time for being so shallow... and then turn around and do the same thing.. Link to comment
Ac143 Posted April 10, 2009 Share Posted April 10, 2009 What I feel is...regardless of what you do/say/think/anaylze to death about dating that one person will come into your life when YOU are ready. Meaning when your whole life doesn't revolve around dating or who will I ask out or go out with next or why dont I have someone?. There is no need for a "formula" or some kind of technique. These words are pretty simple "just live YOUR life" but they are so freakin powerful. I was so happy being single when I met my SO. I was actually delcaring myself a bacholette for life & loved every minute of it. I never thought of men or dating, things just happened & I believe they happened because I was living my life just for me, what I wanted, where I wanted to be, what I wanted to do & NONE of it involved a man. IDK...that's just how I feel about the whole dating thing. This is where I think confidence comes into play too...I was always able to sense when a man wanted a relationship or out looking depeserately for one even by talking to him for 5mins. That usually turned me off. Link to comment
grymoire Posted April 10, 2009 Share Posted April 10, 2009 Since men HAVE TO approach women you have the luxury of not trying and just enjoying your life. You will be approached by some dude. I am a guy. Women do not approach men. I know there are exceptions but we are not talking about exceptions here. If I choose to quit trying and just enjoy my life then after 5 years I would have to come back to ENA and say that I am still single. And btw, why do many people think that I am only thinking about finding a girl 24*7? who told you that? Link to comment
velvette Posted April 10, 2009 Share Posted April 10, 2009 EQUESTRIANDYNAMO (lol quite a mouthful) speaks wise words. you have to be happy being single first. women DO approach men. --people approach each other. not necessarily with dating in mind, but things grow from friendships. you are not that old, grymoire. you just have to go about things in a different mindset. there is nothing wrong with being single. most people find their SO when they're not looking, so I've heard. Link to comment
Ac143 Posted April 10, 2009 Share Posted April 10, 2009 Since men HAVE TO approach women you have the luxury of not trying and just enjoying your life. You will be approached by some dude. I am a guy. Women do not approach men. I know there are exceptions but we are not talking about exceptions here. If I choose to quit trying and just enjoy my life then after 5 years I would have to come back to ENA and say that I am still single. And btw, why do many people think that I am only thinking about finding a girl 24*7? who told you that? LOL I dont think you are thinking about it 24/7! But how often do you think about it, honestly? thoughout any given day.... Like EQ said its all a mindset. I think it is different for men but not entirely. If you put into play the whole I'm living for me & dont care about dating - I bet you will find it a lot easier & probably the right girl. & this doesn't mean you shouldnt talk to women at all either lol. You dont always have to ask women out, sometimes it happens at the strangest times! Sorry I know that might not make sense... Its so hard to explain online cause Im not very good with writing in the middle of work lol. Link to comment
EQD Posted April 10, 2009 Share Posted April 10, 2009 i said 'hug' first grymoire lol. its not like i just said sex. stop taking me so seriously. Link to comment
grymoire Posted April 10, 2009 Share Posted April 10, 2009 LOL I dont think you are thinking about it 24/7! But how often do you think about it, honestly? thoughout any given day.... Like EQ said its all a mindset. I think it is different for men but not entirely. If you put into play the whole I'm living for me & dont care about dating - I bet you will find it a lot easier & probably the right girl. & this doesn't mean you shouldnt talk to women at all either lol. Sorry I know that might not make sense... Its so hard to explain online cause Im not very good with writing in the middle of work lol. I had that EXACT mindset that you guys are talking about..... only to realize that I am the only one that is now still single while all my other friends are happily married. I started to think about Dating only after I turned 31.. Until then I did not really bother about getting a girlfriend at all. That attitude did not get me a girl, like how you people are saying. I was single then too. I am single now too. It is easy to laugh and ridicule a person when you already have what that person is looking for. Most likely you won't when you find yourself in that situation. Wanting a girl to hug and screw? that is so low and bizarre man... Link to comment
EQD Posted April 10, 2009 Share Posted April 10, 2009 I know there are exceptions but we are not talking about exceptions here. If I choose to quit trying and just enjoy my life then after 5 years I would have to come back to ENA and say that I am still single. And btw, why do many people think that I am only thinking about finding a girl 24*7? who told you that? every relationship that ever happened happened because it WAS an exception. nothing in life ever occurs in ideals, esp with relationships. and as for the last sentence: its all you refer to or talk about. Link to comment
EQD Posted April 10, 2009 Share Posted April 10, 2009 I had that EXACT mindset that you guys are talking about..... only to realize that I am the only one that is now still single while all my other friends are happily married. I started to think about Dating only after I turned 31.. Until then I did not really bother about getting a girlfriend at all. That attitude did not get me a girl, like how you people are saying. I was single then too. I am single now too. It is easy to laugh and ridicule a person when you already have what that person is looking for. Most likely you won't when you find yourself in that situation. Wanting a girl to hug and screw? that is so low and bizarre man... we ARENT laughing at you! if anything we are trying to help you, but you seem pretty intent on staying in the same funk you claim to hate. i had 'that' mindset 6 times easy before i ever fell into a relationship, and chances are this one will end and i'll just be forced to repeat the cycle. you arent going to find instant results, you cant Fake mindstates, and the key to life is depending on yourself, because in the end thats all you will ever have, no matter how many women love you or date you or marry you. People were born alone and usually they die alone. Link to comment
laisla Posted April 10, 2009 Share Posted April 10, 2009 I had that EXACT mindset that you guys are talking about..... only to realize that I am the only one that is now still single while all my other friends are happily married. I started to think about Dating only after I turned 31.. Until then I did not really bother about getting a girlfriend at all. That attitude did not get me a girl, like how you people are saying. I was single then too. I am single now too. It is easy to laugh and ridicule a person when you already have what that person is looking for. Most likely you won't when you find yourself in that situation. Wanting a girl to hug and screw? that is so low and bizarre man... since it's only been 2 years what's with all the negativity??? if you weren't looking in your 20s then that's that.... Link to comment
grymoire Posted April 10, 2009 Share Posted April 10, 2009 we ARENT laughing at you! if anything we are trying to help you re-read your original post and you will know why i feel that way. Link to comment
EQD Posted April 10, 2009 Share Posted April 10, 2009 re-read your original post and you will know why i feel that way. you are transferring what you think my tone is, and you are mistaken. and as long as you think i am 'laughing' or 'attacking' you then you arent going to listen to a bit of advice i am giving you. little do you know its ENA gold Link to comment
grymoire Posted April 10, 2009 Share Posted April 10, 2009 you are transferring what you think my tone is, and you are mistaken. and as long as you think i am 'laughing' or 'attacking' you then you arent going to listen to a bit of advice i am giving you. little do you know its ENA gold i didn't understand this -> little do you know its ENA gold. you can take it whichever way you want but if someone suggests that i am looking for a girl to hug and screw i am going to be offended by it. so your SO is keeping you only for screwing purposes? Link to comment
Ac143 Posted April 10, 2009 Share Posted April 10, 2009 i didn't understand this -> little do you know its ENA gold. you can take it whichever way you want but if someone suggests that i am looking for a girl to hug and screw i am going to be offended by it. so your SO is keeping you only for screwing purposes? I know you didn't ask me....but yup he might be ...I am pretty darn good at it hahaha :shocked!: so yea as far as the thread goes....personality always wins in my books Link to comment
EQD Posted April 10, 2009 Share Posted April 10, 2009 i didn't understand this -> little do you know its ENA gold. you can take it whichever way you want but if someone suggests that i am looking for a girl to hug and screw i am going to be offended by it. so your SO is keeping you only for screwing purposes? no! lord no!.... its the other way around. lol just kidding. hug n screw. it was a joke. but basically it covers the bases of a relationship. you have sex, you have children, you hug them, which is a standard form of bonding. so by 'hug and screw' it actually referred to the entire spectrum of what a relationship is. now look at this: ENA gold means its valuable advice. Link to comment
grymoire Posted April 10, 2009 Share Posted April 10, 2009 I know you didn't ask me....but yup he might be ...I am pretty darn good at it hahaha such a classy woman you are Ac143 Link to comment
EQD Posted April 10, 2009 Share Posted April 10, 2009 listen to tyler. *points at tyler* now that you have me in your trasferred imaginary 'bad cop' tone his advice should be in comparison much more user friendly. Link to comment
Ac143 Posted April 10, 2009 Share Posted April 10, 2009 such a classy woman you are Ac143 Ha aren't I? I am around WAY too many men all day, everyday. And yes Tyler makes a lot of sense! Link to comment
NowandZen Posted April 10, 2009 Share Posted April 10, 2009 Hey Grym: While it's true that a lot of women do not ask men out *directly*, they are not all shy, IME, in letting it be known that they are interested. Just more subtle perhaps. Are you open to the signals? Link to comment
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