THE NO CONTACT CHALLENGE, Part 2

[mojopin11]

End of Day 5 NC (1 month + since breakup). Feeling quite melancholy. Quite hard to move on and get on with my life when we both believe there is a possibility of reunion in the future. We also both agreed to act as if there wasn't, otherwise we wouldn't move on. Finding it hard to really try and move on and get over him because I do have that hope, even though I agreed I would pretend it wasn't there.

[mojopin11]

To the lady a couple of posts above me - I got my sister to change my password and deactivate my FB for a few months. I could see myself spending hours stalking his profile and analysing every interaction he has... maybe you could think about doing the same? Oh and I can guarantee he did read them!

[Sparkleeyes]

DAY 14

 

Can't believe it is only 2 weeks. It feels like months. The last 24 hours have been a rollercoaster of emotions. Went to bed feeling as bad as the day of the break-up, but woke up with a fresh mind. The worst is wondering how he is spending his time without me. My imagination is running wild and I hate it. Trying my hardest to occupy my mind with other things. NC is definitely the best way to go, because at least then I avoid the possibility of rejection or hurt.

[GrowingUp85]

Day 46 of NC. Day 161 since BU.

 

I still want to contact you. Why did you give me false hope and then ignore me? Was it to ease your own guilt about breaking up with me? That sounds like you. So selfish, never caring about how your actions impact anyone else.

[Limiya]

Day 6 of NC, -

Although we've broken up for about 3 weeks now, i'm still missing you.

I know it's for the best. But i just can't help wonder what you are doing, where you are, who you're with etc.

I know you're not thinking the same about me. You know i'm at work right now, you know my schedule.

I wonder if you miss me sometimes. I hope so. We were together a long time.

I just wish you could have handled things differently.

 

Today i actually feel ok. I'm not is as much pain as i have been the past few days.

I refuse to look at photo's, dwell on memories or anything remotely similar.

Just keeping with friends and family. Things to occupy my mind.

When will i stop thinking about him??? ARGH! i hate it.

It's hardly been a week since i decided NC. I hate this.

[Chinafish]

Just checkin' in on this thread.

 

All you guys are doing amazingly well. I'm so jealous. Why can't I do NC? I swear he's like an addiction, something I know is poisonous, yet I've no will power to stop it.

 

Every single time I've asked him to stop contacting me I end up contacting him!!! Very rarely, granted, but I'm my own worst enemy. I don't understand what he gets from all this messaging. Is it just an ego thing? He has a gf, so why isn't he texting her from the train or the car or the kitchen or wherever he is when he's bored.

 

How can you dump someone, replace them and still think its okay to text up to 100 times a day?

 

Grrrrr. And yes, I know, if I didn't reply we wouldn't get into these mega texting sessions. I think that's what I wanted to say to you all. Well done and total respect to all who stick to NC. I really believe its the only way - I just can't do it.

 

Why would I rather keep

Myself in this friend zone hell than draw a line and go bold turkey? When will This wretched hope go away? When will I be able to read a message from him and not respond? What does he get from it? I can't just be 'his friend' how many people text there 'friends' hundreds of times a week?

 

So full of anguish this week. Had tears as well.

 

Sorry to ramble on....

[myolie]

Day 1

Want to call him, but stop myself.

[myolie]

Day 2 of NC

Miss the weekends you used to hangout

[Sparkleeyes]

Day 15

 

Missing you like crazy. Please come back to me.

[Limiya]

ChinaFish -

I feel for you, i really do.

YOU CAN do it though. It just hurts that's all. And it hurts a LOT!

 

All i think about every minute of every day is to text him or call him.

That's all i want to do. Hear his voice or hold his hand. Anything. Just to kiss him would be heaven right now.

 

But i won't contact him. He isn't going to contact me either. PLUS i know he hates it when he is chased. So it won't do me any good.

He knows how upset i was when we broke up (still am) and he is keeping away from me so i can try and heal.

It will do me no good to try and keep texting or calling.

And if he IS with another woman (as i suspect), the last thing i want is to respond to him constantly whilst he gets his kicks with her, and i'm just a 'friend'.

I'd feel worse.

 

Give it a try.

 

-------------

 

Day 7 of NC.

I still miss you. But i'm still alive, and i'm still me.

[needygf]

Day 19 NC.

 

Sigh, had a dream about you last night. We're still together and hang out at the mall. I wanna take the stairs to my apartment and you wanna take the lift. I then have a feeling that I won't see you again, I panic and rush to the lift lobby. You're gone. Somehow I wanna search the whole mall but it seems desperate, and I know you don't like desperate. Then I wanna wait at the subway entrance. But in the end I give up (and suddenly it turns into a zombie invasion dream and I fight bravely). Isn't it just the reflection of us now?

 

My brain let you go in my dream. I hope my heart can keep it this way when I wake up.

[whiteoleanders]

BACK TO DAY 1

 

I hadn't contacted him for 2 weeks after our BU, and last night coming back from a party I decided to get my stuff from his apartment. I got out of the elevator and he was there. He asked me "what the **** was I doing there" and I pretended that his roommate which i am still friends with said it was okay for me to get my stuff. So I said it was fine and would get it some other time and left. Found out that he has new gf just short of breaking up with me because he didn't want a girlfriend anymore. Back at square one and it sucks.

[Sparkleeyes]

DAY 16

 

Having a good day today. Went out with friends for dinner last night and had a lovely time. I enjoyed getting dressed up and played some upbeat music to get me in the mood. knew I wouldn't bump into him because he is travelling at the moment. Was chatted up briefly by a lovely man which gave me a confidence boost.

 

Feeling positive.

[myolie]

Day three of NC

Stop myself from calling you

[NjoyStick]

Hey bro's and female bro's!

 

Alot of you are still wandering around in the energy of the ex, it's normal to do that but we should focus on what we need to do, and that's healing.

 

The biggest killer that's holding you back from healing is a little thing called hope.

As long as you have just the slightest hope of your ex returning you can't and won't heal.

 

The only way to heal is to kill the hope you are carrying with you.

What's the use in hoping?

It will only make you feel worse as long as it won't happen, and believe me... As hard as it is... It won't happen.

 

Let me tell you a story about my grandpa's sister.

She lost her husband due to cancer, she knew he was gone and he wouldn't come back... She never got over it, she never gave herself the chance to get over the fact she lost her husband forever...

What happened after her loss was terrible... She started drinking heavy, stopped taking care of herself and it went downhill from there...

She locked herself in her house and didn't even take a moment to go to the bathroom... They found her in her bed, dead and laying around in her own **** and piss...

She died of a broken heart...

This is what happens in the worst case if you can't get over someone...

She never lost hope for her husband but lost hope in life...

 

Hope is what is holding you back, hope keeps telling you he or she will change his or her mind and will come back to you... The truth is, they made up their mind and we disagree with it.

It's a hard pill to swallow but we all have to do it... It's one of many lessons of life, please... Don't end up like my mom's aunt, don't end up misserable and still heart broken...

 

Some people are not worth your tears and sorrow...

They need to learn from what they choose to do with their lives, you can't help them with that.

Leave your ex be, as long as you are sad and depressed you can't do anything, not for them but certainly not for yourself.

 

Kill the hope you still have for them, they don't belong in your life anymore.

You know it and they know it.

 

Somewhere out there is a person that's perfect for you in more ways then your ex will ever be...

Maybe you should build up a new hope that has nothing to do with the past but only holds the love and succes for your future.

 

Don't forgetthat you are an amazing person capable of giving so much love and care, the ex never saw that an maybe they will see it in the future but you can deal with that crap once it comes and once it comes you are healed, over it and have a new love in your life...

 

It's never good to live in the past to long, as for the future... It could be anything you want it to be.

[Sparkleeyes]

DAY 17

 

I've had too much spare time today. Too much time to think about how I would like to have him here beside me again, like the good old days.

 

He returns from his travels tonight. He's had 5 days on a deserted beach followed by a 6 hour flight. I hope he took some time to think about me and to think about us.

[Limiya]

I'm proud of myself going NC for 9 days. I've never done that before.

At the beginning i was hoping he'd contact me, however i know he won't now. And i'm happier that he won't.

I wouldn't be able to take the turmoil that will put my emotions in.

 

It's very difficult, but so far so good.

 

Limiya

[myolie]

Day 4 of NC

Another day of missing you

[myolie]

Still day 4

I know he will never contact me, but I cant forget him. Missing him like crazy.

[jeepman41]

Still day 4

I know he will never contact me, but I cant forget him. Missing him like crazy.

 

It's a hopeless feeling to want somebody you can't be with. But stay strong in side and keep pushing on. It will get a little better each day.

[Lightning87]

Was on day 38...doing so well. Then got drunk last night and gave his mobile a one ringer at 4am. FML.

[Sparkleeyes]

DAY 18

 

Woke up this morning with the biggest ache in my heart. He's back from his travels now and I hoped to receive a message saying he couldn't stop thinking about me, but alas it didn't happen. I don't have any urge to make contact with him, so feeling strong in that respect.

[Sparkleeyes]

DAY 19

 

Thinking about him obsessively, but no tears, only sadness. NC is defintely the best way to go. I am liking the freedom of not waiting on messages and analyzing his replies for hidden meanings. I'm beginning to heal but not quite moving on.

[Limiya]

Day 11 of NC.

This is the longest i've gone NC with him in 6 years.

 

Some days i find it the hardest thing to do in the world. And other days i find myself impressed as to how much easier it is than i thought.

The fact i have friends and family not allowing me to feel sorry for myself too much is such a bonus.

This week WILL be one of the hardest weeks to get through. And i KNOW i will have my weak times where i'll be crying my eyes out and shouting 'why me?', but when i think of things more logically (instead of with my heart) then i know it's for the best and the relationship wasn't going to go anywhere.

 

I'll keep posted however.

Limiya

[NjoyStick]

It's been like 100 days since NC started and something happened... Something i thought would never happen... My ex, miss "i'm happy with my new bf and i don't need you" texted me today... After about 100 days she suddenly contacts me...

Last month was her bday and i put a deposit of a penny on her bank account with the discription: a penny for your thoughts...

And today she texted me saying that she saw the deposit with the message a while ago and now she wants to know how i'm doing...

And i've send her a message back telling her i'm doing awesome and my life is going great!

I didn't ask her how she was doing cause i don't want to know...

I have no idea why she wants to contact me all of a sudden...

Ah well, i'll see where this is going.

I think after 100 days of NC that it's ok to have it broken, i'm not sad anymore!

And the hope is long gone so i don't really care =D