THE NO CONTACT CHALLENGE, Part 2

[Lightning87]

Day 20...the longest we have ever not been in touch. Feeling better today, mainly because I went on a date last night that was really good. Sure I will go back to missing you once the novelty of the date wears off...

[GrowingUp85]

Day 31. Just shy of 5 months since BU. She hasn't initiated contact since the BU. In fact, we've had 1, maybe 2 real conversations since then.

 

The NC Challenge is completed. I feel better having completed something, but still think about her all the time. I wish I would have done this from the beginning because I fear that my chasing in the beginning ended all hope of us ever being together.

 

I had another girl ask me to try to LDR with her. I tried explaining that I didn't think I was ready because of the ex and that I wasn't over her. She didn't seem to mind. I think I need to have a heavier discussion with her and give her all the facts, why I think I'm not over her, etc. It may be worth a shot.

[PaperSt1537]

Day 1

 

Two-and-a-half years together, including living together for 16 months, and a two-week "break" later, my girlfriend made it clear last night that it was over. Love is still there on both sides but I guess we're just not compatable and she doesn't believe we're meant to be together. It was a long time coming but I deluded myself into thinking I could salvage it. We spent the whole day yesterday crying and talking, mostly me pleading for one more chance and her shooting me down in various ways.

 

So I want to to do this. I want to stop contact because I do think it's possibly the most important thing about moving on but it's also always been the hardest part. The problem is, we're on the same phone plan for another two years and I don't want to block her from Facebook because of the kind of reaction that would result in doing so.

 

As much as I want to do this to move on, I also want her to miss me. It's pretty ridiculous but I just want her to remember our good times together and not these stupid attempts to coerce my way back into her life. I'm just not sure how to do that when I don't want to start blocking her because I just think that really makes me look weak. And I've really been weak for a while now.

[GrowingUp85]

Paper, I'm sorry your going through this, but it's wise of you to start NC immediately. I also think it's a good idea that you block Facebook, regardless of the reaction that you get. You don't want to be looking at pictures of her and thinking about what could have been. I wish I would have done it a long time ago, myself.

[GrowingUp85]

Day 31. Just shy of 5 months since BU. She hasn't initiated contact since the BU. In fact, we've had 1, maybe 2 real conversations since then.

 

The NC Challenge is completed. I feel better having completed something, but still think about her all the time. I wish I would have done this from the beginning because I fear that my chasing in the beginning ended all hope of us ever being together.

 

I had another girl ask me to try to LDR with her. I tried explaining that I didn't think I was ready because of the ex and that I wasn't over her. She didn't seem to mind. I think I need to have a heavier discussion with her and give her all the facts, why I think I'm not over her, etc. It may be worth a shot.

 

To this, I wanted to add that I wish there were a way for me to apologize for not respecting her wishes and continuing to contact her, even though she was ignoring me, after the breakup. I'd also like to explain how much I learned about myself and relationships in general. But I can't do that without contacting her. Oh well.

It was just such a weird way to end a relationship, and it feels like there's still loose ends.

[hotnspicychikn]

5 days. The longest I have ever gone without talking to you since we met.

[lovelove319]

3 weeks now of NC (also the longest we've ever gone not talking)... I never begged, pleaded or did anything to try and change his mind. I tried holding my head up high and told him I will respect his decision. He knew at the time it's not what I wanted, but I'm not going to beg someone to stay with me if that's not what they want. At this moment, I'm going through anger. I'm angry from him abandoning me the way he did, only 3 days after telling me he wanted to marry me and have children with me. I deserve better and he will someday realize what he lost.

[crazyoflove]

Day 25

 

I miss her. I kinda secretly hoped that she will contact me. There are moments when I feel a huge burden mounting inside of me but there is no one I can talk about it.

[Chinafish]

Day 6 umpteenth attempt.

 

Really weird, he hasn't contacted me at all since Friday. Maybe he's finally cutting the cord and letting me go. Don't know how I feel about that.

 

For 5 months all I've wanted is for him to come back to me. Now I can honestly say if I had one wish it would be to be over him. So there's a definite shift in my feelings. Still bloody hurts but a bit less. I only think about him every 5 minutes instead of every minute.

 

Had a fling with a rather nice young man last weekend whilst away with the girls ;-) naughty but did the ego the world of good (13 years younger than me woohoo)

[xmen777]

It's been 2 weeks and a half now of NC. I keep wishing inside that she would contact me but nothing.

Went on a trip and of my friends keeps talking about her. She liked her as a friend as they had similar problems.

It was a bit bothersome to keep hearing about her. I didn't mind that much, but still.

 

Trying some online dating. I think I might have found a date or two.

[Taji]

Day 9

I have been NC 9 days and I am up for the challenge. I will post my progress here. I am letting go and I will do NC to heal and move forward. I have requested him not to contact me if it's for anything else other than working things out.

[Lightning87]

Day 21 - it is getting easier. Still wonder what he is up to though or why he hasn't been in touch. Oh well, need to move on!

[NjoyStick]

Well... I guess i'm at about 3 months right now of NC!

 

Started school again yesterday and i got 17 people in my class, me, 2 dudes i now already hang out with and 14 girls haha xD

These next few years of school are going to be awesome!

I'm the oldest of the class with 24 and the youngest is 16 and the rest is between that ofcourse =P

 

I hope that i can say that i'm a male nurse in about 4 years!

Already got lot's of experence cause i was a medic in the Dutch army for about 5 years!

 

Life is getting alot better, i don't think about my ex anymore, it's time to move on and accept things the way they are.

 

It's never good to live in the past too long!

[leftme]

Day 19

 

It's not so much her crossing my mind anymore but the actual relationship. I see its flaws and I see where changes are needed in me. I don't plan on trying to win her back. I still look at sites about reconciliation but more out of boredom than desperation.

 

Going to my friends after work today. That should keep my mind occupied and I can verbally bash her down to him for further progress.

[Nolia]

Can anyone help me? Need advice. Thanks

[Chinafish]

Day 6 umpteenth attempt.

 

Really weird, he hasn't contacted me at all since Friday. Maybe he's finally cutting the cord and letting me go. Don't know how I feel about that.

 

For 5 months all I've wanted is for him to come back to me. Now I can honestly say if I had one wish it would be to be over him. So there's a definite shift in my feelings. Still bloody hurts but a bit less. I only think about him every 5 minutes instead of every minute.

 

Had a fling with a rather nice young man last weekend whilst away with the girls ;-) naughty but did the ego the world of good (13 years younger than me woohoo)

God, was that only this morning? What a difference a day makes....been in his arms today ( only friendly hugging, could have been more if I'd let it) anyway, he's going to call me in 10 minutes AAARRGGHHHH

[yazc89]

Day 6

 

Thought about him all day today been on a bit of a downer.. not good for my new job! Maybe its cuz i didnt get a lot of sleep last night. Definetly dont think theres any hope any more... his mum n sis have said they are sorry n hope to keep in touch as they loved having me in the family so he has obviously told them this is it. Feel like crying but trying not to

[xmen777]

I saw her tonight, she came back so I would see her. Noticed that she still has a badge I gave her. She stuck it on her handbag actually. If anyone sees this who's a fan of a certain tv programme, they will tell her I'm sure.. She's leaving the country next week I wished her a good trip etc, nothing much but we were civil.

[peace392]

I am doing this challenge!

BU 9 days ago, contacted today. Got nothing back.

So I am ready to stay dedicated..so today is DAY 1!

i'm terrified at how it will go, but this thread is giving me motivation

[Redtide]

Today is day one of NC for me. I feel extremely depressed and confused about why he is doing what he is doing, but I will stick to this challenge with all of my being.

[crazyoflove]

Day 26

 

Still no word from her. Guess she really moved on. I noticed though that she now changes her online statuses almost daily posting things that may be related to us. She usually changes these statuses once a year. However, there has been no attempt to contact me since I ignored her message two weeks ago. It hurts and I miss her even though everything in my life is going in positive direction. I know that I will not contact her but I'd give everything to see her name on display.

[Chinafish]

Oh crazy, your doing so well. I know what you mean about wanting their name to pop up on your screen/cell. Stick with it buddy x

[adyghost]

Day 5

 

I started on Monday and I'm back home, which is about 8000 miles away from her that should help quite a bit. There will be an occasional e-mail from her asking about my health situation; I'm dealing with the possibility of cancer but it doesn't seem to be that serious so far. I will respond with a polite update; that's it as far as contact goes.

 

I also made a "personal growth" plan of sorts. I started a health diet and exercise plan, doing yoga, volunteering, practicing my instrument, and reconnecting with old friends. All in all a pretty exciting time for me... brought down by the occasional thought of not being able to hold her again...

 

Wish me luck!

[xmen777]

And I emailed her so my count resets again. But it was to send her a video I had told her about yesterday.

[peace392]

Day 2

Feeling low this morning. Woke ul with a pit in my stomach. I always wonder if he feels this way. Im sick of being let down and rejected, we all deserve better.