"Call Me Every Day" & "Answer Phone/ Return Calls Immediately"

[c579j]

I haven't read through the thread entirely. It's strange how we have such high communication expectations from SO's and very few other relationships. Most people are probably comfortable without talking to even with good friends (whom you choose) or parents on a daily basis. But when the guy doesn't call, we females get all worked up and obsessive about it and count the minutes.

 

I've mostly have bad experiences with guys not calling. Why do guys never seem to like to call (even my brothers hate the phone)? Or does it just depend on the guy?

 

A female friends says that you know you're in a good relationship when the guy calls "just because he's thinking of you"? Another female friend said that guys need to "be trained" to call. They don't intuitively pick up the phone.

 

I really wish I could get a single male's perspective about phone communication.

[Lauren8785]

sorry it says this msg is too short so i have to add characters

[JadedStar]

J

 

Just for the record, i do not get obsessive or irate if i don't get a phone call within a certain timeframe, nor do i count down the minutes. As stated, many people here don't demand this occur, they are in relationships where the man they are with is jsut as keen on talking to her daily as she is him.

[atelis]

A female friends says that you know you're in a good relationship when the guy calls "just because he's thinking of you"? .

 

really?.......what if he calls 5 times a day to tell you he thinks of you. would your friend still think she was in a good relationship?

[SpeedingCars]

Hmm... but what if you honestly just don't feel like talking to them? I feel like my relationship isn't as 'strong' as most people's then, because sometimes my guy and I will go a day without talking. Nothing particularly happened, it's just we have our own thing going on.

 

I've seen couples who talk everyday who are just as bad as the next couple who rarely talk to each other. So I guess maybe it's not an indicator of how good your relationship is.

 

And I rarely call my family. It doesn't mean I do not care for them... I really just don't feel like talking to them unless I need to. I have major mood swings, so it's nothing personal against them.

[JadedStar]

Hmm... but what if you honestly just don't feel like talking to them? I feel like my relationship isn't as 'strong' as most people's then, because sometimes my guy and I will go a day without talking. Nothing particularly happened, it's just we have our own thing going on.

 

I've seen couples who talk everyday who are just as bad as the next couple who rarely talk to each other. So I guess maybe it's not an indicator of how good your relationship is.

 

And I rarely call my family. It doesn't mean I do not care for them... I really just don't feel like talking to them unless I need to. I have major mood swings, so it's nothing personal against them.

 

I guess every couple has to set their own rules, because for me I know i have never gone a day where i thought 'ya know, i just don't feel like talking to him today'.

 

But no, it is not the only indicator to show whether or not a couple is happy. But it is an indicator to show who ISN"T happy if one wants more communication than the other is willing to give.

[deaxtime2]

Wow!! I was going to post a thread about this today.

 

I was at the movie theater getting to watch a movie, I noticed all these people txt'ing, calling etc. Even 10 years ago were not this over communicated. Meet you at the movie at 8 okay see you at 8, done. no txt'ing how far are you guys etc.

 

I think that this new age of constant, instant communication is amazing. It also has a dark side it has lead to an increase level of hyper sensitivity in relationships.

[JeckyllNHyde]

Why?

 

A. I need to hear the details of my SO's day so I know that s/he isn't doing something s/he shouldn't (i.e. cheating).

 

B. I need the reassurance that s/he still loves me and cares about me.

 

C. I feel too lonely when I don't hear from him/her.

 

D. All of the above/ Other

 

I'd have to pick B, C, D.

To me a phone call says he is thinking about me (a.k.a. cares).

I also feel a bit lonely when I don't hear from him. He's my best friend and I've grown accustomed since (a bit before) we where dating, that we would at least text each other hello everyday.

And I like hearing about how his day has been going. Nothing to do with needing to know he's not cheating. However, from my past experiences, most guys who didn't call everyday when we where dating WHERE cheating. (Just saying.. it doesn't mean every guy who doesn't call is cheating)

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Second question: I can't really relate at the moment. My bf picks up the phone pretty much everytime I call and vice versa. On occasion when he doesn't I'll kid around and say "you didn't pick up

But nothing too serious or accusing.

 

I like it if my bf calls me back since it shows me things aren't one sided and he wants to talk to me as much as I want to talk to him/has the same amount of interest. I expect the same treatment I give basically.

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Last question. What level of communication do you expect in each stage of a relationship? You can define each stage as you'd like.

I expect more and better communication as time goes on. In the beginning there can be miscommunication and different styles. We're not mind readers but we ARE individuals.. with different characters,