Emotions

[Gracelove]

I'm having a difficult time managing my emotions lately. I've started exercising, but that doesn't seem to help enough.

 

Does anyone have any advice? Have you found a fool-proof way to get your emotions under control? A way to keep your emotions from ruling or controlling your behavior?

 

I've tried journaling, self-reflection, I've tried figuring out what "is really wrong"...but it's not working for me right now.

 

Are there any other tricks?

 

Thanks in advance.

 

~Grace

[CAgirl]

Lately when I've been upset, I just let myself recognize why I am upset. Like I literally will say in my mind "Why am I upset?" and allow myself to answer the question. It is better to allow yourself to feel your emotions rather than letting them build up until you can't stand it anymore. There is nothing wrong with crying every once in a while! Just try to recognize what emotion you are feeling and why. It has helped me a lot.

[DropToZero]

Learn to not care... that's what I did... just don't take it too far... ehhh

[Keyman]

It sounds like you are like me, the emotions take over and won't let go. My mind slips to something and my emotions think it's a great thing to jump on board. Usually it's a negative thing, like the recent break up, or not knowing what she wants.

 

I use lots of tricks to help all that I can.

1) journaling is good. But write about going forward, not about what has been. We can tend to focus on the negative or what has been going on, we should focus on the future and good things we are going to achieve.

 

2) Positive Affirmate. Get a postit notepad. Write an affirmation on it every morning and take it with you. Sit it on your monitor at work, on the fridge at home or in your pocket. Somewhere you will notice it. and everytime you look at it, smile and repeat it.

 

3) Box up what is causing the emotions. visualise putting the thoughts into a box and seal it, then put that in a box and seal it too, then carry it to the post office and post it to lithuania. Every time you have a bad thought do that.

 

4) get a focus. Fill up your time with something else. For me it's writing, so I go out and write, I think about writing when I'm not doing it

 

5) if you are religious or not, pray for happy thoughts when you go to sleep

 

6) read positivy articles. I go to link removed and read the positivity threads. Read a different one every day.

 

There are others that I just can't remember right at the moment, but try those ones...

[top bloke]

Imagine our emotions are like a rocky boat sometimes.. We know there are better waters coming but now its rocky...so the trick is to keep your wits about you as the storm of seeming catastrophe falls around you. Have courage and it wont be long before this storm goes and the sun will shine again... Keep your wits about you and dont lose your head..god bless

[Gracelove]

Thanks guys!!!!

 

Everything you said is so encouraging. I'm going to stay optimistic, and not freak out so much.

 

I'll try daily affirmations. I'll read more positive stories.

 

Sometimes I feel really worried, I don't know whether I'm up or down.

 

I reallly don't want to disappoint my parents.

 

Anywho, I'll just stay positive, and try to find a way to resolve any past issues.

 

However, it seems like there are too many past issues. And I get tired of thinking of them.

I don't know how to resolve them.

 

I try as much as possible. Sometimes I feel I make a little headway, but not always.

 

Also, I feel so far behind my peers.

 

I've seen a few girls form highschool, at my job, and it makes me feel bad.

 

They are younger than me, and they are getting married, or they are married. I just assume they have a wonderful job. Some have a home.

 

I'm in school, but it's really not easy for me. When I was in school before, I didn't have to work.

I either leaved on campus, or pretty close by, so I was around my peers.

 

Now I have to call my friends, or find time to see them, that is challenging in itself.

 

And I'm excerising every day, which is exhausting.

 

Something else that is...hard I guess, is dealing with my mother sometimes.

 

My mother is an over-achiever. She works like a horse, she seems unstoppable.

 

She tells me what I should do, expects me to do certain things, and I don't feel that I can, always.

 

And I don't want to say, "It's hard for me". Because then she'll be like, "What's hard?"

 

And I'm not trying to limit myself. I think I can actually do a lot. But I have a lot of insecurities, way more than she does. And I have to reassure myself, when it comes to certain things.

 

And then she looks at me like I'm a failure, or weak. And I wish it weren't that way, but she can't help it.

 

She urged me to start school earlier than I wanted to, but I'm glad she did.

 

But I don't know if I can do the rest.

 

It's hard, when you feel someone is looking down on you. I try really hard to make things okay.

 

I just don't feel like I'm getting encouragement from anywhere right now.

 

And I know what my mother would say, "You have to encourage yourself". But that isn't always easy. And she would say, "Nothing is easy".

 

I just want to keep the depression under control, and move forward.

 

I feel so disappointed in myself, you know. Because I know other people face hardships and they excel. And my mother really admires those people.

 

But after so much hardship, I crumbled. And I'm not as resilient as I'd like to be.

 

But I'm trying, it just, flat out, doesn't seem to be good enough.

[Jeremiah Johnson]

I understand exactly what you're saying. It's a tough battle to come out from under the yoke of parental expectations. I can't give you much advice here unfortunately. I wish I could.

[skarlet]

I don't think you should be disappointed in yourself. You are doing an awesome job dealing with your emotions and depression. It's not just about going through hardship - depression goes deeper than that.

 

I don't look down on you, and I know that mother means well in her perspective, but she's flatly not like, empathizing with you. Of course you are weak, everyone is. You are NOT a failure, however. You are still hanging in there trying your hardest. That means you ARE excelling through hardship. Depression IS hardship, but it's a sneaky kind of hardship that attacks you on the inside. I'm guessing that your Mom never had to battle that kind of hardship? Or she would not look at you as weak.

 

Like, I don't consider myself weak. I've never been a moody person. I am one of the most resilient people I know. I've been through lots of hardship, and excelled. Usually, I'm everyone's therapist. Me and my family go through a disaster, and I'm the person who holds it all together. But see, now, I've faced something traumatic that I don't know how to deal with exactly, and I am sinking into depression, and wanting to hurt myself and stuff.

 

You can be strong, and resilient, and awesome, and still struggle with this! I know that you are going to make it through. But you do need some understanding people. I know how crushing it is for other people to look down on you because of it. Really. You need some support, because I don't think you're going to get understanding from your mom.

 

(unless of course you see a therapist, and take your mom with you for a session. That could really open her eyes)

[GoneCrazy]

I've been having a hell of time with mine. Sunday i woke up fresh and ready for the day. Later that night things changed and i've been feeling like crap ever since.

 

I find that talking about it on here really does help.

[top bloke]

I think it a good start to realise bad and good are part of life. I know that ..you know that. Why is it that we get really upset with the bad? Why dont we free ourselves from fear and anger by killing those detrimenral emotions on the spot so we can see the moment for what it is free of these emotional obstructions to reality?

I cant say worry never grips me..but when it does i hold my emotions still because if i dont then im not in control anymore