blair1684 Posted January 28, 2009 Share Posted January 28, 2009 Ugh I dont know if anyone read my previous post, but I really thought things were on the way of me and my ex bf getting bavk together. At first it took awhile but then he came around. Last week we went out for dinner and it was great we had so much fun, he kept saying things like o next time we'll go here n next time we'll do this-making it seem like he wanted to be together again. He asked me what I was doing that weekend n what do u know he showed up at the same bar that I was at. I know its bad but we ended up kissing. That night he texted me that the only reason he went there was to see me and kissing me is what it should feel like. Basically giving me all these false hopes. We've been talking everynight since that. Heres where it gets bad we talked last night and he made me feel like I was this desperate person trying to get him back when I never even once brought up that topic. He told me he wanted me as a friend, and that he cant be in a relationship right now bc he needs to figure himself out . He said he could see himself with me but just not right now it wouldnt work. He's also said that he doesnt want to date anyone but if I feel the need to go out and be with guys then I need to do that he doesnt want to hold me back from anything. He said he thinks about getting back together with me all the time but he fights those feelings bc right now its not right for him. HE said he's always been in relationships and he wants to be alone for like 5 months. I told him if u want to be friends thats fine but dont kiss me then and dont text me cute things like when we were dating. I just dont get him. What does he think Im just gonna be sitting around waiting for him until he finally decides he's ready?--Should I cut him off or remain friends and take his calls and still hangout with him? I need advice please I just really dont know what to do- Any guys out there that can give me their honest opinions on the situation would be great. Also im 24 and hes 26 and after we broke up we had no choice but to move back in to our parents houses so basically we're both sleeping on our moms couches and wouldnt even have a place to hangout. He's saving to buy a house in August, and said he's just focused on doing that right now and if I still talk to him by then then maybe we can see where it goes Link to comment
1MoreChance Posted January 28, 2009 Share Posted January 28, 2009 Go on with your life without him as he is playing mind games and isn,t ready to be with you (but the mind games are meant to keep you under his control). This all may be pretty inconscious on his part but YOU see all the mixed messages andit is causing you doubt and iner turmoil. I have been going thru similar thing in the last several months and I hung on and hoped and now he has been seeing someone else for like 9 days. Yet 2 days ago on the phone he told me how confused he felt and how this new chick never has time to see hi because "people her age are like that, just want to see each other once in a blue moon"... ya whatever. He needs to experience his little rejection thing with a 15 y o girl. Obviously he wants to forget me. I suggest we do the same to the ones who have no time or energy for the reationship, but want to keep us safely by their side just in case. If he wants friendship and still has feelings for you, but you are unable to give him that right now, trust that he will come back when he is reayd and when you are ready and if it is only friendship you will both be ok with that. If he is not ok with you stepping back, a relationship of any sort isn't meant to continue or happen in the future. It takes two to nurture this unhealthy type of relationship. Link to comment
huskiesfan Posted January 28, 2009 Share Posted January 28, 2009 Right now---Cut him off. The guy is playing games with you and is trying to keep you around as the plan-b girl. He's doing enough to keep you hooked and interested, but not enough to signify he's ready to get back together with you. You don't deserve to go through that, so let him know that you aren't a plaything who can be tossed aside, then picked back up. Link to comment
Crazyaboutdogs Posted January 28, 2009 Share Posted January 28, 2009 and said he's just focused on doing that right now and if I still talk to him by then then maybe we can see where it goes Well, he's got nerve! I would tell him thanks but no thanks and walk out of his life. Link to comment
blair1684 Posted January 28, 2009 Author Share Posted January 28, 2009 i know hes such a jerk i just dont get after we broke up we still talked then finally we stopped talking all together like 4 months ago-why if he didnt want anything with me did he even come back into contact with me then why did he just stay out of my life Link to comment
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