Unusual U Posted June 28, 2009 Author Share Posted June 28, 2009 Thanks guys!!! I was getting so frustrated and it was totally ridiculous, so I decided it was time to just stop. I'm way happier this way! Again, thank you guys for helping me out with this (whatever "this" happens to be)! Link to comment
Unusual U Posted July 1, 2009 Author Share Posted July 1, 2009 Okay, so B is still kind-of avioding me, so I decided I'd sort-of confront him. So, I had just gotten a MySpace maybe a week ago, and I sent him a friend request. I added a messege to it, and this is what it said: "Look, I'm tired of you acting awkward around me, all I want to do is talk, add me and we can settle this. It's really getting on my nerves." I sent that, like, 3min. ago. . . . Link to comment
Unusual U Posted July 10, 2009 Author Share Posted July 10, 2009 So, he added me. I then sent him a messege called "Our Talk" confronting him about how I am getting very aggrivated that he's been avioding me and acting strange around me, ignoring my IM's and me in general. He then told me that he hasn't been avioding me, but hasn't been on AIM in a while. I told him that I did not believe him, seeing as I've been on AIM the same time he was on, waiting for a reply on an IM I sent him, and he wouldn't reply, or he'd just ignore me. He then appologized for avioding me, stating that he just needs sometime to get used to the fact that I'm gay. I understood that. . . . Not too long after, maybe a day or two, I was on AIM and my friend Andrew and I were talking. ~*~*~*WAIT*~*~*~!!! Background info: I know that Andrew is against gay marriage and speaks poorly of the homosexual population and I've been bothered by that at certain periods in time. !!!ANYWAY!!!: Well, he asked me if I was gay or bi, because he had heard some rumous and wanted to know if it was true or not. I then asked who he heard them from. He replied, "I don't remember." I then said, "You don't remember, or you don't want to tell me?" he then told me because he knew I was right. B and my friend Jake had told him. Apparently, it was about a month ago. I asked how I could possibly trust him {due to the statements above}. He told me it was all talk and that he doesn't really mean anything by it. Andrew and I have known eachother for a long time and I felt pretty comfortable with him, and he promised that he wouldn't ever tell anyone anything, so I told him it was true. He was fine with it. And we've been talking through the night and recently went on a walk that took over 6hrs. But that's beside the point. A day later Jake was on AIM and I asked him why he told Andrew I was gay, and he said B was the one who cracked first. I didn't really understand, so he told me that B told Andrew that I asked him out, and then Andrew asked Jake if it was true, and Jake didn't really have any choice but to tell him. I've IM'ed B on AIM about it, this is what I had said: Hey, I have a question for you. Why can't you keep your mouth shut? Why did you lie when you said I could trust you? I don't understand. What made you have the impulse that you just had to tell Andrew how I felt about you? Why? Don't give me some dumb-ass answer either, I want to know EXACTLY WHY YOU FELT THE NEED TO JUST GO ANDREW ABOUT THAT! YOU NEED TO SHUT YOUR MOUTH AND KEEP SECRETS A SECRET!!! WHY WOULD YOU TELL SOMEONE!?!? WHY?!?!?!?! I talked to him on MySpace and told him to check his AIM, but he hasn't because apparently it's not working or something. . . . Link to comment
blueblueblue Posted July 10, 2009 Share Posted July 10, 2009 First of all, dont listen to the above because ive noticed posts from that guy usually consist of negative one liners - the post above would completely make someone feel crushed and hurt about their own friends "find friends you can trust" - he's probably just unsuccesful with his own lovelife - anyway... at one point you had so much control and restraint with the situation, keep some integrity by drawing from the strength you had during those times - i understand how painstaking and tiring this whole rollercoaster has been, ive had a similar scenario and i respect that you told him and now you have the closure which is a million times better than a "what if" personally i suggest sending him an email that he'd read and just be like "sorry for going off at you like that, but i was annoyed youd spread something like that, especially since its personal to me - not cool to use something like that just as a conversation starter... bye." and maybe distance yourself from B for a little bit, i think its healthy for you - he sounds a little bit odd/confused so maybe at this moment in time a break from him is best vent your frustrations about it to your closest friends, like everytime you get mad over it all anyway i would describe this situation as like one of those finger traps - the more you struggle that harder it is - the tighter it is to get out of so take a step back, take a breath - just nip it all in the bud before it becomes some crazy war/battle , but i mean if anyone asks anything just casually be like "yeh, so what, its my feelings not yours - so why should it have anything to do with you" p.s the andrew guy sounds like a good friend - talking things out with you and all that Link to comment
pianoguy Posted July 12, 2009 Share Posted July 12, 2009 Hi unusual, A couple of things: 1) You do have to realize, on some level, that people are going to find out about this, and that it will not be the end of the world. I'm not saying that it was okay for B to betray your trust that way, but speaking practically, now that you've let the cat out of the bag, people are going to find out. Consider Andrew for example- I'm sure that you probably would never have told him and would not have expected him to take it so well- not only was he a good friend to you, but he's helping you through this by talking with you. He's a very kind person, and I think you'll find that there are more Andrew's out there than you might think. 2) I understand that you were very angry at B, but angry e-mails and IM's don't ever solve anything. Serious issues like this have to be done on the phone or in person. Next time you're in the mind to send an angry e-mail to him (or anyone, for that matter), relax, count to ten, and let it sit in your inbox for AT LEAST a day before you answer it, you'll be more calm and rational at that point. 3) I think you need to get some distance from B if you want to salvage the friendship... if you keep going down this path you might end up hating him, which is no good. Link to comment
jimmyvanbeck Posted July 12, 2009 Share Posted July 12, 2009 Pianoguy knows what he's talking about, Andrew seems like your closer or more true friend. Why don't you just cut off connections from B for the next like 2 weeks or something, or even the whole summer. Then you'll forget about him and the poblems will decrease. Don't send angry emails, just let him know that it's in your best interest that people don't know. Be rational, don't let your emotions control your actions. Link to comment
Unusual U Posted July 14, 2009 Author Share Posted July 14, 2009 Haha, okay, guys, it's all good now, LOL. He hasn't been on AIM for a while because his brothers kick him off the computer alot, LOL, he as three brothers. And I told him on MySpace that I was sorry about the messege, before he got it, that I was sorry because when I sent it I was really mad. He then got on AIM and we talked and he said he was sorry for telling Andrew. He said that he didn't know it would be a problem because he said Andrew as a good friend of mine too and he thought It'd be okay to tell him. I forgave him and he said he wouldn't tell anyone else. So. . . . yeah. . . . Him and I are all good. I'm not really gonna distance myself from him because we're both over all of this, so it's okay, and we're talking with no problems and I'm not angery at him so yeah. Also, we have alot of mutual friends and we go to the same partys and hang out with eachother, in a group, usually. So him and I are all good!!! And, yes, I understand people are gonna find out, but when I make it clear that I don't want them telling anyone and they promise they won't, it's understandable I'd be angry with them. . . . Link to comment
closetfreak Posted July 26, 2009 Share Posted July 26, 2009 still take a little break from B, it seems like whenever he talks to you a little more your feelings come back and your really really really hurting yourself. Try to find someone openly gay, Wow this was a long post. Link to comment
Unusual U Posted July 28, 2009 Author Share Posted July 28, 2009 Yeah, I've been kinda taking a break without taking a break. . . . If you guys understand. . . . Like, I haven't really talked to or seen him in a while, but I'm not avioding him. And I think I've moved on anyway, finally. . . . Yeah, this is a long post!!! Link to comment
Unusual U Posted July 31, 2009 Author Share Posted July 31, 2009 Haha, yeah, around that age. Yeah, Bray Dog is pretty cool too. Where has he been? BRAY DOG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?! Bahahahahaha! Why? Link to comment
Unusual U Posted August 1, 2009 Author Share Posted August 1, 2009 Ohh, okay! You're welcome, LOL! Sorry, but the way your post came accross to me seemed a little sketchy so I was just like, "Uhhh, why is he asking???" LOL! (Sometimes I get really suspicious {sp?} of things. . . .) Link to comment
Bray_Dog Posted August 3, 2009 Share Posted August 3, 2009 Hey lol Well, i've been pretty busy, starting back at school then i went away for a week, then back at school from my holiday and yea. Oh and then i accidentally used all our internet usage + an extra 3Gigs haha oooopssss... Anyway, wow i missed alot... haha, yea so i agree with everyone else, Andrew = GOOD FRIEND haha. As for B i think i'd be pretty peeved if i was you.. i had a friend do the exact same thing first week back at skewl and i was like * * * !! WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT!?!?!?!? And Rossanna (she told my friend [jacob]) and she was like, "well you guys are good friends and i didn't think you would mind" and i was like... "AAAARRRRGGGGHHHH!!!" haha, but i got over it coz jacob was like "dw bout it i think ur a cool guy and it doesn't chang our friendship etc. and i was like haha ok... (oh and its fun to sometimes [very very jokeingly] hit on him, and he gets all grossed out lol) Anyway, i reckon ur doing the right thing and i know what you mean, you distancing yourself without being rude.. if thats right?? lol. I think B would get it if ur not like total besties any more, but he'll see you just wanna be mates.. As for me, well Vegemite is being less of and ass and is being nicer but apparently he likes some girl in our grade so i don't see much hope there anyways. Jam (haha jam..) is being super friendly to me and i think hes figured out i like him but he doesn't care, i think he might even like me back but yea... we'll see bout that one.. Oh and theres this new guy at skewl who i think liked me (coz i kept catchin him staring at me [like really really staring and not stopping when i look him in the eyes with a questioning look]) but i don't like him so yea.. but it'd be kewl if we could be friends, have someone to relate (that looks like wrong spelling lol) to at skewl. Anyways.... I'm off to bed coz its almost midnight and i have skewl 2moro.. oh and also my mum and i had a big talk bout me being gay and she was all like "its good that you told me and i support you no matter what and i'll always love you" haha so yea This is a very very very very very very very very loooooong post.. OOOOOOOOOOOKKKKKKKKKKKK... Goodnight, l8rzzzzz Link to comment
Bray_Dog Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 Arrrrgggghhh, ok so... one of my half friend ppls, that knows im gay, apparently used my sexuality as a conversation starter yesterday in her bussiness class with a bunch of 4 ppl that like hate me. Annnnnddddd, of course it spread like wild fire and now ther r roumers going around ;ike half the school and yea.. soooo i at the moment no-one has directly confonted me and asked me but if they do i have devised an ingenious plan!! Haha, basically my best friend alex (who isn't all that much in the looks department) said it'd be kewl if we pretended to go out for a while to cover the roumers up. so if anyone is like "hey are you really gay?" i'll just be like " * * * no, im going out with alex.. were did u here that from?". Hopefully it'll work because if it gets out im gay i think i'll be movin skewls lol coz, being a christian skewl, they'll be like "OMG!! (oh my goodness), may the power of christ compell you! may the power of christ compell you" etc.. with the whole holy water and cross thing hahahahaha.. (maybe i'll melt lol) anyways so what do u guys think of my plan, c anything goin wrong? Oh and my friendship with jay is expanding lol.. weird word.. haha but yea thats all going well.. XD Good night Link to comment
Unusual U Posted August 15, 2009 Author Share Posted August 15, 2009 I agree with you plan!!! But that's so messed up! Seriously, what's wrong with people?!?! Link to comment
Bray_Dog Posted August 15, 2009 Share Posted August 15, 2009 Haha, thanks but now alex says that she doesn't want to coz her friends dont like me all that much and they'll be all pissed at her or something.. oh well i'm just gonna let ppl believe wat they wanna and yea. coz if i show that i care people are gonna be more suspicious.. lol anyway have a good night, l8rzzzz Link to comment
chcmb43 Posted August 18, 2009 Share Posted August 18, 2009 This guy sounds like he is having major identity issues, which are borderlining on bipolar disorder. As cute as he is and as much as you feel for him, leave him alone. If he likes you, he will come around. Anything else will honestly cause you to feel a more intense version of the pain you have already felt. Link to comment
Bray_Dog Posted August 26, 2009 Share Posted August 26, 2009 All problems are solved.. for now haha. Yea well everythings good for me. I'm progressing with Jam. I think that i might try and sit with him at lunch 2moro.. just see what he does lol. Then i plan to ask if he wants to come to the movies with me and a group of my friends that are in his grade.. just say how it plays out. I might make a real little move like put my hand near his and see what he does.. lol might work. Worst comes to worse he says no to the movies or if he comes and i make a move and he moves away i'll just be like 'oh sorry' lol Anyway hope everythings going ok with you Unusual L8rzzz Link to comment
stevew Posted August 26, 2009 Share Posted August 26, 2009 OMG, this sounds SO much like the guy I was dating, except for he knew he wanted sex, but this is SO how he acted towards me when he wanted to flirt and have me pay attention to him. The problem here is that it might make him avoid you to make the first move because it sounds like he is definitely bisexual but in denial. I would: still play it cool, but actively pursue dating more well adjusted to their own sexual identity individuals. If he does make a first move, I would definitely definitely not let it go far before asking him what his intentions are, and then if he tells you that he is testing the waters, confused, etc. I would by all means tell him that when he makes a decision about his identity, that only then would you be available to date because it's in both of your best interests, you need to be true to yourself and not settle for someone who will just give you scraps. Link to comment
Bray_Dog Posted August 30, 2009 Share Posted August 30, 2009 Thanks stevew Great advise there. Will definitely keep that in my head. Atm I am just kinda waiting for him to make a move. And ur totally right, he's started to avoid me a biut now but if i kinda start conversation he'll respond and will talk to me.. Haha, anyway i'll keep u updated Link to comment
Unusual U Posted August 30, 2009 Author Share Posted August 30, 2009 Haha! Wow. . . . Well good luck with all of that! For me. . . . NM has been happin' with me lately, schools starting up again soon so maybe they'll be another drama I'll be posting on here that you guys could help me out with! XD Link to comment
Bray_Dog Posted September 10, 2009 Share Posted September 10, 2009 Through a long long story.. I'm pretty sure Jam not only knows im gay but also knows that i like him. He kind of hinted it in a way so yea.. YAY!!! Haha, i figure now he atleast knows that the options ther if he wants it.. Oh and i added him on Myspace which wa kinda also wat helped to lead to him figuring it out and yea, i can send him messages and stuff now easier if i want to. So YAY!!!! HAHAHAHAHA I'm super excited now XD Well have a good night Link to comment
Bray_Dog Posted September 12, 2009 Share Posted September 12, 2009 Weeeell... he deleted me from myspace and i dont know why.. no i didnt harras him or anything. i just sent a message asking for his msn and commented on a pic on his myspace, then i discovered he deleted me the next morning.. this sux.. Link to comment
Unusual U Posted September 19, 2009 Author Share Posted September 19, 2009 AWWW! Well, maybe you should go and ask him why. . . . That's kinda my only solution. Link to comment
Bray_Dog Posted September 20, 2009 Share Posted September 20, 2009 Yea im on school holi's now though so i cant but thats wat i was going to do. i did send a message on myspace but he hasnt replied for like a week Link to comment
Unusual U Posted October 6, 2009 Author Share Posted October 6, 2009 Ohhh. Okay, well, I got kinda BIG news for y'allzzz. . . . .... .... .... .... I HAVE A BOYFRIEND!!! And I'm TOTALLY over B. Link to comment
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