Liking one of your friends

[lost88]

I have known this guy named Michael for a little over a year now. When i first met him i liked him alot but he didnt feel the same way for me. Over time we became pretty good friends and i started hanging out at his house alot. I started to have old feelings come back. My best friend and Michaels best friend were going out and just when things started to go really good for me and michael they broke up. We had just told each other that we liked each other and we were ready to start from there because of the break up with our friends i wouldnt beable to see Michael as often. We tried to work things out but again it ended in friendship. Well a few months later my best friend and Michaels best friend get back together and now i like Michael again. I told him how i felt but he doesnt want anything serious because he has been hurt so many times. I understand that but every other X girlfriend that he has had ended badly. He hates them now. Im scared that if me and Michael take things to the next level that we wont beable to be friends if things dont work out. I dont know what to do..if anyone knows any advice please write back...thank u..- lost88

[mermayd]

First off, don't worry about the future that way. You are already creating negative thoughts within yourself when the situation is not relevant and has not occurred. It doesn't ahve to be the exact same as everyother time he has had a break up. It could be different wiht you. Secondly, Your friends are back together, but even if they weren't, that shouldn't prevent you from your own personal happiness...and I will quote swingfox on this (he is famous for this) "You have one obligation in your life and that is the obligation for YOU to be happy". If you and he like eachother, then nothing should prevent you from dating...you are not violating any rules of friendship. Lastly, you do not have to make anything serious right away. For anything to be true and "serious" it will come naturally. Date casually, nothing to heavy, and in time if you two are right for eachother...things will evolve from there. Good luck. Hope this helped.

[bleeder]

Hi Lost88,

 

Have you accessed your feelings for this guy? Are you really in love with him? Or do u just need someone to be there for you now?

 

Especially after seeing your friend with him, it might just cause some sparks of jealousy and possession. Think about it. Be certain that you have true feelings before proceeding. Remember that you might be seen as a 3rd party if you were get closer to him now.

 

Weigh the pros and cons first yah? Cheers.

[SwingFox]

I will quote swingfox on this (he is famous for this) "You have one obligation in your life and that is the obligation for YOU to be happy"

 

*shrugs* ... what's here for me to add?? *grins*. People are even quoting me here?? LOL... HEEEELP!!! I just gave out my SwingFox Fluffy Pillow© to a friend in need.

 

Mermayd is right and hmm... my rule in life DOES apply. You come first for the time being, then someone else. Are you really serious about depending a relationship on your best friend's relationship. My suggestion is to stop that immediately and go about your own business with your friend Michael.

 

Bleeder!! You're good!! It's always a good idea to weighs pros and cons first. See what you need in a relationship and what you expect out of it. Then communicate them to your friend Michael and see how he responds. That will clarify a lot in no time.

 

I hope my addition was of help for you. Good luck!

 

~ SwingFox ~