peaceacake Posted July 27, 2008 Share Posted July 27, 2008 I am new here, stumbled onto the cite looking for help. I think I found a good place. Anyway, my story is much the same as everyone else's. Have been dating a guy for nine months. Didn't fight, got along great, were committed. Two weeks ago, he broke up with me in a TEXT Message. He's 42 by the way. I know he has been under a LOT of stress with his work, he travels extensively, has little time for himself and recently had a mini-stroke. I think of course, due to stress. I am not needy, clingy and am very independent so that was not the issue. We live an hour and 15 min. apart and he was due to come to my house two weeks ago for a motorcycle ride and dinner, etc. I texted Good morning, nothing.. waited an hour and a half, nothing. Waited another hour and a half, called. Nothing. (We had no real specific time set, I was trying to get some idea, also he always, always has his cell phone with him and on). He calls shortly thereafter, I say, Was trying to get a hold of you. He explains an errand he had to run. I say. You don't reply to my text messages anymore? what's up with that? (Again, unusual, because usually within 5-10 minutes, he replies. So, he TOTALLY goes off on me... saying .. He doesn't walk around with his cell phone up his "you know what" yelling at me. I say, I really don't like the way you are speaking to me. He says,,, YOU KNOW what!????? THIS! Hangs up on me, and within ten minutes.. sends me a text message.. "YOU wanted a break-up text msg, you got it. ITS OVER, I'd HAD MY SHARE."... what the heck is going on is what I am thinking... so.. I don't reply... thining wow.. stress has made him crazy,, he'll cool off and we'll talk about it.. an hour later, a second text, "I am so P***ED off with everyone's BS... I don't reply. An hour later... text.. "I am fed up with everyone's BS, I am my own person".. I try to call, he won't answer. Two days later, I get an email, it goes on to say..how he is totally stressed out, is being pulled in all directions, has no time for himself and he is DONE with everyone who is trying to control or snap at him." Long story short, I wait a day, send a nice reply, I understand what you are dealing with, but I do have stuff going on in my life. Why aren't we talking to EACH OTHER. He answers that he will reply but never does. I wait a week. I text him, he answers, we share maybe five meaningless texts messages and he ends with.. "I am in my own world, sorry but can't explain". I respond with,, I will pray for you. Again. I wait about four days, try to call him. He goes OFF on me.. "WHAT??? WHAT DO YOU WANT? I say to talk? He again, goes off with how much he is dealing with at work and can't be bothered with this CRAP right now. Needless to say.. I made two more attempts to just say that I was indeed worried about him and was he ok. I also said I was feeling lost without hime. (we usually communicated at least ten times a day by either calls or texts)..NOTHING. That was two days ago, I am literally sick to my stomach, have chest pains and its obviously he prefers to deal with his issues by himself. Maybe someone can give me thier opinions here. I want to think there isn't anyone else but what grown man sends a text message to a girl he said he loved, couldn't wait to come back to when traveling and is totally treating me like he could care less about me or any of my feelings. From what I am reading on here, its best I suppose to just leave it alone and see what happens. I feel in my heart that he will never make any attempts to contact me and the situation is hopeless and I should just try to move on. I am so very very confused by how he is acting and am also worried about his health. Sorry this was so long. Hopefully I can get some feedback. Thanks!! Link to comment
DN Posted July 27, 2008 Share Posted July 27, 2008 Welcome to eNotAlone. I think is might be very indicative that he had a mini-stroke. Information about that is here: link removed Are you sure that he actually had one? Because according to the article he is in the zone for another and if he is still living the stressful life he was before - then something had to give and that is why he flipped on you. Link to comment
Seraphim Posted July 27, 2008 Share Posted July 27, 2008 I would leave it alone for now and see if he comes to you. He feels overwhelmed obviously. I would not call or txt or anything and see if he comes to you. I am sorry he is acting this way. Link to comment
peaceacake Posted July 28, 2008 Author Share Posted July 28, 2008 Thanks for reading and replying. That is what I am going to do. Leave it alone. I can't do anything else. Its very very HARD. Link to comment
peaceacake Posted July 28, 2008 Author Share Posted July 28, 2008 Thanks for reading and replying. I appreciate your opinion. And yes.. he did have one.. it was late May. I never did find out anything about his stress test since we are no longer talking. And I hear you, he definitely flipped on ME.. but don't normal people usually realize they messed up and apologize? I am just upset that I am being treated like this and he doesn't care.. guess we all know about that though. Link to comment
DN Posted July 28, 2008 Share Posted July 28, 2008 He may be too embarrassed. i am not excusing him but a mini-stroke can bring on all sorts of behavioral changes that are not reflective of someone's true personality. Link to comment
Seraphim Posted July 28, 2008 Share Posted July 28, 2008 I know it is hard. There was someone I did not talk to for 7 months once. I hope it gets better and he sees reason. Link to comment
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