D_Lish Posted July 23, 2008 Share Posted July 23, 2008 I've just been on this chat/flirt site I frequent and over the past month have been occasionally chatting to this guy on there. He went away on holiday to Greece last week and has returned today.. Anyway, he comes online, asks what I've been up to, he's missed me and I say *how did your holiday go, missed you too*, tell him that I'm thinking of leaving this chat site, which I am thinking of doing because I'm starting to get bored there....and in his next msg he says, *Well I will miss you because I've enjoyed our odd chats, how about we meet up for an innocent coffee sometime*. Anyway, I'd said *Yes, why not, maybe in a couple of weeks or so* He doesn't live that far from me. Then he didn't and hasn't replied and half hour later, went offline! LOL!! They ask you out for coffee, then they ignore ya!! I'm not interested in this guy in anyway. I mean, he is nice looking, has a great sense of humour, but I see him as just a friend...so it doesn't bother me. Men are strange creatures Link to comment
isilv3r Posted July 23, 2008 Share Posted July 23, 2008 lol Sounds pretty typical. Although, keep in mind that perhaps something distracted him from his computer and he had to get up and leave. When he returned, he may have shut down his programs without realizing or remembering the conversation you guys had. Link to comment
Mlost Posted July 23, 2008 Share Posted July 23, 2008 Sadly, we are strange. But women are even stranger!! Link to comment
DN Posted July 24, 2008 Share Posted July 24, 2008 Well, first you say you are leaving the chat-room because it's boring - which he may have thought included him as being one of the reasons you were bored. Then when he invites you to meet for coffee you say "Yes, maybe in a week or two" which can also be taken as "I don't want to say 'no' so I'll just be wishy-washy and hope you'll get the hint that I'm not really interested". Link to comment
annie24 Posted July 24, 2008 Share Posted July 24, 2008 i think DN might be right. if you are still interested, shoot him a message and ask if he is free for coffee on saturday.... Link to comment
deleted-account Posted July 24, 2008 Share Posted July 24, 2008 Yeah, to me the "couple of weeks" comment would be taken as rejection. Like DN wrote, it sounds like you don't want to go but you don't want to say no. Link to comment
SchecterGuy Posted July 24, 2008 Share Posted July 24, 2008 Yeah, to me the "couple of weeks" comment would be taken as rejection. Like DN wrote, it sounds like you don't want to go but you don't want to say no. I was thinking this. That seems like a long time to get a cup of coffee. Gotta wait two weeks to get an hour of your time. Link to comment
D_Lish Posted July 24, 2008 Author Share Posted July 24, 2008 I was thinking this. That seems like a long time to get a cup of coffee. Gotta wait two weeks to get an hour of your time. Im not interested in the guy in that way and we have only chatted a handful of times and briefly lucky I said Id go at all. But anyway, he replied and said *Yeah, we will have to arrange something*....that was it, showed as much enthusiasm, as I did I guess, despite it being his idea.....soooo I just aint gonna bother replying. Link to comment
DN Posted July 24, 2008 Share Posted July 24, 2008 he's lucky I said Id go at all. Interesting comment. Link to comment
D_Lish Posted July 24, 2008 Author Share Posted July 24, 2008 Interesting comment. In what way? A lot of women probably wouldn't have said they would go and particularly if they wern't interested. And it's not a dating site I'm on...just a chat place similar to here. I said yes because, he seems an ok guy and I dare say I would've gone along... I got this feeling that SchecterGuy was saying I wasn't being fair, in making this guy wait for two weeks....hence why I said, he's lucky I said yes, lol. I hardly know this guy, I dont owe him anything...and I'm certainly not gonna rush around and drop everything and put plans on postpone for him, so I can run off and have a coffee asap. Now if hed been a romantic interest....diff story Link to comment
Weeblie Posted July 24, 2008 Share Posted July 24, 2008 So if you weren't interested in him and he picked up on the fact that you weren't interested in him... Then why say men are funny...? Seems like he did what any person would do. Link to comment
SchecterGuy Posted July 24, 2008 Share Posted July 24, 2008 I don't think that its not fair. I just do not see hanging out for a cup of coffee taking a lot of time. Not saying you have to be right over, but an unsure two weeks for somehting that takes an hour and a half at most would just give the impression that your saying no without saying no. I just say that from experience. I have dealt with a couple of girls who would say no by making excuses not to hang out. It was usually followed up by the maybe next week. Not saying that is what you are doing, but it can come off like that. Link to comment
D_Lish Posted July 24, 2008 Author Share Posted July 24, 2008 So if you weren't interested in him and he picked up on the fact that you weren't interested in him... Then why say men are funny...? Seems like he did what any person would do. Well...even if I'd been interested, I would probably have reacted same way. I don't like to come accross desperate. And thing is and despite my brief reply, I had still showed an interest by saying I'd go....and it still took him ages to get back to me. And, while I've been chatting to a friend on this site, I've just been informed that this guy, actually has a gf!!!! Link to comment
Batya33 Posted July 24, 2008 Share Posted July 24, 2008 Since when is a response "yes that would be nice" or "yes that would be nice - what's your schedule like in the next week?" "desperate"? I find it "strange" that you think a complete stranger should feel lucky that you agree to meet him for coffee sometime. But not based on gender, just "strange." Link to comment
Aurian Posted July 24, 2008 Share Posted July 24, 2008 Weird. Guy asks you out for coffee. Guy detects lack of enthusiasm for the offer ("Oh, maybe in a few weeks.") Guy decides that you`re not interested and leaves. Woman gets huffy that he didn`t pursue it even though she isn`t interested. Yeah, men are funny. Link to comment
D_Lish Posted July 24, 2008 Author Share Posted July 24, 2008 Woman gets huffy LOL....huh? Where are the signs I was huffy about it?? I thought it was well funny actually...hence, men are funny...as in funny ha ha Link to comment
Batya33 Posted July 24, 2008 Share Posted July 24, 2008 LOL....huh? Where are the signs I was huffy about it?? I thought it was well funny actually...hence, men are funny...as in funny ha ha I don't think it's funny - it's perfectly normal not to waste your time pursuing someone who gives that kind of response, whether in dating or in friendship. Link to comment
D_Lish Posted July 25, 2008 Author Share Posted July 25, 2008 The guy shouldn't even be pursuing anybody to go for coffee....he has a gf! And I'm now pleased I responded way I did. Actually my response wasn't that bad....I had made some joke and then said two weeks. Next time I will remember, to add all info Link to comment
Weeblie Posted July 25, 2008 Share Posted July 25, 2008 And, while I've been chatting to a friend on this site, I've just been informed that this guy, actually has a gf!!!! Just been informed? The guy shouldn't even be pursuing anybody to go for coffee....he has a gf! And I'm now pleased I responded way I did. Actually my response wasn't that bad....I had made some joke and then said two weeks. Next time I will remember, to add all info lol And if you had known that the guy had a g/f before he asked you out for coffee, this would've been real 'funny'. Link to comment
D_Lish Posted July 26, 2008 Author Share Posted July 26, 2008 Just been informed? I got chatting to someone and they know people he chats with... ..lol And if you had known that the guy had a g/f before he asked you out for coffee, this would've been real 'funny'. Did I say that?? What a fuss! ROFLMAOOO! Link to comment
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