Very lengthy read, Pt. 2 (Not so "lengthy" anymore!)

[Crazyaboutdogs]

Good for you! At least now you know you tried whatever the outcome. The most important thing is that you try...the outcome is now out of your hands but you can now hold your head up high that you gave it your best shot and tried to take the fantasy into reality.

[pianoguy]

Good for you Matt! What did you say?

[MattW]

Well, I didn't save it, so I'll have to try and remember what I wrote.

 

I think I said something like "hey, so, summer's almost over, and I was thinking, how 'bout you and me hang out one of these days? It'd be pretty cool to see you again, and catch up, and everything". I still have no idea where we can go, or meet up, or anything, because I'm not very familiar with the city she lives in, or what kind of places she likes to go, just yet.

[Crazyaboutdogs]

Sounds like a good email..friendly and casual so that she feels no pressure.

[MattW]

Only problem is, I'm currently without a means of transportation, and will be for a few weeks. So, even if she's up for getting together, I don't have a way to go anywhere.

[MD Geist]

Thats great to hear man!

[Crazyaboutdogs]

Only problem is, I'm currently without a means of transportation, and will be for a few weeks. So, even if she's up for getting together, I don't have a way to go anywhere.

 

No buses? No trains?

[MattW]

Well, I'm not talking about when she's back in school, heh, I'm talking about right now, while she's still home.

[Crazyaboutdogs]

Well, I'm not talking about when she's back in school, heh, I'm talking about right now, while she's still home.

 

Yeah, so am I. Is there no public transportation where you are?

[MattW]

I dunno about trains, never looked into that. Plus, her home city's only 15-20 minutes away, so train seems kinda silly. Plenty of buses around, but I've never been on one, so I'm pretty inexeperienced with using one, heh...

[Crazyaboutdogs]

I dunno about trains, never looked into that. Plus, her home city's only 15-20 minutes away, so train seems kinda silly. Plenty of buses around, but I've never been on one, so I'm pretty inexeperienced with using one, heh...

 

 

Time to learn how to ride the bus...and just to get you ready for the adventure...here is weird Al Yankovic's "Another One Rides the Bus"

 

Riding in the bus down the boulevard

And the place was pretty packed (Yeah!)

Couldn't find a seat so I had to stand

With the perverts in the back

It was smelling like a locker room

There was junk all over the floor

We're already packed in like sardines

But we're stopping to pick up more, look out

 

(Chorus)

Another one rides the bus

Another one rides the bus

Another comes on and another comes on

Another one rides the bus

Hey, who's gonna sit by you

Another one rides the bus

 

There's a suitcase poking me in the ribs

There's an elbow in my ear

There's a smelly old bum standing next to me

Hasn't showered in a year

I think I'm missing a contact lens

I think my wallet's gone

And I think this bus is stopping again

To let a couple more freaks get on look out

 

(Chorus)

 

(cool sound effects)

 

Another one rides the bus

 

Another one rides the bus ow

Another one rides the bus hey hey

Another one rides the bus hey-ey-ey-ey ey ey eyyyyyy

 

The window doesn't open and the fan is broke

And my face is turning blue (Yeah)

I haven't been in a crowd like this

Since I went to see the Who

Well I should've got off a couple miles ago

But I couldn't get to the door

There isn't any room for me to breathe

And now we're gonna pick up more yeaaah

[MattW]

By the way, I got called back for a second interview (which I just got home from) from that job I went in for about a week ago. Dunno if I got the job, just yet, but here's hoping.

 

And this girl hasn't written me back, yet, but again, I'm not too surprised, since it usually takes her a while to write back. I noticed, though, that one of her (female) friends left her a comment a few weeks ago, I guess "consoling" her about the breakup, telling her to just "not focus on dating for a while" and "just have fun". Which, is understandable, but being that I have so little time to get my foot in the door, here, it makes me a little nervous that I'll be doomed to the "I'm just not ready for another relationship right now" response.

[Crazyaboutdogs]

Hopefully you will get the job. As for the girl...better if she takes it slowly than uses you as rebound.

[MattW]

But how do I know the difference between taking things slowly and being a rebound? If I get the "I'm not ready for another relationship right now" thing, doesn't that mean I'm pretty much done?

[Crazyaboutdogs]

No. You can still be her friend and see where that leads.

[MattW]

Yeah, but I dunno that I could be a permanent "just a friend" to her, in the long run.

[Crazyaboutdogs]

Yeah, but I dunno that I could be a permanent "just a friend" to her, in the long run.

 

Yes, that is indeed a gamble. I went that route once and was forever stuck as a long distance friend while he went and married someone local..and neglected to tell me until I read about in the paper.

[MattW]

Yeah, that's a big reason I've been really sheepish about trying for this right now. The timing here just does not to seem to be in my favor, and I had hoped that maybe if I held out a bit, and take a look at where she's at later in life, maybe a better oppurtunity will have presented itself? I just hate having this feeling that I already know the outcome of this whole thing, and that it's not good...

[Crazyaboutdogs]

In your situation, I really don't think another opportunity would have presented itself. You really did have to go the friends route initially. If you had waited, it doesn't sound like you would really have gotten very far with her going back to school and you being in this other town. Since you are close by right now, you had to do this in order to set the stage before she goes away. There really was no other way. If you were both going to be going to the same school that would have been different, you would have had more time.

[MattW]

Well, I didn't mean the near future; I meant, like, next summer, or the summer after that, or when she finishes school altogether. 'Course, that's a LONG time to wait, and who knows what could happen in the next three years, or if she'll be single or not, but still. Right now, it feels like I'm almost doomed to get screwed over by the timing and the little complications, and that's why I'm almost reluctant to be trying to pursue this now, because it feels like why bother when I already know what's going to happen? Ah well...

[jenny_mcs]

Stop dooming yourself by looking 4 or 5 steps ahead of things. Just take it one thing at a time. 1) see what her response is and 2) Hopefully meet up for lunch or dinner

[Crazyaboutdogs]

Stop dooming yourself by looking 4 or 5 steps ahead of things. Just take it one thing at a time. 1) see what her response is and 2) Hopefully meet up for lunch or dinner

 

 

I agree. Anything in life can be doomed to failure..that doesn't mean you don't try. Looking for a job, starting a new job, taking a driver's test etc. there are endless ways for things not to work out...if you go through life looking at how things may not work out, you will miss out on amazing opportunities.

[MattW]

Of course. I AM giving this a go, I just feel like I already know how it's going to go down.

[Crazyaboutdogs]

Of course. I AM giving this a go, I just feel like I already know how it's going to go down.

 

Perhaps it is a long shot..but if it doesn't work out then at least you will be able to put it aside and move on with your life no longer wondering what if.

[jenny_mcs]

Of course. I AM giving this a go, I just feel like I already know how it's going to go down.

 

I get the feeling you do this a lot. For example, when you found out that she and her bf broke up, you sent her a message a little bit later, and then expected her to reply and tell you that she and her bf had broken up, and you had it all planned out what you thought she would say, etc. And then when she replied, she didn't even mention it.

 

It seems like in this situation you expect it to turn out 1 of 2 ways. 1) You guys will meet up but she won't be interested in you due to the million reasons you have already imagined (distance, your height, she just got out of a relationship, etc) OR 2) You 2 will start dating.

 

What you don't seem to get is that this could turn out a lot of different ways. Maybe you'll get together and you won't even like the person that she is as an adult. Maybe you'll meet up and and there won't be any romantic chemistry, but you'll become good friends. Maybe you'll meet up and she'll think you're perfect for a friend of hers and want to set you up.

 

The point is- WHO KNOWS! Try to get over this attitude that yo know what's going to happen. Anything could happen!