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How long does it take for ladies to heal? (Ladies reply only)

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I don't know that I'd call myself the dumper but I'm the one who finally walked away.


That was in January. Hung out with him once or twice after that. Most weeks I'm great! I still have odd bad dreams here and there. Still have thoughts that cross my mind and make me sad, mad, upset, angry...

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I was the dumpee. We tried again and it was awful, that round I was the dumper. That was about a year ago.


The first few months were the worst. Then I met someone new and finally saw my old relationship with open eyes. There wasn't an official time. I was definetely "over" him by the time I started my new relationship, but it's taken much longer to let go of the idea of friendship and anger, resentment, bitterness.....


I guess I would say I'm "over" him, but it's also sort of a work in progress of forgiving him and wishing him well in his new life.

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My ex was playing mind games when he and I "mutually" broke up. I later became the dumper because I could not deal with his emotional abuse. It's been 9 months since the break-up now and I'm getting weaker and weaker by the minute. I don't think I will ever heal from this one. This relationship left a permanent hole in my heart. :sad:


May I know why you are asking? Are you going to average out our answers to evaluate how long it may take your ex to heal? It's different for everyone.

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Last two relationships I was technically the dumper but really the dumpee, as I was backed into the corner of leaving by their behaviour.


Most recent relationship: lasted two months, a guy that wasn't right for me but I fell very hard for, had a very hard time getting over it, but its been five months now and feel like I'm basically over it. It helps that he kicked me to the curb and never looked back. We basically had no contact since the break-up, and certainly nothing friendly or caring that could lead me to think either of us had made a mistake ending it.


The one before that: lasted three years, and two years later, I am over HIM but not over the hurt and issues that the relationship, and the way it ended, left me with. That is to say, I don't think about him or miss him, but I think a lot about the effect he has had on my life and my options.


So I guess there's no cut and dried answer to "how long"...really depends on the factors involved...

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I think it depends how the relationship was: how long, how intense.


After my first relationship it took me 2 months and I was the dumper. Now after my second break-up 2 months have passed and I am still not at all over him. This time I am the dumpee. Both relationships lasted 2 years..

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My ex kept thinking I was over it cos I put on a brave face.


Been nearly 2 months and I still feel like im dying inside. Its getting better though. Ive reached a stage where Im wondering whether I want him back or whether I just miss the feeling of being in a relationship. I think thats progress lol.


I wouldnt be where I was today if it weren't for ENA though.

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It took me exactly 10 months.

But, it is possible to heal earlier. 4 months is just enough.

Just try hard to work on yourself, and cut the contact with your ex.

I did the first one, and I did it great, when my ex started to call me.

That was the reason that extended my healing process.

Maybe somebody thinks that 10 months, year, 1,5 year is too much time to get over somebody, but time passes so fast.

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Life is too short to cry and worry about something that didn't work. Doesn't matter what side of the breakup you are on.





Thank you for that... because its true... here I am crying over my boyfriend that broke up with me yesterday but then I know in my heart and soul that it was for the best...


So now I just have to suck it up and move on... plain and simple, I dont want to waste anymore of my life on him... i already wasted the 4 years we were together.

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Well, my ex broke up with me toward the end of January and I have not heard from him ever since. A few weeks ago, I did make a post on his journal because he shared some happy news in his life and it made me feel good and happy too. I simply felt excited for him. Since then, he hasn't posted anything new on his journal.


I've had my ups and downs. I'm glad actually he hasn't contacted me at any time up to this point because it would have gave me false hope. So his silence (or laziness) has helped me heal.


Besides, I would like him to contact me if he is genuinely wanting to be in my life again not mopping.


I don't really know how long it takes to fully recover. When you love someone so deep, I don't think you can fully forget them.

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